LabRat

Carol!!!! You're evil!!

Okay, backtracking a bit... this was a *great* section. Lois is finally using her brain, and like Labby, I loved Jonathan's matter of fact response to her wide-eyed reaction.

There were some funny lines, too... loved the one about moving to France

But.

Just when everything was coming together, you had her slip and fall???? You're evil. I never use this gremlin, but I think you've earned it:

PJ
who will nonetheless hold out hope that this will not turn out to be a setback... for Carol's sake...

EVIL!

She's finally starting to remember things, and now she hits her head again!



I can't wait to find out what happens next.
Good job.

Hi,

Wow! Great part. Want more, please.

MAF

I'm loving this story! It's great!

Now, about this:



I agree with everybody else. Get back here right now and post the next part! , Carol!

malu

Carol, I loved everything about this section. Well, almost everything...

I loved how Lois questions why her body responded to Clark even though her mind only wanted Max. Jonathan's quiet support during their entire conversation was, of course, wonderful, and totally in character. Everything about that conversation was wonderful. How Lois started questioning, and remembering, and then realizing what slime Deter is (yeah!!), but then...

oh no! Things were getting fixed! She knew Deter was scum, she knew the truth about Clark, she was remembering... now what?

Kathy

Good segment Carol
ditto others
more soon please
merry

Carol,

She fell and hit her head? Oh no! I loved the subtle switch in Lois's mind going from Max to Deter. And I also like how Lois started to remember things as she paced .

- Alicia

What they said! Loved it -- and then you pulled the rug out from under our collective feet! EVIL!

But we'll forgive you if you post the next part soon...

Yeah! Max...the jig is up!

Many people have mentioned in this thread that Carol is evil. But is she Evil? If you think so, come talk about it here.

carol, i was all set to come and post some nice FDK here... loved the line about "why was she suddenly feeling like she wanted to move to paris?" that just had me

loved jonathan's response to clark's flying off.

and she started remembering and figuring stuff out. that was cool. i was really liking this part.

and then i came and checked the FDK folder and saw something about her hitting her head. went back and looked closer at those last two lines... that's just evil.

well, we'll see what happens in part 5. maybe clark will catch her or it'll bring back more memories or something good will come of it...

guess that means you're going to have to post again soon.

Paul

, so you know you did *something* right...


Melisma (throwing a under her Rock in your honor)

Go, Jonathan! I know most people prefer Martha, but I really love Dad Kent. He's delightfully in character here and utterly fantastic!

Interesting that Lois could be open-minded enough with him, when if Clark had said the same things, she would have lashed out. Deter might have added some specifically anti-Clark things to his hypnosis, perhaps.

I must confess that the sudden trip and fall made absolutely no sense to me. Wasn't she holding Jonathan's arm at the time? Unless Clark decided to take a page out of Paul's book and use a two-by-four to "BONK!" rather than a beer bottle, I'm afraid it left me rolling my eyes rather than anxious. :rolleyes: But perhaps you'll make things clearer in the next installment. So why not post it as soon as possible?

Hazel

Carol

A wonderful part!

Lois's introspection is excellent. I'm glad that she's beginning to remember. Her conversation with Jonathan is great.

I can't wait to read the next part.
Please post more soon.

Tricia

Thanks for all the comments guys!!!!!

I'm really glad you liked this section, it's one of my favorites too.

As for Jonathan having his arm around her shoulders and then Lois slipping on ice... well, if you've ever landed on your rear end in the winter, you know it doesn't always matter if someone has their arm around you or not.

I'll post the next part soon!

CM[who has gotten LOTS of schoolwork done already this week and hopes to get more done so she can play next week even though it's finals]