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Missing Lois (Season 5) - TOC

Chapter 6: The Return of Ultra Woman - 12 Parts

Disclaimer: Inspired by the characters created by Jerry Siegel & Joe Shuster and portrayed on the Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman television series, developed by Deborah Joy-LeVine. Many thanks for the above-referenced writers and to the other writers on the show for their inspiration. The plot of this story is entirely my own.

To refresh your memory, Chapter 5: Part 12 and Chapters 1-5 Synopsis

Part 1

Clark had dropped off Sam at Lucy’s. She had greeted him with her usual slap in the face. Then she had asked him to leave. No, told him to leave. He sighed. It had been wrong of him to taunt Kal with his wife’s possible infidelity, but he hadn’t been thinking straight. Clark knew it was his own Lois that Kal was watching at his house, but when he had opened the door and seen them kissing…

He hadn’t known Lois had cut her hair and would be dressed in Lucy’s clothes. Had part of him thought it was Lucy that Kal was kissing, not his Lois? Perhaps a little bit at first. Then when Lois had jumped away from Kal and he had seen that it definitely was his Lois, Clark had completely lost it. Lois had been driving him crazy with these smoldering looks every time he – well, Mr. Amazing – saw her, which was why he had kept trying to avoid her and kept insisting on a good distance between them.

Clark knew if he kissed Lois again, he would not have the ability to stop. So, from now on, no more visits from Mr. Amazing. He was too dangerous for her to be around. Lois was too fragile a person for a man like him. Too breakable. Too addicting. Though she had been pleasant and admiring of Clark and his writing talents, she had shown no interest to that side of him whatsoever… until this morning on the way to the shower, when Lois had looked at Clark as a piece of meat. A piece of juicy tasty, freshly barbequed meat. He swallowed. A part of Clark thought Lois had figured it all out and was torturing him on purpose, because it sure felt like torture having her look at him like that as she had talked about showering. A shiver danced down his spine. Whoa. Lois was one hot woman. But she was married and he had already been burnt once by a married woman.

Clark winced. Not only had he unintentionally been burned by Lucy, but his guilt over his part in the affair had doubled… tripled… quadrupled – exponentially increased since he saw Kal kissing Lois. Lois and Kal had only kissed. He knew that Lois had partly kissed Kal because she had been suffering from dimension confusion and a part of her thought that Kal was her Mr. Amazing. Nor had she known to be watchful of the soul mate pull. Because of all that and because his own anger, Lois had rushed into a snow storm and almost died, Clark had forgiven her. Quickly and more easily than he might otherwise would have. His guilt in the whole matter seemed far worse.

Yet, it was difficult for Clark to get the image of the two of them out of his mind and he knew it would haunt him late at night for a long time to come. He swallowed the bad taste in his mouth. Lois, while guilty of kissing Kal, was forgiven. A part of him still had difficulty forgiving Kal for his actions, even though Clark knew he and Kal’s wife had not only kissed but done a whole lot more. Guilt stabbed Clark like a kryptonite sword, knowing full well the pain he himself had inflicted, and would in the future inflict, upon the unknowing and innocent Kal.

Clark had not tried to stop himself from falling in love with Lucy at the beginning; he couldn’t help himself. It had just… happened. He was half in love with her after she had walked into the newsroom and kissed him in front Lana that day last February. None of Lana’s kisses had ever seared through him like that one kiss had. Even after Kal’s Lois had told him that she was not the Lois from his dimension – with whom he had fallen in love long before meeting Lucy – and that she was in love with and about to be married to Kal, Clark had still not been able to stop himself, even though with every fiber of his being he knew it was wrong. He remembered learning that it was wrong to covet another man’s wife. And while Lucy hadn’t been Kal’s wife until weeks after she had arrived pregnant on his doorstep this past summer, Clark had known Lucy was not his to love. But that still had not stopped him from looking at her whenever he got the chance, from wanting to spend as much time with her as he could, and from desiring her in a way he knew he should not. If he had tried harder in the beginning not to fall in love Lucy – as a substitute for his missing Lois – and to fight against the soul mate pull, perhaps the affects of that pheromone perfume would have been easier to fight.

Though he and Lucy might laugh and joke about their one night together from time to time, Clark knew neither of them truly found the anguish they had caused funny. Neither would Kal should he learn of the affair. Nor had Clark spoken lightly when he had told Sam that Kal would be justified in killing him after learning what Clark and Lucy had done to her husband. Clark felt – now that he had a taste of the fraction of the pain that Kal would suffer upon learning of their deceit – that he would deserve any punishment lashed out at him by Kal. Clark would take the punishment willingly, hoping it would ease some of this burden that made heavy that small part of his heart which still loved Lucy. Clark never would complain about its discomfort or toll or heaviness as he knew it was a burden of his own making.

Clark had already decided that he would be – should be – alone for the rest of his life; he did not deserve happiness after his actions caused so much grief in others. It was for the best. Lois and he could be friends. She had been miraculously healed after the car accident. But he couldn’t expect miracles every time she got hurt, and with his luck there was bound to be another time.

He took a deep breath and slowly flew down to the Topeka airport. Clark never wanted to live through Lois’s death ever again. It was his fault for scaring her with his temper and for her getting struck by lightning.

Clark quickly spun into his business suit and walked into the rental agency. They weren’t thrilled at renting him another car – the first one, rented the previous day by Lois, having been totaled. He convinced them to compromise. He wouldn’t press charges against them for using his stolen credit card to rent a car to Lois, and he wouldn’t pay for the damages. Eventually, they agreed.

He went outside to the payphone to call Lois at his house. The phone rang once too often and Clark was about to fly over to see what was up, when she finally answered.

“I’m sorry, Clark, but you never said you’d be calling from the airport. I didn’t know if I should answer it.”

“Just wanted to let you know that I’ll be there in an hour, if the roads aren’t too bad.”

“I’ll be here, packing my suitcases.”

“I’ll see you, soon.”

“Clark!”

He paused. “Yes?”

“Thanks for helping me out. I know I’ve been nothing but a thorn in your side since coming back to Metropolis. I promise to be better.”

“You’re welcome, Lois. See you soon,” he said, hanging up. He smiled. That was the nicest she had been to him since Superman flew her home.

***

When Clark arrived at the house an hour later, it was quiet except for the sound of her sobbing. He was upstairs in an instant. She wasn’t in her room. He walked slowly down the hall and found her curled up into a tight ball on the bed they had shared. He swallowed, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

“Lois? Are you all right?” he whispered.

She nodded, which seemed contradictory to her body language. Rolling over, she set her head in his lap and continued to cry, her whole body wracked with sobs. Clark’s heart cracked a little with each sob. He had done this. He had hurt her this badly. It was his fault. He should have never let them become close, but they had. He wrapped his arms around her, wishing he had the courage to tell her the truth, to apologize.

“I’m sorry, Clark,” Lois cried, wiping her nose on her arm. “I just came in here and I realized that this was… and I was reminded of him and how… and now it’s over… it’s gone… how something so precious, that had never meant to be… that never was really there, is now gone… gone forever…” Aguish overcame her and the sobs took her over again.

Clark could do nothing more than hold her and rock her. He rested his cheek on the top of her head, allowing a tear to escape.

He had felt, and was still feeling, the loss and pain at the ending of their relationship as well.

He missed her, too.

***

Clark woke up on the bed a while later. Lois was gone. He must have fallen asleep at some point. She had cried and cried and cried, until she had cried herself to sleep. He didn’t think anyone could have so much love inside of them to release in the form of tears. He had curled up next to her, continuing to hold her, not wanting to let her go.

Sitting up, Clark stretched and glanced at his watch. Ten twelve. He walked down the hall, following the sounds of typing that had drawn his attention. He found her sitting quietly at the desk in her room, typing away on her laptop. She closed it as soon as he entered.

“Ready to go?” he asked. He realized belatedly that his question sounded a bit gruff after what had just happened between them. He hadn’t meant it to. But he doubted, knowing what he knew about Lois, that she wanted to discuss her emotional outpouring from earlier. Especially with Clark Kent. They didn’t have that kind of friendship. If she did, he would be more than willing to listen. More than willing to hold her again. More than willing to do anything she asked. More than willing.

“Do you mind if I leave some stuff here? I don’t really feel like lugging home all my shorts and tank tops, right now.” She sat back in her chair. “It’s actually a very pleasant room.”

“I’ve always liked it.”

“This used to be your room?”

Clark nodded. “You’re welcome to come and use it whenever you like.” What made him say that? She wasn’t going to want to ever return here again.

“The quiet is peaceful. After having someone watching me non-stop for almost four years, it’s good to be alone.”

“Sometimes, it’s nice to get away from the noise of the city.”

“It’s a good place to write, too,” Lois said, unplugging her laptop and returning it to its case. “Thanks for putting up with me, Clark.” She smiled weakly at him.

His heart bent. “My pleasure,” he replied, which after he said it sounded bad. Why was she being so nice to him? Clark went to pick up her suitcases.

“I’ve got it,” Lois said, jerking it out of his hand. It flew out of her hand and across the room.

“I thought you packed.”

“I did, too.” Picking up the suitcase, again, she set it on the bed and opened it. It was stuffed full of clothes and a few framed photographs. “That’s odd. It felt empty.” Lois closed it again and stared at it for a minute. “You carry it.”

Clark picked it up. It felt like a full suitcase to him. Not a heavy suitcase; he had never felt one of those. He picked up the other suitcase as well. “I’ll just load the car. You see if you’ve forgotten anything.”

When he returned, he found her wandering around his parent’s old bedroom. “Looking for something?” he asked.

“Your room. There isn’t any personal stuff. Photos, notes, anything except in my room. I thought this was your home away from home.”

Clark looked away, uncomfortable.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry,” Lois said, coming to him and setting her hand on his chest.

He took a deep breath and set his hand over hers for a moment, before removing it from his chest. Then Clark smiled. “Of course, you wanted to pry. You’re Lois Lane.”

“Ouch! Is that what you think of me?”

“It’s what makes you such a good reporter. It’s what makes you who you are.”

“So, Mr. Kent,” she said skipping down the stairs. “Why aren’t you at home at home?”

“Because I only just moved in this fall. I haven’t had time to make it my own.”

“Oh,” Lois replied. “That makes sense. So, the next time I come here, you’ll have put in some personal touches for me to snoop through?”

Clark laughed. “If you insist, before you need to pick up your spring clothes.” She wanted to come back. His heart soared, before reality shot it out of the air again.

“Oh, I definitely insist. Otherwise, it’s like you don’t live here.”

“I don’t live here,” he said, setting the alarm code and shutting the front door.

“Oh, right. This is your Fortress of Solitude.”

He chuckled. “You heard that, did you?”

Lois nodded.

“Well…” Clark made a buzzer sound. “This isn’t the Fortress of Solitude.” He stepped off the front porch and trudged through the snow around the corner of the house. She followed. He pointed to an old tree house in one of the trees. “That’s my Fortress of Solitude.”

Lois laughed and started to climb up the trunk of the tree, swinging easily up to the fort.

“Lois, don’t climb up there. It’s old.” Clark climbed up after her. He found her looking through his old marble collection, wooden swords and guns, and arrowheads.

“Here’s stuff to snoop through.” She grinned. “Now, I feel like I’m getting to know the real Clark Kent.”

He squatted down next to her. “You know, you’re the first girl to enter the Fortress, with the exception of my mom.”

“I like your Mom. She’s cool.”

Clark looked at her for a moment as if she was crazy, before the light bulb went on. “Oh, Martha Kent, Clark’s Mom. I like her, too. She reminds me of my mom, only different.”

“Different, how?”

“More outgoing. More worldly. Maybe my mom was those things too, but I never had a chance to really get to know her. She died when I was ten. And when you’re ten, your mom is still just your mom.”

“Yeah,” Lois agreed. “I lost my mom when I was ten, too. She ran off with my little sister and a plastic surgeon. We never did see eye to eye. I never saw them again.”

“I know. Sam told me. Your sister, Lucy, is an actress in Hollywood.”

She stared at him. “What?”

“Lucy Lane is an actress in Hollywood. Nothing major, but a couple of speaking parts.”

Lois climbed down out of the tree house; Clark jumped down landing with a solid thud next to her.

“Shall we go? I don’t want to miss the one o’clock to Metropolis.” He started walking toward the four-wheel drive rental until he noticed she was still standing under the tree house.

“How do you know that? About Lucy?” Lois asked, when he walked back to her.

Clark held out his hand with a slight smile. “Clark Kent, Investigative Reporter.” He dropped his hand after she just stared at it. “I’ve been looking for you for over three years, Lois. There isn’t much I don’t know about you. Shall we go?”

Lois slowly followed him. “Is that all I am to you? A story?”

Clark wanted to take her into his arms and show her otherwise, but sighed instead. “I’m hoping I am a friend and a colleague, once we make sure Luthor isn’t coming after you anymore.”

Lois didn’t respond and he had a strange feeling that wasn’t the answer she was looking for. She sat quietly in the car as they drove through town.

Clark decided to fill the silence with a guided tour.

“There’s the city hall. The bank. Maisie’s Diner – I took Lana there for ice cream on our first date.”

“Stop.”

He slowed the car to a stop and looked at her.

“I need to get some things at the market. Do you mind?”

Clark pulled the SUV up to the curb and turned off the car, looking at her curiously. What couldn’t wait until they got back to Metropolis?

“I’ll be right back. You can wait.” Lois smiled weakly, grabbing her purse and getting out of the car. A few minutes later, she returned with a bag, bulging with a big item.

He x-rayed the bag and then turned away, embarrassed. Feminine items. He swallowed. Oh.

She pulled a Double Fudge Crunch Bar out of the bag. “You want a bite?” she asked.

Clark shook his head and pulled back out onto Main Street. He was quiet a minute as she munched on her chocolate bar. “Joe’s Feed. Smallville High,” he continued with his guided tour.

Lois turned and looked at him. “Do you really think he’s going to keep coming after me?”

“Luthor seemed to go through a lot of trouble to hold on to you. Do you really think he won’t?”

“No. You’re right. Lex will keep coming until one of us is dead. He doesn’t like to lose.”

“From what I’ve heard, neither do you.” Clark smiled.

“Oh, think you’re so smart, Smallville. Think you know everything about me, do you?” Lois sneered at him.

“Pretty much.”

She glared at him. “What’s my favorite ice cream?”

He shook his head with a grin. “Low ball question? Double fudge ripple with chocolate chunks.”

“OK. That was an easy one.” She thought for a moment taking another bite of her candy bar. “The first boy I ever kissed?”

“Stan Dunkel, in kindergarten. Stan’s now married and has three kids, lives outside of New York and has a pet grooming business he runs with his wife, Darlene. He says, Hi, Spunky.”

“Ha-Ha.” Lois gulped. “I bet you just made that up.”

“I don’t lie, Lois.” For the most part. To everyone else, he was honest. To Lois…

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Oh, now I know you’re lying, big boy. Everybody lies. You’ve lied to everyone about Lucy and who she is.”

Clark sighed. “Lucy isn’t above lying; actually, she’s one of the best liars I’ve ever met.” He glanced at Lois, wondering which Lois would win in a lying contest. “So, technically, she did most of the lying. I couldn’t let it out that she was Superman’s sister-in-law, now could I?”

“That’s not exactly what she is, is she?” Lois asked.

“Lucy finds it easier if she thinks of the two Supermen as twin brothers,” he explained. “It’s easier if she knows where the line is.” That darn line, it had become his friend these many months. He had bumped against it until his head hurt. And a couple of times it had twisted around his neck like a noose. But there it would remain as he knew it should. Since his Lois arrived, he had encircled himself with the line. He needed to protect his Lois from what was on the other side.

“Wait a minute! Lucy needs to draw a line between herself and our Superman? Is she drawn to him like I was to Kal-El?”

Clark glanced at her briefly and then refocused his attention on the road, while he mentally kicked himself. Him and his big mouth.

“I wonder if she’s ever crossed that line? Clark? Has she? You’re Superman’s best friend, well?”

Clark took a deep breath and exhaled, refusing to answer, staring straight ahead. Ignoring her.

“Was he able to resist her, I wonder? Knowing she was destined to love Superman. Love Superman.” Lois sighed. “They’ve been hanging out together much longer than the hour Kal and I spent together. Oh, my God! They did fall in love. That’s why he got so mad yesterday. With my hair cut like hers and wearing her clothes, he thought for a second I was her.”

Lucy was going to kill him. He wished that Lois would just shut up.

“But our Superman can’t have her. She belongs to Kal. He knows that. She’s going to have to return to her dimension one of these days. That’s why the time machine is out at your Smallville place, isn’t it? To take her home. I wonder why she came here in the first place.” She thought for a moment, but then shook her head. “How romantic. How sad.” She sniffed, a pout forming on her mouth. “Oh, now I feel sorry for him. I shouldn’t have... Oh!” She swallowed, a tear running down her cheek. “That means he never really…” She covered her mouth. “I should never have run away.” She slouched down in her seat, pulling out another chocolate bar -- from her purse this time -- and biting into it. It was one of the chocolate bars he had given her at Christmas. She sniffed again, bringing her knees up to her chest.

Clark glanced over at her and felt like someone punched him in the stomach. “Lois?”

“He never really loved me, did he?”

No, Lois, don’t think that, Clark winced. He really was the world’s worst boyfriend. “Of course, he does.”

Lois glanced over at him, tears running down her cheeks. “Stick with the truth, Smallville. It looks better on you. Why would he love me?”

Clark pulled the car over to the side of the road. This wasn’t a conversation to have while driving. He turned and faced her. “Why wouldn’t he love you? You are so beautiful, the sun rises in your eyes. You are so intelligent; everyone at the Planet is giving you such a hard time because it’s the only way for them to even the playing field. You are so witty; you make me laugh when I feel like crying. You are so brave and gutsy that you’d thumb your nose at a crazy crime boss, daring him to come after you. You are so tough, that you wouldn’t let Lex Luthor steal your hope and sanity while locked up as his prisoner for over three years.” He sighed. “You are so wonderful…”

She smiled at him through her tears, reaching out and cupping his face in her hand. “You are sweet, Smallville.”

He turned the car to the road, pulling back out. “And, no, you shouldn’t have run off,” Clark murmured. “But don’t pity him. He doesn’t deserve it.”

Lois looked at him with a raised brow. He concentrated on the road. His knuckles were almost white from gripping the steering wheel.

“You’re angry at him, Clark. Little goody two shoes from Smallville is angry at his hero for crossing that line. Did your image of him get a little tarnished because he showed himself to have a heart, to be human, to be frail, and have desires just like the rest of us?”

“No!” he snapped. “I’m angry at Superman for having scared you. For making you run off in the middle of a wild electrical snow storm, for almost getting you killed. When I had thought you had died…” Clark stopped speaking, his voice choked with emotion. He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. Lois Lane – not just a pregnant Lois – was his red Kryptonite. Think of the line, he told himself.

Lois did not speak for a minute. “Clark,” she whispered. “Is that why you sat by my bedside all night?”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“And I’m sorry, too. I like you. Really, I do. Sometimes, I wish I had met you first. But I think the Fates have me linked with Superman.”

Clark scoffed and shook his head. “There is no destiny, Lois. You make your own decisions.”

“I think you’re a little jealous of Superman.” She smiled.

He sighed. “At times, I wonder what my life would be like if Lucy had never introduced us.”

“That bad, huh? Always having to live in a hero’s shadow.”

“It isn’t all that bad.” Clark smiled. “Without him I would never have met you.”

“Aren’t you sweet?” Lois hooked her arm with his and leaned against his shoulder. “Screw destiny. Maybe I’ll fall for you.”

He laughed with a shake of his head. “Lois, I’m not asking you to fall for me. Actually, it would be better for you if you didn’t. I’m a jinx. Cursed when it comes to love.”

“Oh?” Lois mused. “You don’t believe in destiny, but you believe in jinxes and curses? You are one big enigma, Clark Kent, and I’m going to figure you out.”

“Lois, I’m not worth figuring out. Why don’t you work on you for a while? See who you are and what you want without a man in your life.”

“Hmmm. You really don’t want that spotlight pointed in your direction. Wonder what it is you don’t want me to find out?”

Clark rolled his eyes. There was no middle ground with this woman.

“So, what went wrong between you and Lana? Actually, I was kind of surprised not to find you two married. I had read about your engagement in the paper before Lex blinded me.”

“You saw that?” He was still surprised that she remembered.

“So, tell me. What happened?”

Clark sighed. He wondered what she would think of the truth.

“Oh, is it still too painful?” she asked, taking another bite of her chocolate bar.

“It’s been almost a year now, Lois. And I don’t know what’s sadder, that it didn’t hurt when she dumped me or that I almost married someone who I didn’t miss when she was gone.”

“You didn’t miss her at all?”

Clark shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I guess I did a little. But more the companionship, having someone to talk with, than her in particular.”

“You don’t have any friends? You’re such a nice guy. I can’t believe that.”

“Close friends, no. Lucy’s my closest friend at the moment and she’s heading back to Kal soon. So, I won’t even have her for long.” Clark sighed.

“Tell you what. I’ll be your bosom buddy. You can talk to me about your problems,” Lois volunteered. “But on the flip side, you’d have to be mine. And I tend to ramble on and on and on. But strictly off-the-record there, Mr. Investigative Reporter. I don’t want to be your Lex Luthor source.”

“You don’t want to tell the world about hubby’s dirty dealings?” he asked, glancing at her.

“Of course. But I’m going to write those stories. Not you. Or, if Gareth won’t let me touch the story with a ten foot pole, being too close, I’ll be your source as long as I get to do the work with you. Partners. But not on the personal stuff.”

“Same goes with me. Off-the-record on the stuff I tell you. Because this Superman stuff is above top security clearance.”

“The tabloids do seem obsessed with the Man in Blue. I almost don’t know what to believe.”

“With the tabloids, it’s best not to believe any of it.”

“I hate the tabloids as much as any other self-respecting journalist, Clark, but you’ve got to admit they do have a grain of truth to some of their stories.”

“You’re not going to sell me out to Leo Nunk or Randy Goode's Dirt Digger, now are you?” he asked.

“Good? Ugh. No, he’s already approached me twice to do a tell-all spread about life with the reclusive billionaire.” Lois shivered. “I want what I say to mean something, not be someone’s gossip.”

“Then I guess you’re a trustworthy friend.” Friend. That wouldn’t be crossing the line. Blurring it, maybe, but not crossing it.

“So, tell, tell. Why’d she dump you?”

He groaned. She was persistent. “You really want to know? Fine!” he snapped and then he glanced at her. “You.”

“Me? You didn’t even know me a year ago.”

Clark grinned. “But I did. You walked into the newsroom and kissed me right in front of my fiancée.”

Lois leaned away from him as her brow furrowed. “I’ve never kissed you, Clark.”

“I know. It was Lucy, impersonating you.” He chuckled.

“What was she doing in our dimension? Why would she impersonate me? Why would she kiss you? She’s married to Superman, isn’t she? Not Clark Kent.”

“Oh, right. Almost forgot about his role. Yep. Lois Lane and Superman. That’s why Lana dumped me.” Clark smiled.

“Hardy har-har. You got me. If you didn’t want to tell me you could have just said so.”

He doubted that very much.

Lois crossed her arms, stuck her bottom lip out in a pout and stared out the front window.

*** End of Part 1 ***

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Chapter 6: Part 2