Lois & Clark Forums
Posted By: ChiefPam FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 10:45 AM
Oh, this was great! Very sparse writing style, but you get their emotions across very plainly. And I love the backwards revelation:

Quote
“And how do you know that? Are you Superman and you x-rayed in?”

-----

Several moments pass before I can form a coherent thought again.

She knows. There is no way she said that coincidentally.

I realize my jaw has dropped open. I close it, swallow hard and speak. “Actually, I only used my super-hearing. Can I come in now?”
And she still doesn't let him goofy At least until he shocks her -- love that he's convinced it was an incredibly stupid thing to say, but it's the one thing that got her to open up.

I love that "eventually" wink Great ending.

Great job, Anna!

PJ
Posted By: Sheila Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 11:23 AM
Oh, Anna...I simply loved it! party
Posted By: IreneD Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 12:25 PM
Very, very nicely done! I like the writing style a lot and just love the backwards revelation.

Great job!

Irene
Posted By: Karen Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 12:25 PM
Beautiful and funny. Yes, Lois *should* torture Clark! But she didn't hold out long enough... ah, well. laugh

Wonderful sequel!
Posted By: daneel Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 12:37 PM
Good sequel!! smile

Jose thumbsup
Posted By: lovetvfan Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 02:40 PM
This was incredibly cute. I like the first person style narratives from both perspectives. Usually I prefer the third person, but this just couldn't have worked as well if you had done it that way, so good job! Nice and waffy smile1
Posted By: Dave Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 03:34 PM
Oooh, Anna!

You posted! laugh

I loved BRing this story - it was fantastic. smile

You already know what I think about this story, so I'll just say... it's hilarious and wonderful! <g>

Dave (who thinks Anna needs to forget about school and spend more time writing <g>)
Posted By: Wendymr Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 05:42 PM
Absolutely fantastic, Anna! I loved it! smile

Everyone else has mentioned the reverse revelation, which I loved, and Pam mentioned the 'eventually'. Wonderful stuff! laugh But I almost laughed out loud at this:

Quote
I hate him. I despise him. I want him covered with tar and feathers and hung upside down from a tree to dry.
rotflol

You have a great handle on the first-person present tense style here. It's sparsely written, yet the emotions and reactions flow through very clearly. And there's nothing here to show that English isn't your first language. Your writing is just getting better and better, Anna.

This and the prequel are going straight on my Kerth list. And I want more from you! wildguy


Wendy smile
Posted By: Laurach Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 07:16 PM
Great job! I also loved the reverse revelation. Very cute and sweet story. Laura
Posted By: mariadferdez. Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 08:46 PM
Hi,

Love it! clap
Posted By: Nicole S Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 09:23 PM
Anna,

That was GREAT!!!! I loved it! I love this spin on the revelation laugh laugh laugh


~NICOLE
Posted By: Ank. K. S. Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/29/05 11:18 PM
thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup

thumbsup Absolutely superb!!! thumbsup

thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup
Posted By: TriciaW Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/30/05 01:24 AM
Anna

This is wonderful. smile1 I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Tricia cool
Posted By: mmprincess Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/30/05 06:55 PM
Short as it is, I loved it!! thumbsup
Posted By: Anna B. the Greek Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 10/31/05 03:55 PM
Thank you all so much!! As I mentioned earlier, I was quite unsure about this story, so I'm very happy to see it being received so enthusiastically smile

See ya,
AnnaBtG. (who, ignoring Dave's advice, is off to study History for tomorrow's test...)
Posted By: LabRat Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 11/07/05 02:49 AM
Well, now that you've submitted this one to the Archive, Anna, I couldn't resist reading it after catching the first few lines while checking over the file.

Absolutely adorable! Loved it to bits. I'm not usually a big fan of first person narrative, but this worked very well and I think using anything else wouldn't have been half as effective. Terribly cute.

And this:

Quote
“Who loves me?” I manage. “Clark, or Superman?”

“*I* love you,” he simply says.
made me go all snuffly. thumbsup

LabRat smile
Posted By: Lynn S. M. Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 04/09/22 01:31 AM
Hi Anna,

I just finished reading both stories in this series. What fun! I can understand why these are your favourite stories that you wrote.

One phrase especially had my laughing aloud: oblong tea. it was a minor part of the stories, but it really tickled my fancy.

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: KSaraSara Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 04/09/22 07:16 PM
I’m going to comment here since Lynn already bumped up the thread! laugh

(And for anyone who’s wondering, Anna mentioned this fic and its first story as her favorites she’s written in this thread about the favorite fics you’ve written. :))


Hah! I love Lois’ little revelation at the end of the first! And in the second… OMG… the “Actually, I only used my super-hearing.” line is SO amazingly perfect…the way he just simply answers instead of trying to hedge more and then wonders if he can come in now. Gah! I love it!

Sara smile
Posted By: Anna B. the Greek Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 04/12/22 08:58 PM
Thank you for bumping this thread and leaving feedback! What a pleasant surprise! smile1

Lynn - yes!! Glad you liked this one! I'm ridiculously proud of it. grin

Sara - the revelation at the end of the first one really made the whole thing!

Glad you girls enjoyed it! smile

See ya,
AnnaBtG.
Posted By: Darth Michael Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 08/07/22 02:47 PM
Hi Anna,

Aaaand we can continue with Lois’s reaction smile1
Quote
Speechless, I watch him heading to the elevators…
…walking to the left of them…
…and taking the staircase leading to the roof.
He's dead meat.
So, does she have access to Kryptonite?
CLARK: shock help

Quote
A woman who left the oven turned on after she was done cooking. She vaguely reminded me of Lois.
laugh he should not tell Lois that.

Quote
What is she doing, breaking her pencils?
So she has more to pepper him with.

Quote
I hate him. I despise him
Oh, the old “he loves me / he loves me not” game.

Quote
The incompetent, lazy jerks! Can't a woman even berate her partner without everyone watching?
laugh

Quote
I look down. I see a pile of… well, pencil remains. I wish it had been a Clark Kent doll.
She could buy some Ken dolls. Point out their anatomical correctness. When Clark protests, she could raise an eyebrow and take out a pair of scissors to cut some paper.

Quote
I have much better things to do than occupy my mind with his pathetic lies.
How could he keep that from me?
/cocks eyebrow/
LOIS: What?

Quote
"I. Am. Perfectly. Okay!" I think that the way I emphasize my words does not suggest that I'm okay, but I'd rather die than admit that to that hypocrite.
clap

Quote
Lois Lane asked me a question, and I left it unanswered.
Yes, very dangerous.

Quote
I take a deep breath and knock on the door. Then wait.
***
That peephole is a very useful invention after all.
I lean with my back on the door, careful not to make any noises.
lol

Quote
"Lois, open the door, I know you're in there."
"And how do you know that? Are you Superman and you x-rayed in?"
CLARK: No, you answered the question so you must be in.
LOIS: mad

Quote
Actually, I only used my super-hearing. Can I come in now?"
laugh

Quote
"Lois, please, let me explain!"
"You are free to explain."
"To your door?"
"Then break in."
"I don't want to do that, Lois, please."
This guy is beginning to get boring.
"I beg you, let me come in. I know I should've told you."
He could try the window as Superman. Of course, once the Digger gets a photo of Superman pining away at Lois Lane’s window, things might take a turn for the worse.

Quote
"Lois, I beg you, just let me come in and explain and I'll never bother you again."
You are almost there.
"Lois, please, I love you."
Well, this certainly goes close to her being able to file a restraining order.

Quote
revealing a beautiful Lois Lane in a state of shock.
"What did you just say?"
laugh

Quote
And right now, as I look at this man, whoever he is, I know he is the one I love.
Although he has been a lunkhead.
He’ll do more stupid things. Well…more and stupider things.

Quote
"You have no excuse for not telling me earlier," I say quietly.
He's giving me the most beautiful smile as he reaches for my hand. "Will you forgive me?"
I smile back. "Of course I will."
He squeezes my hand and gives me another loving look. I can't help but play one last teasing on him.
"…Eventually."
Oh that was the most adorable tale! And will she make it contingent on his bringing her chocolate from distant places?
wave Michael
Posted By: Penny_Lane Re: FDK: No Excuse at All - 08/07/22 06:09 PM
I can see why both stories (No Excuse and No Excuse At All) are your favorites. Both are simply delightful!

clap clap clap

I would love to see a part 3!
© Lois & Clark Fanfic Message Boards