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#50225 03/07/08 06:38 AM
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994
Elisabeth finally broke me down by going on, and on, and on, AND ON, about this story and I sneaked a peek.

It wasn't that I didn't want to read it, but I rarely read wips by authors that have burned me in the past.

I know, I know, you DID finish SWK, and you have finished everything since then...and, I am reminded, that I don't have a stellar rep in that regard myself, so...I'm sorry for my attitude. But be warned... thumbsup

(It does make me wonder about your resources with regard to the varied subject matter of your many stories. One could think that several different people wrote them, that just happened to have your same style and manner of writing. Maybe you just have a split personality...)

Can't wait for more. grovel

James


“…with God everything is possible.” Matthew 19:26.


Also read Nan's Terran Underground!
#50226 03/07/08 07:53 AM
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 144
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 144
I have read the last few posts, and I simply had to answer. There was one quote in last chapter that made a chill go down my spine.

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“Don’t talk like that in front of them.” Susan said sharply. “Get on their bad side and they can make your life a living hell.”
It made me renember quite clearly the tales my parents told me about their youth in the totalitarian system we had from 1933 to 1945. Yes, I´m from Germany. And my mother always said, there was one central sentence during that time: "Be careful what you say and to whom, or they will come and get you!" My grandfather was a victim of that system because he voiced his opinion, so my family has firsthand knowledge about it.

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You want to protest totalitarian societies, why don't you start there?
Because totalitarian systems would do what I described above. You can only protest from outside of their systems, and of course they ignore it as completely as they can. You can get reactions out of them: by giving media time to the opposition they have driven out of their countries, by meeting the Dalai Lama in public (our chancellor Merkel did that, and China didn´t like it at all!), by speaking in front of the whole world about it. By answering their rants in the right fashion... but it mostly only works with high politicians.

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There have been no more instances of terrorists killing Americans within our borders since 9/11. England and Spain have suffered deadly bombings, which shows that the terrorist enemy hasn't quit. I support a solution which keeps our society safe.
The terrorist attacks in England and Spain came from people who already lived there for a long time. Spain especially has a lot of illegal immigration from islamic countries, and it´s really difficult to control because those people come by night with small boats over the Mediterrranean Sea. Both countries haven´t changed their laws to create some "Guantanamo" or "Homeland Security". But both countries - and also mine - have in the meantime been able to uncover terrorist attacks before they were launched, and the terrorists went on their way into usual trials. No change of laws. Of course there are integration problems regarding the islamic minorities in both countries which have to be solved, but it´s not easy.

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Remember that Saddam Hussein killed an average of seventeen thousand of his own citizens each year over a thirty-year period. He ordered the poison gas attacks on the Kurds and forcibly imposed his own version of Islam on his country. There was no freedom of the press, no right to habeus corpus, no legal remedy for his murder squads. And no one was allowed to express dissent.
That was not the reason for the war against him. As far as I know, there were two reasons: 1. Oil. 2. A lie about a threat that never existed.

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And let's not forget the terrible treatment of women in Afghanistan under the Taliban. They were less than second-class citizens then - they weren't really even citizens. They were chattel, bought and sold and controlled from cradle to grave and forcibly dedicated to the service of their men.
It´s still the same, but less openly. And the taliban are still there. That´s one of the main problems with religious fanatics. You can´t get the problem solved by bombs. You have to solve the problem behind it - and that´s their whole inferiority complex because of a lot of things that happened during the last 50-60 years, also regarding Israel. But I don´t want to open this special can of worms because I would have to write books if I started one.

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And just what would you do if you were charged with the safety of over three hundred million of your fellow citizens? How would you protect the rest of us who are unable to protect ourselves? Would you try to "negotiate" with the killers or would you try to destroy them before they destroyed you?
As I wrote in the beginning of my post, I renember my parents tales very clearly. The same goes for the history lessons every German child gets. So I´m going to tell you one of these history lessons.

When Hitler became chancellor, he was in a weak position in the beginning. He was forced to make coalitions with a lot of small political parties because his own wasn´t strong enough to rule alone. Then there was something which we would call a terrorist attack today. The Reichstag (German parliament building) was burned to the ground. Hitler very quick in dealing with that. He persuaded the president Hindenburg to give him emergency powers and dissolved the German parliament immediately. The person behind the attack was presented as a socialist, I don´t renember his name (Of course he only was a scapegoat, the nazis did it themselves). But it was enough for Hitler to declare his political enemies - all democratic politicians of the country - public enemies and put them into prison without a trial or legal advice. This was the beginning of that horror time, and it could have been avoided by speaking up in the first moment when he started seizing power. I didn´t happen because the German people weren´t very experienced with democracy at that time, and then it already was too late. My grandfather is the proof to that.

Please don´t get me wrong. Of course I don´t want to compare George W. Bush to Hitler. And of course I know that it´s not that way in the United States. You can´t get imprisoned without trial and legal advice - but there are rules that make a difference between US citizens and others. There is a defense secretary who talks about waterboarding as if it is harmless and no torture. Those are first steps into a different - and indeed darker - world. We know everything about it because we had the experience with such a system in our own country - and we know how it begins. Authorities that have rights that have nothing to do with the constitution, prisons that are no mans land regarding the law... I just want to say: Fight the beginnings!

Fortunately the United States have a long standing, very stabile democratic tradition and that wonderful 2-election-periods-for-a-president-and-not-more rule. And there is an highly educated people also with a lot of democratic experience. So let me get this clear for a second time: I didn´t want to compare. I just wanted to point out some things we see very clearly from this side of the big pond, but which perhaps are not visible so clearly on the other side. I hope this doesn´t sound condescending "we in Old Europe know it better", I don´t mean it that way!

I understand the need to feel safe, but it´s possible to get this safety without breaking the constitution. The European countries are proof for that, we are able to deal with terrorists without anything like Guantanamo or Homeland Security. Of course our Intelligence agencies are working on that, but the ground rules for them are the same as for everyone. The same law for all - and it works.

End of rant - *runs and hides* peep

#50227 03/07/08 04:02 PM
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 391
Beat Reporter
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Posts: 391
I just noticed this:
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if you breathe a word of this to anyone outside this room, we have the right to throw both of you away and lock away the key.
The expression is usually "lock both of you up and throw away the key."

I've noticed various typos and other minor errors along the way. Shayne, do you prefer to receive editorial comments like that here, or via private message or e-mail?

#50228 03/07/08 07:28 PM
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 814
ShayneT Offline OP
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I'm working without a beta reader and sometimes without sleep. Private messages or e-mail would be fine. smile

#50229 03/08/08 09:10 AM
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 263
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 263
Hi Shayne,

I just started reading and caught up with the story and I must laud you on how clever the whole premise and execution has been. From the transitions in chapter 1 to the portrayal of a world without a Superman reacting to the sudden "threat" - everything has been amazing. I enjoy the rather underlying commentary that the topics are bringing about, and regardless of the varied opinions and arguments that sprout from the discussion, I think the discussion itself is key. So kudos on the subtlety wink

The way you have explained the connections - or at least hinted to the explanation through the character's theories - is ingenious. Totally things that I didn't think of as a reader, but things that fit so well that I can only smile. I was waiting for Lois and Clark to finally meet, and when they did, the way they did - shortness and all - was somehow perfect.

I too am guessing that Clark is the one responsible for the apartment clean-up and certainly hope he checked for bugs... although, maybe he isn't in the shower and is using the water noise as cover for the conversation they are about to have. Hmmmm.

I really hope the next post is coming soon!

~Sonia


October Sands, An Urban Fairy Tale featuring Lois and Clark
"Elastigirl? You married Elastigirl? (sees the kids) And got bizzay!" -- Syndrome, The Incredibles
#50230 03/08/08 04:28 PM
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 76
S
Freelance Reporter
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S
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 76
Shayne:

You said:

Quote
I'm working without a beta reader and sometimes without sleep.
I know that none of us would like to admit this, 'cos we're so hung up on this really fabulous, really tense, REALLY inciteful story which just happens to be at the ultimate cliffhanger, but --

Get some sleep; we can wait a little longer if we need to -- no!! Get back, all of you!! I mean it; I've got kryptonite... wink

Snave

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