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#76916 01/28/11 12:36 AM
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Thanks for reading and letting me know what you think--it definitely adds extra enjoyment to what's already one of my favorite things to do!

#76917 01/28/11 01:22 AM
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Quote
adjusting his glasses instead of shaking her hand because she was too busy to really look at him and he was too taken aback to step forward
this is an excellent description of the classic Clark conundrum: how to hide Superman while trying to get Lois to notice Clark?

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He liked to think that Clark Kent had made some difference to Metropolis, even if it hadn't been on a par with what Superman had done.
aww... of course he made a difference! /hugs Clark/

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But then, reading Lois had never been a matter of noticing what she did do; it was all about what she *didn't* do.
Very clever observation.

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as if someone had taken a key and released her from a solitary cell. Clark was back.
ah, I get the imagery now. Well done! thumbsup

Bravo! Thoroughly enjoyed this fic! You had so many wonderful details that tied together moments in the show and here translated into well-drawn characterizations.

Thanks for sharing!! clap


Reach for the moon, for even if you fail, you'll still land among the stars... and who knows? Maybe you'll meet Superman along the way. wink
#76918 01/28/11 07:00 AM
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Oh what a wonderful little story!! I loved seeing this from Lois' point of view! I love how she finally admitted to herself how she felt about Clark - nicely done!


LOIS:I don't like you.
MAYSON: Really? Oh god, that is such a relief - I don't like you either.
LOIS: That makes me feel so much better
#76919 01/28/11 07:11 AM
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Beautifully written and very insightful. Thanks for sharing your writing talent with us.

Happy


This *is* my happily ever after.
#76920 01/28/11 07:51 AM
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Very nice and insightful! I really liked the "added bits"! clap clap clap

laugh

#76921 01/28/11 08:23 AM
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Pulitzer
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Another fantastic episode adaptation. Your stories add such richness to the original scripts!

One minor error you may wish to correct before you archive the story... You have Clark walking around Metropolis until dawn and then, a few paragraphs later and seemingly only an hour or so later, Martha is making dinner.

You have done so well with the two episode adaptations you've written already, I can't wait to read your first completely novel L&C story. (Yes, that *is* a hint! wink )

Joy,
Lynn

#76922 01/28/11 02:04 PM
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Thanks so much for commenting!

I tried to weave several abstract analogies to their relationship throughout just because I love every facet of it, no matter the angle. Don't we all? smile

I was hoping the title wasn't too vague and did tie in with the prison theme from the title of the episode.

I love these characters so much, so thanks for your encouragement on the characterizations! smile1 Lois was fun to write; she's complex, so I hope I did her justice.

I went ahead and had Martha make breakfast--thanks for pointing that out. One of the biggest problems I have is keeping my timeline straight--I'm not a time-oriented person at all.

Thanks for commenting!

#76923 01/28/11 04:10 PM
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Merriwether
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I love the way you've taken scenes from the show that we know well yet added to them. It reminds me of reading the novel after seeing the movie version. You get more insight and a richer picture. Nice job!

Joan

#76924 01/28/11 06:19 PM
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I enjoyed your embellishment on the episode very much! And the symbolism of "separate cells" made perfect sense to me. Great job! clap


EvelynC
#76925 01/29/11 03:24 AM
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Awww, that was perfect! I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for posting.


"Hold on, my friends, to the Constitution and to the Republic for which it stands. Miracles do not cluster and what has happened once in 6,000 years, may not happen again. Hold on to the Constitution" - Daniel Webster
#76926 01/30/11 09:32 AM
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Thanks, guys!

I try really hard to just put what I think the characters are thinking or feeling in the scene into my story. A few people have been encouraging me to branch out a bit more with longer stories--yes, I got all the hints smile --so I might try that shortly, but mostly I love visiting the episodes and giving them all the depth I see.

I'm glad the name worked for you. I think titles are really important, at least to me, setting the story in perspective.

Thanks for reading and commenting!


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