As always, thanks to Carol for all her help! And thanks to everyone leaving feedback – it really does spur me on to write faster.

From Chapter 3

For a few moments, we sat next to each other in silence, each reading the other's work. Lois had written an article on inefficiency of the cafeteria's buffet line. I was impressed by her ingenuity. I was even more impressed by her writing. She was good. Good enough that I was more than a little surprised she hadn't gotten onto the paper. Reading her article, I couldn't help but think that I could kiss the Planet internship goodbye.

I finished reading and looked over at her. She was still reading my article, but had the strangest expression on her face. Her jaw was hanging slightly open like she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Was it really that bad? Paul had been so encouraging.

She looked up at me a moment later, but said nothing, although she did close her mouth. She handed my article back to me without a word, grabbed hers out of my hand, stuffed it into her backpack and left, all without a word.

Chapter 4

My article was so bad that even Lois Lane couldn't bear to tell me how awful it was? Was that it? It didn't seem believable. I had the impression that Lois would have relished the idea of letting me know how sub-par my writing was. But what other explanation was there?

I guess it was possible that she actually thought it was good enough that she felt threatened. But that wasn't very realistic. I had read her article. I wasn't half the writer she was. And while I had to admit I didn't know Lois well, one thing I did know was that she was not self-conscious.

No, she thought it was awful and couldn't bear to tell me. I couldn't even comprehend how awful she must have thought it was for that to be the case. With a sigh, I put my article in my back pack, Paul's encouraging words from earlier nothing but a faint memory now.

I got up off the floor wondering what this meant for me. Should I just give up now? I shook my head. My parents would hate me for thinking this way. "When things are hard, Clark, that just makes them all the more worth trying for,' I could hear Mom's voice in my head, and picture Dad shaking his head in agreement behind her.

When ever I had felt like I was failing at something before, my parents had told me the story of how they had been trying for three years to get pregnant, how much they wanted a child. How they had flown all the way to Metropolis to see some fertility specialist and were told it just wasn't possible. And how on the night they came back, Dad suggested a drive to cheer Mom up, even though he wasn't feeling cheery himself. He was going to take her to dinner at Maisie's, thought seeing some friendly faces would be good for her. But they never made it, because passing Shuster's Field on that sad night, they saw something fall out of the sky and found me.

Sometimes, I wondered what the life lesson was there. I knew what my parents wanted me to see it as: "Don't ever loose hope, anything's possible.' Yeah, yeah, yeah. But what if it was more like: "Be careful what you wish for. You could desperately want a child and then instead of your dreams being answered, find yourself saddled with space trash.'

I knew my parents didn't see me that way, and they didn't feel that way, but sometimes they must have thought it, right? I mean, back on the flight to Metropolis, before the specialist told them they couldn't have kids, where they thinking, "I hope we have a little boy who can fly and burn things with his eyes'? It seemed pretty unlikely to me.

So, what if I kept striving to be a good reporter and what I got was a job working for the Smallville Press or something? Then what? I would be stuck having to pretend to be normal in Smallville. I guess that wasn't so bad. I could live with my parents so I could still be the Boy in Black.

It was reasonable, right? I mean, admittedly, when I pictured my future, it was here in Metropolis where I felt like once I got more comfortable, I'd have a little more freedom to blend in than I did back home. And I had always imagined that I'd get married some day. Not that I knew how – I mean not too many women were falling all over themselves to marry a science experiment gone wrong.

I sighed. This is what happened. It was always what happened. I had a habit, a bad habit, I knew, of sinking into thinking about my origins whenever I was having a bad day. Not that I even knew what my origins were, but I could still link everything there. I mean, as I saw it, there were two options: I was an alien whose parents didn't want me and felt so strongly about it that they sent me to another planet. In which case, I must have been one mutant of an alien. Or, I was a science experiment. Similarly, I wouldn't have been sent to the middle of nowhere Kansas if I was a science experiment they were really excited about. I must have been a failure.

Not very auspicious beginnings, either one. So, it was no wonder I was a failure now, right?

I shook my head, practically feeling my dad's hand on my arm telling me to buck up, that the world was not that bad. That I wasn't a discarded alien or a failed science experiment, but his boy, the son he never knew he wanted. I could feel Mom's arms around me, telling me that my differences were gifts. That she didn't bemoan Gramp's old couch that I had burned down when I was still learning to control things, but was thankful for a son who could lift the couch so she could vacuum underneath it.

I smiled slightly, despite myself. My parents were good at always looking on the bright side. I wanted to be like that. I wasn't sure how, but I knew that was what I wanted. So, for now, maybe I'd fake it. I plastered a smile on my face as I opened the door to the dorm. Maybe if I pretended I felt better for awhile, I'd start to actually feel better.

************************

That lasted for all of about two hours. And it wasn't much of a two hours. I spent most of it in the library working on my homework. Then I packed up my things and went to the dining hall to get dinner.

Walking inside, the first thing I saw was the small group of people I knew. I wasn't ready to call any of them friends yet, but they were the people I had spent the most time with over the past few weeks. The problem was, I wasn't even sure if I liked them, as much as that they were comfortable because I knew them better than I knew anyone else in Metropolis.

I missed high school. I hadn't been so popular as to be voted Prom King or something, but I'd had a large group of friends and had been well liked. I missed Pete and Chad now. They were good guys – both were always up for a game of basketball, but were also the kind of guys who were willing to have a conversation once in a while, if that made any sense.

The three of us got along well, and were all well liked. The only thing we disagreed on was Lana. Honestly, while I could nearly hear Pete and Chad groaning at me, I missed Lana, too. Lana Lang was my first date when I was fifteen years old. Some date – I was supposed to meet her at the Pizza Shack, but she wasn't there when I arrived. An hour later when I left, I found her in the back of the restaurant making out with Eric Williams.

To be honest, she did that sort of thing to me all the time. But I couldn't help asking her out over and over again. Because when she didn't do that, she was the best girlfriend ever. She thought I was great and wasn't too shy to tell me so. And of course, she was beautiful.

Pete would say she was only beautiful on the outside, but I knew better. I knew that underneath the bubbly, superficial cheerleader, she was a sweet girl who really cared about other people. I didn't get to see that side to her often, but when I did, it made my night. My month, really, because it was so rare and she let so few people see that side of her.

Still, the superficial side of Lana hadn't wanted a boyfriend who lived so far away when she was in college. Not that it would have mattered really. Given how readily Lana cheated on me in Smallville, I never would have believed she was staying faithful to me when we were living so far apart. Ideally, I would have convinced her to come to Metropolis, but being the bubbly cheerleader in high school hadn't really bolstered her grades any, so she was in community college. She wasn't willing to move to Metropolis to go to community college.

Or maybe she wasn't willing to move to Metropolis for me. I sighed. I didn't know, and while I missed Lana, even I had to admit I was probably better off forgetting about her and moving on.

I glanced back over at the group of people I had been hanging out with. There were three girls in this group of us – Alicia, Lois, and Maddie. Alicia was the red-head who had been so condescending about Kansas when I met her. Despite the fact that it was Lois who tended to call me “Smallville” or “Farm Boy”, something about Alicia's condescension bothered me more. Maybe it was that first conversation where Lois had spoken about Chad. She clearly had no interest in Kansas, and clearly saw me as hack because I came from there, and yet, she didn't dismiss the entire state away as nothing useful.

I had the impression that while it would take more effort to impressed Lois than if I had come from Metropolis, it was still possible. Not true with Alicia. Not that I cared. I wasn't that into red-heads.

Lois was… well, Lois. And I still didn't know what to make of her exactly, but I knew one thing. She wasn't a potential replacement for Lana. She would never be that kind of girl. Not that I wanted to date someone exactly like Lana, but maybe more like her than Lois? I wasn't sure, but at the very least, I wanted a girlfriend with a somewhat less abrasive personality than Lois.

Which left Maddie. Maddie was cute and friendly and didn't have the same anti-corn state mentality as Alicia and Lois. I sighed. I wasn't really all that attracted to her either. Was I just looking for a potential girlfriend so I'd feel like I fit in better? To get over the failure I felt like in writing?

It didn't matter what the reason was. I didn't really want to date someone just to compensate for weaknesses in other parts of my life. Besides, similar to going more public, maybe I needed to get more settled in, figure out where Clark Kent fit into Met U, and where the Boy in Black fit into Clark Kent's life, before adding another person to the mix.

“Yo, Clark,” Josh called out, thinking, I'm sure, that I hadn't seen them. I gave him a small up-nod as a hello before getting in line to get my food.

************************

I hesitated before I put my tray down. There were two seats available at the table – one between Josh and Alicia and the other next to Lois. The seat next to Lois was at the end, and therefore the most obvious one to take, but it was next to Lois. I should just suck it up and sit next to her anyway, though, right? Who cared if she hated my article?

I started in that direction, but at the last second changed course and went for the seat next to Josh instead. I'd be brave another day.

“Hey,” I said to the group as I sat down.

“Hey,” came back the unanimously unenthused reply.

“We heard both you and Lois got dinged for the paper thing,” Steve said with the emotional sensitivity of a flea.

I nodded, not sure what to say.

“That's a bummer, man,” Josh said, patting me on the arm. “Lois says your article was really good, too.”

I looked up at him, surprised. Had I heard that right? Lois had said it was good? Lois? My head turned to her to see her staring at her tray, blushing furiously.

“Thanks, Lois,” I said softly, still shocked. “Yours was excellent. Really much better than lots of things I've seen published in the Titan.”

Lois looked up at me sharply. “You think so?” she asked.

I nodded and she gave me a broad smile in return. For a moment, I forgot there was anyone else at the table with us. I forgot we were even in the dining hall. Her smile was so bright, I couldn't think of anything else.

“Well, then,” Steve said, “why'd she get dinged?”

“Maybe just cause she's a freshman,” Maddie said, throwing a dirty look at Steve. I had already gotten the sense that he was not her favorite person. “Maybe in an effort to point out how hard it is to get in, they won't let any freshman in on principle and both Lois and Clark were hurt by that.”

“I bet that is it,” Josh said. “That Paul guy was a bit pompous when announcing that no freshman had ever been allowed before.”

“Or maybe it's just cause Lois isn't blonde,” Alicia said.

“What?” Josh and I asked together. I turned to Alicia in confusion. “This is for the paper. What would it matter what she looks like?”

“Cause Paul likes blondes,” Alicia retorted.

“So there are no brunettes on the paper staff?” Josh asked.

“Well, no, but my roommate got on, and she's a freshman,” Alicia announced.

Lois head jerked up. “A freshman got on?”

Alicia nodded. “And I read Linda's article and it wasn't very good. But she's blonde and has big boobs, so…”

“Well, that's fair,” Maddie said with a sigh. “So Clark would have had a better chance if Paul was gay.”

“And Clark was blonde,” Josh added with a chuckle.

“And Lois should have dyed her hair,” I added.

Lois gave a small laugh. “I did that once. I make a pretty ugly blonde, so it wouldn't have helped.”

“And no offense, Lois, but your breasts aren't a double-D,” Alicia said with a smile. “Plus, I'm guessing you weren't willing to sleep with Paul.”

“She's sleeping with the editor?” Maddie asked, and Alicia nodded.

“Nice...” Steve said. I tried not to roll my eyes. It really wasn't any surprise that Maddie didn't like him.

“Well, if that's what it takes to join the Met Titan, I'm not so interested in joining,” I announced.

“That's good,” Lois added. “Cause I think your chances of growing double-D breasts in the next year are smaller than mine.”

We all laughed as we got up to head to our next class.

************************

“Hey, Lois. Wait up,” I called as I exited the dining hall. Our next class was together, although we hadn't ever walked over together before. To be fair, that was mostly my doing. I had a habit of avoiding Lois if I could help it – made for fewer arguments that way.

I didn't feel that way today, though. I'm not sure if it was the compliment on my writing or the way she laughed the whole thing with Linda off, but I actually wanted to talk to her today.

Lois turned around and looked surprised when she saw me, but stopped walking. “We don't usually walk to class together,” she said as I reached her.

“I know,” I said, feeling myself blush. “It's just…”

“You find me hard to deal with?” Lois asked with raised eyebrows.

I didn't answer her, not sure what to say.

“Thought so,” she said as she turned away.

I jogged to catch up with her. “I was surprised you were able to laugh at that whole thing with Alicia back there,” I said to get off the topic of why I usually avoided her.

Lois looked at me. “Me, too. But I don't know. I stopped being surprised I didn't get on when I saw your story.”

“You did?” I asked.

She nodded. “I figured if you didn't get on with that, I didn't stand a chance.”

“But you were so upset,” I said, not understanding.

“About not getting on the paper?” Lois asked. “I was surprised.”

I smiled. “You were that sure you were going to get it?”

She blushed slightly. “I know it's silly, but my roommate was sure of it. Said she could picture me being at home in the newspaper office.”

“You were sure you were going to get on because she could picture you in the office?” I asked.

Lois laughed. “I told you it was stupid. The thing is, Star thinks she's a psychic or something. I don't usually believe in that sort of thing, but, I don't know…”

“She predicted something you wanted to hear…” I suggested.

“Something like that,” she said. “I guess.”

“That wasn't what I meant anyway,” I told her. “About you being upset. I meant you seemed so upset when you read my article.”

Lois sighed. “I know. It's just… I wasn't even thinking about the Titan thing anymore. I care even less now that I know getting on has nothing to do with writing ability, but even then, I guess I was over it. It was just…” Her words trailed off as we reached the Humanities building.

“Just what?” I asked, keeping my voice quiet.

“I wasn't thinking about the Titan thing. I just… I really want the Planet internship. I'm sure you're planning to apply?” I nodded, started to understand where this was going. “I just realized I'm not going to get it,” Lois said quietly before moving through the door of the building.

I placed a hand on her arm. “That's funny,” I said when she turned to look at me. “Cause I thought the same thing when I read your article.”

“No, you didn't,” Lois said, dismissively.

“I did. Really,” I told her. “Your article was so much better written than mine.”

Lois laughed. “So neither of us is going to apply thinking the other is going to win?”

I shrugged. “The thought had occurred to me,” I admitted. “But somehow I don't see you not applying.”

Lois smiled. “Me, neither. Now I just know I need to step up my game.” With another grin at me, she turned and entered the classroom.