Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic Trusting Me, Trusting You 3:Trail (28/29)

Eric was parking his car at Phoebe's care facility when his cell rang. "Menzies."

"It's Scardino. What can I offer him in return?"

Him? The alien? "Anything."

"*Anything*?"

"Anything."

"You don't have the authority to offer him anything."

Scardino *had* grown a backbone. "The President has offered Daitch and his team of scientists anything if they can save the earth."

"Will that offer extend to an alien?"

Eric heard the slight emphasis on the word 'alien' and felt shame burn through his conscience. "Of course it will," he snapped.

"I have your word? Whatever I promise, you, the government, the President, will deliver?"

"You have my word."

"I won't be meeting you," Scardino said. "I'm going to Kansas. Get me a private flight leaving from the Metropolis Air Base in half an hour."


Part 28

Clark sat atop an ice-capped mountain and looked down upon the cold and bleak world where winter reigned for most of the year.

He felt empty.

Empty of hope.

Empty of answers.

Empty of understanding.

Last night ... last night had been a disaster. Clark couldn't believe the extent of his bumbling ineptitude. It could not have been more of a debacle if he'd purposely set out to ruin everything he had with Lois.

He hadn't even managed to protect his secrets. Now she knew some of what he'd been subjected to in the cell. The taunts. The ridicule. The insults. The derision. The ruthless attack on the essence of who he was as a man.

He'd dreaded it more than the physical beatings. When darkness had fallen outside, the door of the cell had opened, and Moyne had stood there.

If he'd been holding a rod, Clark had felt a measure of relief. It had meant that his torment would be physical.

But if Moyne hadn't been holding a rod, Clark had known that far worse would be coming. Words. Pictures. Graphic descriptions. And overriding it all, the constant assertion that Clark was an animal who wasn't worthy to even think of such things.

Lois was so beautiful. So pure. So perfect. So trusting.

If he had agreed to her suggestion ... to begin kissing her and allow things to progress ... so much could have gone wrong. What if he hurt her physically? What if he did something that allowed her to see through the veneer of his counterfeit humanness and glimpse the animal that lurked underneath?

His body had been so tempted. His mind had been so torn. His heart had been so afraid.

||_||

Lois hadn't managed to fall asleep until well after midnight, and consequently, she awoke late and feeling bedraggled. The house was silent. She found a note on the kitchen table: 'I have gone to search for Mom. I'll be back around lunchtime, Clark.'

She made breakfast and took it to the computer, trying to convince herself that this was a good opportunity to get a large slab of the first chapter written.

Twenty minutes later, her toast and coffee were cold, and she had written one line. One poorly constructed sentence that was nothing more than a stain on her computer screen.

Thoughts of Clark racked her mind.

His pain plagued her heart.

Last night ... had been a mistake. She'd felt pressured into doing *something*. When it had become obvious that Clark wasn't responding to her words, her instinct had been to try action.

That had been a big mistake.

Lois started to sigh, but it turned into a sob as misgivings drove deep furrows through her conviction that love and time could heal Clark. When he'd been in the cell, she'd believed that freedom would unlock more than his physical imprisonment - she'd thought it would unshackle him from all the effects of what he had suffered.

It hadn't.

In some ways, he was still a prisoner.

And for the first time, Lois had doubts that anything could truly liberate him.

Time, she reminded herself. Time and love and patience.

That plan had some merit, but it didn't even begin to answer what she should do when Clark came home. Should she pretend nothing untoward had happened?

If she did that, what would happen at bedtime?

Would they go to their separate rooms?

Clark needed time - she knew that. But would time alone be enough?

If she backed off, would he slide further away? If she stopped pressuring him, would he take that as her agreement that a physical relationship wasn't possible for them? Would he believe that she no longer found him attractive?

The sound of a motor came from the driveway, and Lois stood from the desk. She ran up the stairs and to the front window. An unfamiliar car came to a stop next to the big cedar, and Daniel Scardino got out.

Lois's heart sank into a stomach turned to quicksand.

Scardino's appearance could only mean one thing; the Daily Planet reporter had printed - or intended to print - another story, disclosing more details about the alien.

Lois turned from the window as Scardino began to walk along the path to the front door. She flew down the stairs and opened the door before he knocked.

Scardino's face was puckered with anxiety. He hadn't shaved, and his dark stubble contrasted with his pale cheeks. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong.

Lois laid her hand on her chest, hoping to calm her pounding heart. She didn't want Clark to come. Whatever had happened, she wanted to be the one to tell him. She wanted to have the chance to prepare him.

"Come in," she said to Scardino.

He didn't answer verbally, signalling that he knew she knew this wasn't a social call. He stepped into the living room, looking like a man carrying the burden of the world.

"Tell me," Lois said.

"There's a massive asteroid on a collision course with the earth," he said, his words rushed and quivery. "It could destroy everything. Those not killed immediately will face insurmountable changes to the environment."

"Why -" Lois finished her question silently. ... are you telling me? She knew. They wanted Clark to save them. They'd tried everything else and figured he was their only chance.

"Do you think he would be willing to at least listen?" Scardino said desperately.

Would he? "What do you want from him?"

"I want to ask if he would consider helping to divert the asteroid."

"You mean by *throwing* something at it?" Lois asked incredulously.

"I don't know," Scardino said as he ran an unsteady hand across his forehead. "EPRAD has tried everything humanly possible. They can't stop this. We need his help."

"When?" Lois asked. "When is this collision supposed to happen?"

"Eleven-sixteen tomorrow morning."

They had less than twenty-four hours. "How do you know?"

"Menzies."

"Menzies knows the alien didn't die in the cell?" Lois squeaked.

"Rhodes, the reporter from the Daily Planet, told Menzies that Moyne's letter said he was hunting down the alien. Menzies kept Moyne's name out of the article, but it was enough for him to suspect that the alien hadn't died."

And it was a completely different story now that they needed him, Lois thought. "So Menzies came to you, and you folded," she said scornfully.

"No, I didn't," Scardino said. "I reiterated that the alien is dead. But then Menzies told me about the asteroid."

"And you believed him?" Lois exclaimed. "It didn't occur to you that it might be just a story to wangle the truth out of you?"

"I believed him," Scardino said. "It seemed to me that he was telling the truth."

"He's been an agent for thirty years," she said scathingly. "If nothing else, he should know how to lie convincingly."

"He was scared," Scardino said. "He tried not to show it, but he was scared. He looked like a man who knew he was facing death."

Lois scrutinised Scardino. He was telling the truth. And as much as she didn't want to admit it, her gut said that Menzies was telling the truth, too. "There would be conditions," she said.

"Name them," Scardino said quickly. "Anything."

"On whose authority?"

"The President of the United States of America."

"I'm assuming this will become public? If it hasn't already?"

"There is to be an announcement at five o'clock today."

"But EPRAD scientists can't have been the only ones to notice it."

Scardino grunted as if he hadn't thought of that. "I assume EPRAD has asked for the cooperation of those with credibility," he said. "And anyone else is easily dismissed as a crackpot."

"So it's possible this is known outside of EPRAD?" Lois questioned.

"Possible," he admitted. "But I don't know anything about it."

Lois paced a couple of steps as her mind worked feverishly. When Clark knew about this, he was going to face a monumental battle - his innate penchant to protect warring with his crushed self-confidence. Which would be stronger? Before last night, she would have been sure the former would prevail. But now ...

"If he helps you, Clark would have absolute discretion regarding what is made public about him - if anything," Lois said, spinning to face Scardino.

"OK."

"If Clark should choose to do this secretly, those who know will be kept to an absolute minimum and nothing of his part in this will ever be revealed publicly."

"Menzies knows and trusts the head scientist at EPRAD. Together, they could choose one or two others who can be trusted."

"Should Clark want the alien officially acknowledged, you will ensure that his life as Clark Kent is protected and that there is never even a hint of association between the two."

"The public thinks the alien is dead."

"I'm sure Menzies can come up with a plausible cover story," Lois said acerbically.

Scardino nodded his assent.

"Menzies will do whatever is necessary to keep people like Rhodes from ferreting into the past."

"We can do that," Scardino said. "I know the agency has established a relationship with the Daily Planet's editor."

Lois shot him a caustic look questioning why the *relationship* hadn't prevented the alien story from being printed. However, she had more important considerations right now. "Should Clark choose to go public, there will be official recognition from the government, EPRAD, and everyone else with any influence that he is welcome to live on this planet. That he is not, and never will be, a threat to our safety. That Trask and Moyne and the agency got it very wrong when they imprisoned him."

"Naturally."

"And no details of the depravity of his imprisonment will ever be made public."

"The records have been destroyed."

"There will be an apology for the years of imprisonment. And an official statement that Clark did not kill the two agents."

"Of course," Scardino said. "And there is also the matter of compensation."

"Compensation? You mean financial compensation?"

"Yes. Name a figure."

"I'm not sure Clark -"

"A man of his age has usually established a career and is on the way to financial security," Scardino noted.

"OK," Lois said, thinking about the computer Clark had bought her and wondering again how deeply it had eaten into the money from Wayne Irig. "That sounds fair."

"How much?"

"You'd have to talk to Clark."

"All right."

"Furthermore, you would provide everything needed to corroborate his identity as Clark Kent - birth certificate, adoption papers, everything."

Scardino nodded. "Anything else?"

"Yes," Lois said. "You will locate Clark's mother and find out what happened to his father."

"I've been making inquiries," Scardino said.

"I'm not asking for inquiries," Lois said. "I'm telling you that you *will* find her."

He nodded. "Anything else?"

"That is my list. Clark, of course, can add anything else."

"Of course." Scardino glanced around the room. "Is he here?"

"No. He's out looking for his mother."

Scardino grimaced. "When do you expect him home?"

Lois looked at her watch. "He shouldn't be much longer than an hour."

"I need to return to Metropolis to inform Menzies personally," Scardino said. "You can contact me via the security cell phone."

"I figure you will want Clark to come to Metropolis?"

"Yes," Scardino said. "Our best chance is a collaborative effort between Clark and the scientists who have been working on this thing around the clock."

"Clark Kent can't be seen entering EPRAD," Lois said.

"Will you come to Metropolis with him?"

"That's up to Clark - but probably, yes."

"He can fly long distances?"

"Yes."

"With you?"

"Yes. If we come, we'll fly to Metropolis."

"You can't come to the base like that," Scardino said. "There is too much surveillance. Too many radars."

"OK. We'll fly to my father's home and drive my Jeep to the EPRAD base."

"I will have the details in your file. I'll get your vehicle passed so you get through security without any difficulties."

"My presence is to remain strictly confidential. There must be no public connection between the alien and Lois Lane. The fact that I worked on that operation is to be wiped from all records."

"I think that has already happened," Scardino said.

This was sounding like Clark's decision had been made for him. "I haven't agreed to Clark doing anything," Lois said. "I've agreed to alert him to the situation."

"Do you think he will help?" Scardino asked pitifully.

"I don't know," Lois replied.

"Is he bitter? About what happened to him?"

"About what we did to him?" Lois corrected. "No. Not bitter. Damaged. Hurt. Broken. That about covers it."

"We got it h...horribly wrong," Scardino said.

There was nothing to be gained from belabouring the point now. "I'll talk to him."

"Thank you," Scardino said. "That is far more than we deserve."

"It is," Lois said.

"I have to get back to the airport," he said. "An Air Force jet is waiting for me. I'm here as Jack Gumbleton, presidential aide, checking out possible rural towns for a presidential visit next year."

"You were disguised? When you were at the airport?"

"Yeah. It's in the car."

"Why did you visit this particular farm?"

"My tyre went flat at the bottom of your driveway."

"It did?"

A fragile smile emerged through Scardino's anxiety. "Slow leak," he said. "I need to get out there and change it."

"No loose ends, huh?"

"No." He held out his hand. "Thank you, Lois," he said. "Without you, we would have no hope."

Lois took his hand. "I haven't guaranteed Clark will do anything," she said.

"Without you, there would be no Clark to ask."

Scardino moved to the door. He opened it and then turned back to Lois. "I hope to see you later today. If not ..." He enclosed her in the briefest of hugs. "... thank you - for showing me how this job should be done."

Lois was surprised by the hug and stunned by his words. However, he didn't wait for a reply but turned away and hurried down the path.

She went up to the bedroom and waited until Scardino had changed his tyre and driven away. "Clark?" she said. "Clark, I need you."

She strained her ears, hoping to hear a footstep or a swish of air. She heard nothing. She decided to call more loudly.

"Cl -"

There was a sudden gust, and Clark walked through the doorway. He crossed the room quickly, clasped both of her arms in his hands, and looked down at her with concern creased through his expression. "Lois?" he said breathlessly. "What's wrong, honey?"

It was the 'honey' that crumbled the staunch pillars of her resolve. Lois collapsed into his wind-cooled chest, and Clark's arms wrapped around her.

"Are you OK?" he murmured into her hair.

She backed away after only a few moments, refusing to allow herself to wallow in the comfort of his embrace. "Yes," she said. "I'm OK. But we need to talk."

||_||

The cogs of Clark's mind had ground to a halt as Lois had outlined the details of Scardino's visit. Now, he felt as if every brain cell had fallen into an undignified heap somewhere around his throat.

They *wanted* him.

They had come to him to ask for his help.

"You don't have to do anything," Lois said quietly.

"Yes, I do," he said. "If the asteroid crashes into the earth, I might be able to survive. But even with my help, you might not. And my mother won't have my help."

"What can you do?"

A few of his most resilient brain cells staggered to attention. "I'll go now. To see if I can spot this asteroid. I need to know what I'm up against."

"Clark!" Her hand gripped his arm. "I'm scared. I'm scared for you."

"I'll be all right," he said. "You kept telling me we'd be all right. And we will be."

"What if ... what if it's too big? Too -"

Clark slid his fingertips across her temple and into her hair. "Lois," he said as his hand came to rest on her neck. "I need you. We're together, remember? I can't do this without you. Please don't think about what might happen. Please help me."

She nodded and blew out a shivery breath. "Tell me what you want me to do."

"While I'm gone, I want you to think this through. You know Scardino and Menzies. You've worked as an agent. I need you to decide how we can help without jeopardising our future." He gently squeezed her shoulder. "Please help me," he said. "I can try to face the asteroid, but the thought of dealing with people terrifies me."

"You trust me to make the decisions for you?"

"Completely."

"All right," she said. "But there's one decision we have to make together."

"OK."

"Do you want the people to know that the alien is alive and willing to use his strength to try to save their planet?"

Clark shook his head. "I don't want anyone to know."

"I understand why you feel like that," Lois said. "But I'm not sure it's the best way forward."

"Why?"

"There's a high risk of someone finding out. I doubt EPRAD astronomers are the only ones following this."

"I ... I'm not sure I could ..."

"If the 'alien' makes an appearance - alive, powered, and cast as the hero who is our only hope - that will contradict the Daily Planet story and eliminate any lingering negativity. You being willing to use your powers to save the earth rather than dominate it will reduce Trask's original supposition to what it was - the ravings of a lunatic."

"What if they say I only saved Earth so there will be something for my fellow aliens to come and conquer?" Clark said, not able to keep the shadow of resentment from his tone.

"I'm thinking that perhaps this doesn't need to be the last appearance of the hero."

"No, Lois," Clark said. "I cannot be some sort of flying circus act."

"I'm not thinking of a circus act," Lois said. "I'm thinking that there are a lot of times when your strength and your speed could save lives. You could make a stand against all the evil that was perpetrated against you. But you could do it by fighting for good." She smiled and ran her hand down his jaw. "Because there is no other way Clark Kent could do it."

"You mean that when something happens - a fire, or a car wreck, or a flood, or a robbery, or a kidnapping - I could fly in and help?"

"Exactly," Lois said with a smile.

Clark shook his head. "I'm fast," he said. "But I can't be everywhere at once."

"No one would expect you to be everywhere at once," she said. "No one would expect you to save everyone. But every life saved would be using your special abilities in a way that would help the world to see you as you really are and would help you to understand that you have a place on this planet."

"I couldn't, Lois," Clark said. "I couldn't openly let people see how weird I am. And I'd have no life. People would come gawking at the farm gate, hoping to get a glimpse of the alien freak."

Lois shook her head. "No," she said. "You wouldn't do this - any of this - as Clark Kent. We would keep the alien and Clark Kent as two completely separate entities. One is a Kansas farmer, human, regular guy, son of Martha and Jonathan Kent, and married to Lois Lane. The other is a super-powered visitor from another planet."

Clark couldn't see how Lois's proposal could be possible. "I can't do that, Lois. I have to try to divert the asteroid. But that's all."

"I think you should choose somewhere - perhaps Metropolis, because you were imprisoned there. I think you should confine most of your rescues to that city. That will show goodwill. It will also mean you can still have a life here on the farm. Your mom and I will never be seen with the alien. We won't go to Metropolis unless we visit with Clark."

"Lois, the people of Smallville might not read the Daily Planet, but there is no way they could miss hearing about an alien in Metropolis. When they read that the alien was captured seven years ago and that Moyne was one of his guards and that he escaped a week ago - it's not going to take them long to make the connection."

"Moyne wasn't mentioned in the news article," Lois said. "We can be vague about how long the alien has been here - let them think he arrived on Earth just a short time before his capture. And we don't have to give specifics about how long he was imprisoned."

Clark gave a rueful smile. "You're already talking about him as if he's someone other than me," he said.

"He would be," Lois said. "You would still be Clark. He would just be what you can do."

"Do you really think it could work?" Clark said. "Do you really think that people won't recognise me?"

"We'll make a disguise," she said. "But we don't have to worry about that now."

Clark still couldn't glimpse the future Lois was painting. "No," he said decisively. "I think it would be better if no one knew except a couple of people at EPRAD. They can tell the reporters that they fired a missile at the asteroid."

"There's another reason why you should consider doing this openly," Lois said.

"What?" Clark asked, hoping she wasn't about to raise something dire that he hadn't even considered.

"Wherever your mom is, there's a chance that she reads the papers."

The force of Lois's words hit him. "You ... you mean, perhaps *she* could find *me* instead of the other way around?"

Lois nodded eagerly. "If she sees a report about a strong, super-powered alien saving the world, she is going to know it's you - whatever your disguise. If she's being held somewhere, she can try to call out to you. At least she'll know you're all right."

"But if she reads the papers, she'll think I'm dead."

Lois patted his arm. "Which is why you should do this openly. Then, she'll *know* you're not dead, and she'll know you are trying to find her."

Some of his lifelong aversion to displaying his abilities melted away. He could stand the scrutiny, the questions, the scepticism, the prejudice if it meant his mom wasn't worried about him. "All right," Clark said. "Tell them I'll do it in a disguise. Tell them there is to be no link between Clark Kent and the alien."

Lois smiled. "I know you can do this," she said.

"No, I can't," Clark said. "Not unless you help me."

"You know I will always be here for you."

"Thanks." His gratitude felt like such an insignificant token after everything she had done for him. "Lois," he said. "I'm so sorry about last night."

"It was my fault," she said quickly. "I was too impetuous again."

"It wasn't your fault," he said. "I let the newspaper story and the things I heard get to me. I let them bring back all the feelings from the cell." His worded apology wasn't enough. He had to show her that he meant it. "When this is over, would you mind me moving back into the double bed with you?"

She grinned. "That would be wonderful, Clark. I missed you so much last night."

He had pined for her. "And ... and perhaps we could continue the 'therapy'?"

Her grin widened. "I would love that."

More than anything, Clark yearned to be with Lois now. To have lunch. Talk. Maybe even go to the bedroom for some afternoon therapy. "I have to go," he said glumly. "I need to try to get a look at this asteroid."

"How long will you be?"

"I don't know. Half an hour, maybe more."

"Do you want me to call Scardino and begin to work out the details?"

"Yes." He put one hand her cheek. "And Lois," he said. "I know we decided that the alien and Lois Lane have nothing to do with each other, but I need you to come to Metropolis with me this time. I can't do this without you."

She put her arms around his neck. "I'll be there," she said. "Will you promise me something?"

"OK."

"Promise me you won't try to deal with the asteroid now. Promise me you'll come back."

He hesitated. "The further away it is, the less I'll have to push it off course."

"You're sure that *you'll* have to do it? You couldn't launch a missile at it?"

"That's a possibility. But I think they would have already tried that."

She nodded, but there was still fear in her eyes. "Hold me?" she said.

Clark held her, breathing in her scent and allowing her essence to permeate through him. When he eased away, he looked into her still-anxious brown eyes. "I'll be back as soon as I can," he promised.

"OK."

He turned away and sped out of the farmhouse, into the sky and beyond.

||_||

Lois dialled Scardino on the security cell phone, feeling as if Clark's entire future rested in her hands. But she also felt a sense of calm. She could do this. More importantly, Clark could do this.

Perhaps this was what he was born to do. To be a guest on a planet that wasn't his own, among people who were not his own, and help them.

Lois clung to that thought. Because if it were Clark's destiny to be a super-powered hero on the earth, he would be all right when he met the asteroid. He would be all right. And the people of Earth would be all right.

"Hi," Scardino said.

Lois could hear the whir of the car engine in the background. "We've decided," she said. "It is to be done publicly but with a disguise. No one else is to know the connection. We'll need a place to make the switch."

"Will you be with him?"

"Yes."

"Once you're here, we'll need someone to oversee the ... transition. Your former colleague works as a security guard at the base. He knows everything; he helped clear the cell at the compound."

Former colleague? At the compound? It had to be Shadbolt. He *knew*? "Ah ..."

"We want to limit numbers," Scardino said. "He seems ideal. He's there. I'm sure we can trust him. There will be a lot of attention on the higher-up - there always is. I'll liaise. No one will think to check what a security guard is doing. And because the records have been destroyed, his work history won't be known."

But how would Clark feel about having to face Shadbolt? He would probably accept it if it meant one less person knew of his dual identities. "OK," Lois said.

"See you soon. And thanks. To both of you."

Lois hung up her cell.

Shadbolt knew. He'd helped Scardino arrange the cremation of Jonas and agreed to the pretence that it was the body of the alien.

Menzies knew.

Scardino knew.

Three people.

Could the secret be kept?

She trusted Evan. Scardino had covered for them when they'd escaped. Menzies? If he was committed to keeping the secret, he would be a powerful ally.

He had influential connections. He could bluster his way through almost anything. He'd protected Moyne. Would he now protect Clark's secret with that same vigilance?