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KenJ Offline OP
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As you can see, the number of parts has increased. The final chapter was getting rather long so I split it into two parts.

comments go here


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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Hi Ken:
For this: “Yeah, there are Lucy and Jimmy’s children.” you mean they are. I would add something like "so they don't have superpowers."
Or else "Yeah, there are Lucy and Jimmy's children so they don't have superpowers."
Ever watchful beta
Artemis


History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod
Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis
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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Artemis,

Thanks! Done.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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clap Let's hope large ties and leisure suits aren't in style again too. (Just teasing you, Ken. My bridemaids each wore a different pastel dress too: peach, green, and blue. Or was it purple, green, and blue? Gosh, I really can't remember. blush )

I'm a little confused on why Hattie had dinner twice. Once with Lois (around 6) and once again with JJ (I'm guessing sometime after 9).

Right before Lois and Hattie leave the office Lois says:
Quote
“I think we just have time to go grab a bite to eat and make the meeting. Let’s hit Travaglini’s for dinner, my treat.”

Smiling, Hattie replied, “You don’t have to ask me twice. Let me grab my bags. I’ll meet you at the elevator.”
Then when JJ asks:
Quote
“...Had anything to eat?”

Shaking her head she said, “No, not yet. I was going to call for Chinese.”
Was Lois only joking about taking her to dinner at Travaglini’s? huh Or was there some reason Hattie forgot that she had already eaten?

Also, at one point you mentioned "Jim". Um... here:
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Jim asked, “What are you going to do?”
Who's Jim? If it's JJ, it's the only time you refer to him as Jim, so it sounds like you're referring to someone else. Also, can you refresh my memory on what Jimmy is currently up to, since Lois and Clark became editors. I can't believe JJ would want to work in the same office as his dad. shock

I wonder if Hattie is going to share her time discovery with the police. I wonder if the bomber is sending out ticking-time bombs in take-out food on a restaurant within ten minutes of the theatre district. No, surely the MPD would have figured that similarity out by now. I'm surprised they didn't pick up on Hattie's time discovery. Sounds like MPD is sorely missing Henderson. You've got me chomping at the bit with this mystery. I love a good mystery. laugh


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Hattie and Lois are a good team, nice to see both of them interacting with Graham Kerr! It was interesting that Graham didn't hear Lois talking about scanning the cars for bombs...

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“Huh? Oh. What Lois suggested got me to thinking. Where were the bombs placed? An oven timer or an egg timer will only count down so many minutes. Most will go up to an hour. What if the timer was always set to a particular time? I need a map of the city.” Looking around and spotting the gofer she shouted, “Frank! I need a city map, large format, in the conference room in five minutes!”

With a stricken look Frank looked around as if lost and because he knew how Hattie could be, said, in a tremulous voice, “I’ll try.”

“Don’t just try – do it!”
Oh, I've worked with people who pulled demands out of thin air. It never fails to bother me.

Quote
It was actually closer to ten minutes before Frank had the map and brought it to the conference room. When he dropped it off, Hattie said, “Thanks, Frank. Now, could you be a dear and bring me a cup of coffee?”
Urgh! Now she's asking him to get a coffee? My admin background is rearing its head on this one! Get your own coffee Hattie. grumble

The timing thing makes a lot of sense, but there has to be something driving him set the bombs off at this particular time.

Yummy mystery! Please sir, we all want some more!


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Virginia,

Thanks for the FDK!

RE: Why did Hattie have dinner twice?

Answer: Because I did some editing to add explanatory notes and didn’t proof. thumbsup

I have also gone through the entire document looking for Jim and Jimmy. Changing all referenced to James Olsen Junior to JJ and leaving James Perry Kent as Jimmy. thumbsup

You love a mystery? Well, actually, there probably aren’t that many that don’t. This story has been percolating around in my mind for a while and when you posted the ‘A’ plot challenge, it just had to get written. evil


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Morgana,

Thanks for the FDK!

RE: Graham Kerr hearing about the superheroes scanning the cars.

Ans: He obviously did, however it was Lois and Hattie talking about the superheroes as other people. They are always careful that way. cool

Don’t feel too bad about Frank. He is the gofer, after all. That’s his job. clap

There will be nine posts instead of eight and the plot will thicken considerably before we have a final resolution. evil


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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Quote
I'm a little confused on why Hattie had dinner twice. Once with Lois (around 6) and once again with JJ (I'm guessing sometime after 9).
Obviously she likes spending time with Jimmy Jr., and so will use any excuse possible.

Also, maybe she got really hungry from her work out, but I still like my first theory better.

Although since Ken claims he fixed up the story, maybe I have to figures out some other theory. But, I still like my theory.


John Pack Lambert
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You still have three references to Jim starting in about the 5th paragraph after we get to the second day at the office.

I have to say I was thinking Metropolis Theatre District would be like proadway, full of lots and lots of places that do live acts.


John Pack Lambert
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John:

If you are talking about the two lasagna dinners they were for Graham.

Since Hattie is very much like Lois, it would not surprise me if dinner was light fare.

Uh, after one of my workout sessions I'm ravenous!


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Quote
Originally posted by KenJ:
RE: Why did Hattie have dinner twice?

Answer: Because I did some editing to add explanatory notes and didn’t proof. thumbsup
Thanks, Ken. This:
Quote
“It went well, in fact I finished earlier than I expected. Had anything to eat?”

Nodding, Hattie replied, “Yes, Lois and I had dinner at Travaglini’s.”

He shook his head and said, “Shoot, and I ordered pizza. Would you still like a slice?”
makes more sense. I hate it when I do a last minute edit, before posting only to shoot myself in the foot by forgetting a minor detail like this. I completely understand. laugh


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Virginia,

Thanks for your understanding. I hope that faux pas didn't detract from your enjoyment of the story.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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JJ seems remarkably not excited to learn how these bombs were delivered. Even if he is really tired, I don't see him cutting Hattie off from telling him her theory on how the bombs were delivered. That is just too pressing to put off for the night.


John Pack Lambert
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KenJ Offline OP
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John,

I think that after 21 hours anyone would be thinking about sleep especially after spending the last four in a state of nervous excitement. Even Hattie was feeling the let down as her body let down on the adfeniline.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj

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