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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,764 |
Okay - well the answer to both problems is... Take Lois back to the Alt Universe and dump Lana in this one while you're at it  . I'm guessing they're headed to Metropolis IL? Can she please show him some of that 90s TV show so the only thing he has to go on isn't the movie *shudder*? Excellent as usual Shayne. And no the govt doesn't usually pay too much attention to orniwhatevers as the sources of leaks  . More soon please! Carol
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Loved it as usual. Sorry I'm just going to post this mini-FDK, just to see if I'm able to, because I've been unable to post on the nfic boards.
Ann
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jan 2004
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Being able to hear everything in a thirty mile radius was more of a curse than a blessing. In a city the size of Metropolis…or Washington D.C. for that matter, there was a continual din. While he was able to ignore the usual sounds, part of him had always listened for the other kind of sounds. This says so much about him. He never can turn off the sounds of danger even though he tries to ignore what he doesn't intend to respond to. The small, secretive rescues he’d done over the years had only whetted his appetite for more. Still, he longs to do more. I like how Lois' imagination was going into overdrive looking for ways out. Of course, she wonders what will happen if it is safer for Clark to stay. I like how she gives Clark the kick in the pants that he needs to help out. You can see how he is wrestling with the pain of ignoring the need for his help. If she hadn't said anything I doubt he would have stopped. Even though he helps, he chides himself that he is unwilling to let go of himself entirely and reveal to the world what he can do. Lois is phenomenal. She organizes things, making sure that she protects the patients as well as possible. She works herself to exhaustion, until it isn't clear whether or not she is a victim. With that being said, I couldn't figure out where Lois was taking him. The thought crossed my mind, "What is Illinois that he might want to see? In our world, there's Metropolis, but of course he isn't in... Oh yes, he is." Elisabeth
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Sep 2006
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This installment was just great! 
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
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“What’s in Illinois?” Clark asked, glancing at her.
“A place to stay,” Lois said, “And something you need.” Yes he going to get the suit!! Then on to Las Vegas. Hmm Las Vegas, one of the few places he could wander around in the suit and not stand out!
Framework4
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
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Hadn't thought of him buying a costume there, but it's certainly a possibility. Wonder if the quality will be good enough to stand up to the super life style?
Marcus L. Rowland
Forgotten Futures, The Scientific Romance Role Playing Game
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Blogger
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Blogger
Joined: Dec 2006
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Great Writing! I've been enjoying the story a lot, with all its twists and turns.
I just hope Agent Randel don't blaim the sugar fire as a terrorist act by Lois & Clark and up the manhunt!
Also, I double the yeah! he is getting the suit!
Linda Rose
loooong time lurker. Please excuse my inability to write a coherent sentence. I've enjoyed everyone's writing and have been to shy about my poor writing skills to post general feedback.
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Joined: Aug 2005
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Aaaah, the suit! Is he really getting the suit? Ann
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
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Welcome, Linda! Don't worry about coherence. None of the rest of us do, at least not all the time.
I like the back-door approach of having an ornithologist break the story in the scientific community. Of course, now he'll want some live pigeons, and I'm sure some goofball will want to re-introduce them to the US. Their original ecological slot has been filled by other species, and I'm not sure there are enough pigeons to allow that to happen. They seemed to require a high critical population mass for species survival back in the nineteenth century, so even three hundred thousand might not be enough. And we don't know what else has been slipping through the portals that hasn't washed up on a beach or been posted on YouTube. There might be a prehistoric predator or three lurking in the Appalachians or the Pacific northwest or the African veldt.
I wonder which of them will suggest that Lois go back with Clark? Or will Lucy get to do that? Might be fun to watch them both try not to act too happy about the thought as they try to gauge each other's reaction. But however you do it, Shayne, I'm sure it will be more than worth it to read.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Great section. Very realistic with the sugar refinery. Reminds me of a story my dad told me once.
Growing up, my dad worked at a munitions plant. One day, he had just finished talking to someone and left the room, closing the door behind him. The next thing he knew, he was flying across a 30 foot room with the door behind him most of the way. They didn't find enough of the people in the first room to bury them. The door had saved his life because it protected him from the blast. Of course, he got a concussion when he it the other side of the room, but most of the rest of the room had been trashed by the blast. Thankfully, there weren't any other volitle chemicals around.
So, Clark is 'possible' going to get a suit...This is going to be great!
Still think that the general public will be hard to convince. They have seen fake supermen and other hollywood heros for decades and so it will be REALLY hard to convince them that it is some Hollywood stunt. It would be even worse it it happened now a days, what with CGI and all...
James
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Nov 2003
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Enjoying it! Hmm after reading about Lois' thoughts , I am now thinking that maybe Clark would not be able to go back... and maybe he could strike a deal with this government or hey... maybe he could get hold of the graphic novel: Secret Identity and get some inspiration from there Anyways looking forward to which way this goes. I am hoping that Lois & Clark will end up together, wherever that might be right? 
If she had to move heaven and Earth, perhaps come back to haunt Perry and explain the story after they'd killed her, she would do it.
Waking a Miracle by Aria
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Freelance Reporter
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Freelance Reporter
Joined: Sep 2005
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I don't see that it would be particularly difficult to convince great numbers of people. In the (fairly) early days of the space program, there was an experiment done in which sodium ions were released into space in the vicinity of the earth. Large numbers of people were able to see the resulting display, over a wide area, as the ions fluoresced due to sunlight.
Isaac Asimov even wrote a sci-fi piece about it, called "Watch This Space" in which the Coca-Cola(or some generic cola) company paid someone at NASA to switch the orifice on the ion generator so it projected the company's name, in ***LARGE*** letters. Wouldn't it be interesting if Clark simply took such a generator, flew into space, and wrote "Superman" -- in cursive(!) -- in nice slow strokes? Wow!
Snave
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Feb 2006
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What a marvelous chapter! “He likes to gamble and once he sits down at the tables you couldn’t get him up for anything short of the apocalypse.” Apocalypse? Just wait and see...  Being a reporter had helped, a little. It had satisfied his need to help and to make a difference in the world, but he’d been left with the nagging sense that he had more to offer.
Being a reporter was in many ways like being a police officer. Most days, you only came along after the harm had occurred. It was rare to get to prevent a crime.
He had the power to stop them as they were happening. The small, secretive rescues he’d done over the years had only whetted his appetite for more.
Now at least he had something concrete he could do instead of simply running and hiding. A very good characterization! As long as the whole thing remained a secret, the government was going to be able to keep the passengers locked away. That´s exactly why they have to go public with the whole thing. In that case going public would once again be their only recourse. If she could convince the public of one impossible fact, that Superman was real, other impossible facts would be easier to swallow. I already can see it... a very real Superman in our real world! Just imagine it would really happen... I can´t stop grinning spinning that thought! Pilar was going to be furious, and Agent Randal was probably on his way already. Imagining their reactions almost made the risk worth it. Agent Randal will not be able to find anything in Georgia. Take it, your prey is playing cat and mouse with you... and you are not the cat!  He felt ashamed.
His entire life had been about hiding, about pretending he was normal and doing only as much as he could without risking himself.
Lois was a federal fugitive and it wouldn’t be long before police and others were on the scene, yet she was stepping forward, risking everything to help people she didn’t even know. Need a role model, Clark? “What’s in Illinois?” Clark asked, glancing at her.
“A place to stay,” Lois said, “And something you need.”
He nodded and they began to turn.
The nice thing about Clark was that he treated her as an equal partner. He was willing to fly halfway across the country on her word alone.
He had no idea what was coming. First I thought the same thing: "What´s in Illinois?" And then I saw the link to the Superman museum in the review... so finally it´s the suit! Great! Will he try to refuse? He has no chance against Lois!
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Oct 2003
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I 'm sorry that I have not been commenting on your story but I have been reading it and it is very interesting! “It’s a miracle that anyone survived at all,” she began. “In what some survivors have taken to calling hell, over thirty people have been critically injured and two have died in a
sugar refinery explosion in Augusta, Georgia.” The DIxie Crystal sugar refinery is actually in Savannah, GA where I live and my hospital (where I work) Memorial University Medical (trauma) Center actually was the hospital involved. The Medical College of Georgia (MCG) in Augusta, GA actually has the burn Center where the severely burned victims were air transported to. It was nice to see a piece of home in your story! ~Sheila
I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
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