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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1 |
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Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823 |
I think I used up all my words on the beta job.
All I can say, upon re-reading, is Wow! This is a really hard chapter, both to write and to read. Lois is at her lowest here, her anguish at its most difficult point. How she lashes out at Clark and breaks his spirit is so in-character for her, and yet so hard.
Poignant and moving. Worthy of a Kerth nomination for Best Angst.
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 326
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Dec 2004
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Wow! What a powerful chapter. It was beautiful, poignant, full of angst and emotional turmoil
robinson
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837 |
Three cheers for Sarah Crawford. She brought some relief to Lois. Wow, what a chapter. But you must put all your toys back together, musn't you?  Artemis
History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod
Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3 |
Wow.
Not only does Superman have limits, Clark does too.
I understand why Lois would react as she did when Clark revealed the truth. She's hurt, she's torn, she's anchorless in a sea of loss. And she saw Clark as her touchstone to normalcy, her link to reality.
But he tore that away from her. He destroyed the myth of the invulnerable Superman, the hero who grieves over lost children and who cares deeply for his adopted world. He pulled back the curtain and let her see the man behind it, a man who is hurting almost as much as she is.
And she destroyed him.
He could have taken it if she'd asked him to leave while she thought about the whole situation. He could have accepted a temporary separation from her to let her adjust and decide what she wanted to do. But she picked up a spiked mace and clubbed his heart almost to death with those words. There's no way Clark would ever deliberately harm Lois, and in time she'll admit it.
But it may be too late for them by that time. She's pushed him farther away from him in this story than I've ever seen any Lois do. And that's a chasm that they may not be able to bridge, no matter how much she might really love him.
Franklin Hodge - bad guy, good guy, or something else altogether? I hope Lois finds out. I hope that this interview becomes a stepping stone for her to find her way back. I hope she dazzles Perry with the story and I really hope she gives Jonathan a call. She'll need someone to celebrate her triumph with, and right now she also needs a father figure. Perry's too close to her and too involved with the newspaper to really take on that role, although he's helping her a lot now, but she needs to talk to someone who understands her heart and who also knows "The Secret." Here's hoping!
Sarah is great for Lois. (Great nickname!) She's the older sister/mother/close friend/confidant that Lois has lacked for most of her life. And Lois may just tell Sarah why Clark had to leave the funeral. If she does, it might be the best thing for all concerned. She can play peacemaker between them and be Lois' advocate to Clark.
Of course, you might go in a totally different direction, and since it's your story you go right ahead. Next part, please.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 377
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 377 |
ooh, stormy! too tired to comment anymore, maybe later!
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1 |
 Too sad.  Bob
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 478 Likes: 2
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: May 2006
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All I can say is  Next part soon, please! I can't see them suffering...
Kathryn
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1 |
Iolanthe - Yep, it was hard to write ... and probably hard to read too. Thanks for your many contributions. robinson - Thanks for the FDK. I appreciate you commenting. Artemis - *All* my toys ... well no. But some of them ... definitely. Thanks  Terry - Thanks for your very in-depth FDK. I'm stunned that you put so much thought into my story. I think the revelation always has a dual factor - it affects Lois in her relationships with both Clark and Superman. As for Franklin Hodge, Perry and Jonathan - they all have a part to play, some now, some later. Your thoughts skirt enticingly around where we are heading. Glad you liked Sarah's nickname. I have to confess, it isn't my idea. Sarahg - Thanks for leaving FDK even though you're tired. Bob - Yep, it was. See below. Kathryn - Thanks for your FDK. See below. OK, now I had intended to post the next part tomorrow, but I feel bad about how many times I have left Lois and Clark in such turmoil. So ... I'm going to give my kids some lunch, then get back here and hopefully, get the next part posted. Thanks to everyone for their FDK. You've been amazing.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,947 Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,947 Likes: 28 |
“You do that, Lane.” Sarah grinned impishly, blonde eyebrows jigging. “’Cause if you don’t want him ...”
Lois couldn’t help but smile, sure she could trust Sarah implicitly and savouring that certainty. “Keep yer mitts off him, Crawf,” she warned, failing completely to inject any venom into her tone.
Sarah raised her hands in retreat and, with a breezy grin, poured the last of the wine into their glasses. What a great start  His folded arms remained between them like a barricade. Lois leant the top of her head against his chin. The obstruction didn’t budge. She registered his lack of response and began to back away, flustered.
With a blur of movement, his arms encircled her, pressing her into his chest. He held her there for one breath, then released her and backed away, out of her reach. “Thank you,” he said formally. He turned and was gone. Awwwww He *knew* he shouldn’t. *Knew* that on every level, this was stolen pleasure, but he leant forward and kissed her mouth.
She responded instantly, her hands plying his neck, her lips soft and sweet on his.
He tried to imprint the very feel of her in his memory. Imprint it so permanently, so comprehensively, he would be able to recall it at will.
He *knew* he should pull away. But he couldn’t. Not yet.
So he kissed her. Kissed her so extravagantly, he was able to dismiss from his mind that which was to come.
When she finally backed away, he mourned. Awwww and great parallel to the Superman hug “I’m Superman, Lois. I left you because there was a fire in an orphanage in Honduras and I was the only one who could save those children.” So, that's the cliffhanger you where talking about. Good thing you didn't stop there
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,122 Likes: 1 |
So, that's the cliffhanger you where talking about. Good thing you didn't stop there It was sooo tempting to leave it there ... but I resisted! Thanks for all your wonderful FDK, Michael. Corrina.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,947 Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,947 Likes: 28 |
 Michael
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