You have a good idea that has scope for further development if you wanted to expand this fic.

I wasn't sure if the title referred to the story or to the start of Lois' and Clark's relationship - maybe both

Thanks for posting it.

Corrina.

Thank you so much for the comment Corrina. I appreciate it.

I'm not a writer so its hard to put my vision into words. If anyone is interested in exploring further please feel free to go ahead.

As for your Semi Beginning question its both the title and the beginning of the relationship between L&C.

Thx again n have a good day.

Hi Seme,

I agree with Corrina. What you have written is intriguing and I would love to see more.

You might want to ask for beta readers to look over your stories before you post them. They could help you not only by providing feedback on your plot ideas but also with some of the technical aspects of writing, such as spelling and capitalization.

One thing you might want to think about is your choice of tense. Things like jokes are often in the present tense, but most other types stories are typically written in the past tense.

I just started posting fanfic here myself a couple of months ago, and I am still very much learning about things like how to indicate characters' motives and emotions, how to pace a story, how to come up with realistic dialogue, etc. But now I guess I am not the newest writer here. Welcome aboard.

cheers,
Lynn

Interesting story idea; I'd like to see it expanded, though. Since the details of the date aren't as important as the fact of it, I might not bother writing that up, but I'd integrate it more with the dialog. Sort of like:

Also, it'd be good to explore some of what Lois is thinking. She hadn't thought she'd be upset, or she wouldn't have suggested it. But now she is, and why might that be? Maybe she's not deliberately ignoring Clark, the way it seems. Maybe she's just deep in thought, trying to understand her own reactions, and not really hearing him at all.

That kind of thing. The mechanics (spelling, verb tenses, punctuation) will need to be cleaned up, but that's where beta readers and general editors are so valuable.

You've got good ideas, and that's the important part. That's talent. Everything else is skills that can be learned and developed.

PJ

Well, Seme, you may not have been a writer before, but you are one now.

You've done the hardest part, which is to put your idea down in words and publish it for others to see. Congratulations!

Yes, there are things you can learn about mechanics, and a good beta-reader can definitely help. The best way to learn to write is...to write. So you're on your way. Keep it up.

Congratulations for taking the plunge and posting that first fic!

Welcome to the boards!

I read your fic late last night but didn't take the time immediately to give feedback. Now that I have time, all I can do is echo the comments of those that posted already.

I like your idea but I think it does beg for more. I do believe you did the right thing in starting with a short. You can continue to develop this idea in small sections or you can move in a different direction.

In any case, you should be proud that you took the scary step of sharing your work. It was only about a year and a half ago that I posted my first story here. It was my first work of fiction ever and the idea of showing it was frightening.

Welcome to the ranks of the writers.
Bob

Thank you guys for the support and the pointers.