Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK Starwood in Aspen 3/3

Wonderful, vivacious finish! Your writing style is so splendous to read. You manage to look at everything in a new light.

Nqoire

That was incredible! No, more than incredible; it was absolutely inconprehensible in how amazing it was. I want, no *need* a sequel! I want to know what Clark says, what Lois says to Dan, and how Dan feels getting a stilleto in the face... okay, so that last comment was just my wishful thinking, but you get the idea. I do not think I'm alone on this point either, Lynn, so don't hold out on us!



-Jo

I really liked reading this story. You certainly surprised me by letting the night and almost the next day out, so we knew as little as Lois did what had happened between Clark and Mayson. Lois's logic was super, as was their fight.

Your description was sensual, but I am glad that Clark could be patient because Lois tends to panic afterwards.

But you simply can't leave it here. You must write the sequel real soon. And of course nfic also

There is two points I hoped you would think about: First, you should tell earlier during the story at least something (not all) what went wrong between Lois and Clark, that you tell their situation *before* the story isn't enough. Secondly, I find it hard to believe that if Clark isn't guilt-stricken about Mayson's death, why would he take distance from Lois, when she tries to explain her behavior. So I hope, that you had another reasons for it.

Lynn

WOW! This is excellent.

Tricia

Okay, I've just read this over in nfic - and I agree; this would have to be edited for PG13. Lynn, I hope you will send this version of the story to Annesplace's nfic section!

Wonderful, wonderful scenes! That argument between Lois and Clark had me breathless throughout. I could see the frustrated yearning beneath the surface for both of them - and when it exploded into outright desire I almost forgot to breathe altogether. I could really see Clark losing his temper like that. And you write a scared Lois very well indeed. Does Clark perhaps have a little secret that he wants to tell her?

Regardless of these points, Lynn, I have loved this story and it's going on my Kerth list!


Wendy

Lynn,

Just to throw another opinion in there, I was actually glad you did not include the conversation between Clark and Mayson. In a way, I had been both anticipating and dreading the posting of Part 3. I felt sorry for Mayson, and no matter how many versions of the break-up scene I played out in my head, I couldn't find any that wouldn't be downright painful. I wanted to get past Mayson & Clark's break-up without actually having to go through it. (Sort of like how Clark wants Lois to know about Superman, but dreads the actual telling.) Anyway, I understand others wanted to see that scene (and I have every confidence that you would have written it beautifully), but, as for me, I was quite happy with the way you chose to write Part 3.

I will admit I was initially surprised to see Part 3 begin at the end of the next day. But, again, I can't complain. I found the way you wrote that opening scene, the fight with Lois, and our gradual understanding of what had transpired over the past 24 hours to be nothing short of brilliant!

Altogether, I loved this story, from start to finish, and I wouldn't have you change a thing. I would, of course, be more than happy to see a sequel!!!!!

- Vicki

PS - I found what I believe to be a typo. (I say this hesitantly, because the last time I pointed out an "error" in someone's story, it turns out I had merely read it wrong.) At one point, you say (of Clark) that "he covered his body with hers". Since Clark is on top, I believe it should read "he covered her body with his."

Hey Y'all -

First, let me apologize if anyone read the nfic version and had expected a PG - didn't mean to offend. I'm learning and guess I went a bit too far. Anyway, I've posted a revised PG version (with a few bits removed) as well as the nfic so hopefully that will do the trick.

Vicki - thanks for catching that type-o. Definitely my mistake!! I've fixed it 'cause that part made no sense at all!

Thanks for the positive feedback. Maybe I will go back and write some sort of "filler chapter" that covers some things you all want to see.

Thanks for reading!
Lynn

No, no filler chapters. We as fans may be interested, but in terms of the story, it's irrelevant. I'd like to see an extension, though -- maybe Clark can explain the SM factor that's been complicating things, making him run away, etc. Having him bare his soul like that would probably reassure her.

And I recognize the challenge you wrote this in response to, about Lois sitting in front of a fire in a man's shirt We should challenge you more often!

This has been quite a fun ride, and wow you certainly have a way with love scenes!

Write more soon!

PJ

Have you thought that if Clark don't tell about Superman and Lois meets later Mayson and hears that Clark drove her back, what would be she think? I mean, *then* it is too late to say that Superman flew him to Aspen.

Lynn,

I was so glad to find part three, I can't tell you. I have nothing but respect for your muse, gifted she is, but I felt like I stood on the other side of that door with Lois for a long, looong time.

Ok, here is what I love about your writing. It is unexpected. It doesn't follow from A to B to C, and I love not knowing what is going to happen next, how you make it all unfold.

So, I adored that you started us out the day AFTER. That Clark walks through the door kicking the snow off his boots, and we are as frantic and clueless as Lois. And yes I didn't really think you would commit a huge sin and have Clark and Mayson do that thing, but see previous para as regards "unexpected", still what a huge relief to hear him say that Mayson was gone. Whew!

Next- not trying to write a book here- favorite part is when Lois declares that when she gets back to Metropolis she is going to march over to *Clark's* place and just do it. Adore how he hears her right, and tries to convince her of what she said. Could hear their voices! Love that.

Last, IMHO- which you can disregard, Clark driving Mayson back and then leaving Jeep and flying... It makes sense to me that after a long evening in the cabin with the wrong woman, and an endless and awkward ride home, that our hero would be claustrophobic, and would need to get himself above the clouds. Thus leaving the Jeep and just heading straight up, clear his head, erase the horrible memories, yada yada.

Did I mention I loved this whole thing, and that I'd like for you to just get to work on something else now, pretty please?

CC-

Hi,

Great part.

MAF

Lynn,

Loved the story (and the epilogue.) Congratulations. I agree with many above that skipping to the end of the next day was a terrific plot move in part 3. The best moment in 3 for me was Clark's pressing of lois about why she hadn't slept with Dan and then his telling her he hadn't slept with Mayson.

“I didn’t sleep with Mayson last night,” he repeated softly, handing the trophy to her at last. “It’s why she left this morning.”

"Handing her the trophy" was a fabulous image.

I liked the epilogue too, as I had wanted to know more about what happened between Mayson and Clark. I still would love to see you write the scene (or scenes) when Clark tells Lois about Superman. Afterall, they're still stuck in that cabin and need to call him in at some point to get them home. Please

All in all, thanks for the treat of a very enjoyable story!

Martha