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Posted By: Lynn S. M. FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 07:54 AM
I know I could have milked this one into a tear-jerker; but if you have read my other works, you know that that is not my style. I hadn't wanted this to be a wallow-fest, and so I went the more contemplative route.

As a writing exercise for myself, I wrote a companion piece in which I tried to keep the story as similar as possible to this one, except that I reversed the roles. (That is, I had had Lois be the survivor and only made changes to the story where required to maintain character consistency.) Because that story didn't prove to be as strong, and because about 90% or 95% of it is identical to this story, I am not posting it here. But if anyone really wants to see it, I would be happy to e-mail it to them privately.

As always, all feedback appreciated.

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: jackiek Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 11:09 AM
Very well done. I really enjoyed that. I feel bad for Clark, all alone now, even though he'll always have his family, it's just not the same.
Posted By: Deadly Chakram Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 11:46 AM
That was really well done. I felt so bad for poor Clark. I love how, without Lois, he is once again "lost" in the world and feels disconnected - like he did before he met her. And it's even more powerful that he has that disconnect even though he has flesh and blood family out there. Lois truly was his home and tie to the world.

I encourage you to rework the Lois piece. I don't think I've seen one of these that has Lois as the survivor, and I'd greatly be interested in reading one!
Posted By: Lara Joelle Kent Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 12:50 PM
Great piece! And I love the idea of founding a school for budding superheroes. (Clark isn't going to become Professor Xavier now, is he? goofy )
Posted By: mozartmaid Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 01:15 PM
Nice reflective piece. smile Of course, it's intrinsically sad, but also so natural with Clark's character and in describing what the pacing of his 'golden years' would be like. Nice work thumbsup
Posted By: Marcus Rowland Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 03:18 PM
I liked this - it seems a healthy reaction to her death, much better than pining for her forever.
Posted By: AntiKryptonite Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/19/11 09:53 PM
Very sweet and emotionally moving. I like how you addressed the beginning of Utopia and hinted at the details of a lifetime without having to bog us down in too much information.

A sad premise, but you wrote it like a promising prologue!
Posted By: Lynn S. M. Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/20/11 09:58 AM
My thanks to those who read my story and left feedback.

I had figured that, given the nature of the story, very few people would actually read it. I am pleased that so many have and that the responses have been so favourable. Thank you!

Jackie, it would have to be tough for anyone to to lose a beloved spouse after three quarters of a century together; how much more so for Clark!

Deadly Chakram, thanks for your encouragement to try to rework the Lois piece. If my muse is so inspired, I might give it a go.

Lara, nope. He still has all his hair. wink

MozartMaid, I'm glad you liked it despite its intrinsic sadness. (Perfect description, BTW.)

Marcus, thank you. I agree. I saw something similar happen when my dad died. I know a part of my mom died with him that day, and that not a day goes by that she doesn't miss him, but she has nevertheless learned to make a new life for herself. I think something similar would happen with Clark.

AntiK, thank you for noticing how much of Lois' life I tried to include in the story. One of my goals for this story was to show how rich her life had been.

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: DW Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/20/11 11:08 AM
I really liked this piece too, despite it being so "intrinsically sad" as mozartmaid described.

I also loved the reflective nature of the piece!

clap
Posted By: Mouserocks Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/27/11 12:53 AM
This was really, really good! I love reading sad/emotional stories (even though this wasn't really really sad, it had that "intrinsic" quality everybody seems to be commenting on). I think that sad wistfulness is what makes it so great. Really enjoyed!
Posted By: Lynn S. M. Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/27/11 12:48 PM
Thanks for the feedback, DW. I'm glad the reflective mood worked for you. One of my earlier fics also took place with Clark at Lois' grave. It was very angst-laden and not at all my usual style. Unfortunately, given its theme, it had to be that way. I much prefer the introspection of this piece to the angst of that one.

Mouserocks, 'sad wistfulness' - I like that phrase.

Thank you both for leaving feedback. smile

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: HappyGirl Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/27/11 08:55 PM
Well done, Lynn. Your idea of how aging affected Clark was both original and plausible, as was the way he faked his own aging to maintain his disguise. It occurs to me that, at least physically, Clark is now the disguise and Superman is closer to the real man. That must add to the appeal of starting over.

I imagine that he won't live for another century without finding love again, even though it's right that he should feel that way now. Despite the idea of soul mates, I can't believe that there is only one person in the world that Clark could love, but that's where my philosophy departs from the show's.

Thanks for sharing.

Happy
Posted By: Lynn S. M. Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/28/11 06:04 AM
Thanks for your thought-provoking feedback, HappyGirl.

Quote
Originally posted by HappyGirl:
It occurs to me that, at least physically, Clark is now the disguise and Superman is closer to the real man.
I hadn't thought of it quite like that, but you are exactly right.

Quote
I imagine that he won't live for another century without finding love again, even though it's right that he should feel that way now. Despite the idea of soul mates, I can't believe that there is only one person in the world that Clark could love, but that's where my philosophy departs from the show's.
I, too, dislike the whole soul mates concept. But even if one were to subscribe to it, Clark would likely fall in love again -- he would just have to wait two or three decades for Lois' soul to be reborn and to grow up. Of course, some would consider this the ultimate instance of cradle-robbing.

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: Artemis Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/28/11 11:51 AM
Great story! What everyone said.
cool
Artemis
Posted By: HappyGirl Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/28/11 07:45 PM
Lynn, I hope you've read Nan's Home series. It's based on exactly that premise, and it's excellent.

Happy
Posted By: Lynn S. M. Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/28/11 08:21 PM
Artemis, thank you for leaving feedback. Glad you liked it. smile

HappyGirl, I have not read a single word of Nan's series. I have seen posts indicating that other people think it to be fantastic; but to be honest, the sheer volume and scope of it intimidates me. I've read that people need to make multi-generational family trees and/or keep charts just to keep track of all the characters, their abilities, and their relationships to each other. I have neither the time nor the energy to read anything that involved, no matter how good it is. Maybe when my son is grown and has achieved whatever independence he is capable of, I might give it a go. But not before then.

Joy,
Lynn
Posted By: Artemis Re: FDK Moving On (1/1) - 07/29/11 07:01 PM
It's not really that hard, Lynn. You'll enjoy them. Start here: http://lcfanfic.com/stories/2000/homenan.txt
There's also a page on the Archive linked to an epub version.
I made charts because I had trouble remembering all the characters.
cool
Artemis
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