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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,514 Likes: 29
Pulitzer
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OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,514 Likes: 29 |
Ahhhhrggghhhh.... And I seriously thought that Lois had finally guessed the truth. But she didn't, did she? Come on, Smirky...gimme, gimme, gimme a revelation! Clark needs to tell her, really! Btw... great part  I was a bit disappointed that they didn't lift off, though.
It's never too dark to be cool. 
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Joined: May 2003
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 320 |
All of Clark’s hopes and illusions crashed back down onto him as he found that his feet hadn’t lifted even an inch from off the firm ground beneath him. Arrgghh, I knew that would happen  We are not lovebirds, Lois wanted to snap, feeling a rise of fury at her partner, who was now no doubt quivering behind her. Right now, she wasn’t even sure if she felt much like even tolerating the man’s cowardice. She was too busy fighting her own terror to worry about Clark’s. Geesh Lois, give the guy a break Lois was surprised at the shock of pain that darted through her heart at the thought that they might have hurt him. See deep down, you really do care... Despite the serious circumstances, Lois was tempted to roll her eyes. Like Clark Kent could do anything to help her, but he was right about one thing—he’d be in big trouble if it weren’t for her. She thinks smugly Clark looked at her blankly at that, and Lois sighed, wishing she had her hands to gesture her meaning. “You know…no, well, super stuff, okay?”
Clark stiffened at her words, his eyes widening as he pulled away and stared at her. “What?” his whisper was almost harsh.
Did Lois know?
Lois wanted to scream. Was the man really that dense? She had enough to worry about without having to deal with a terrified tagalong who couldn’t see a brick wall if he ran into it!
She leaned in, speaking even softer into his ear, and her warm breath brushed against the side of his neck. “Don’t you dare call him, Clark.”
She saw his brow smooth at his words and the smallest bit of color came back into his cheeks—probably from embarrassment, Lois thought. “Oh. Of—of course, Lois.” Good tease Besides, this was Clark Smallville Kent, the innocent Boy Scout with wide blue eyes and an open expression. When Bureau 39 had nabbed him, it had been as bad as kidnapping a little kid. It was no surprise he was a bit shaken up. His whole world had been turned on end. A gentle reminder that this is the classic clark. And yes, it does help with this story as pointed out in a previous post The poor boy looked more the farm boy than ever, especially with his hair mussed the way it was and the smear of dirt over one chin from his struggle in the alleyway. She frowned at the memory of that. Nervousness from Kent was one thing—it was normal—but what had happened there was more than just nervousness—it had been downright, utter, complete fear, and had brought Kal-El’s face to mind faster than a speeding bullet. He had been in a sheer, blind panic.
Why? Come on Lois! Wake Up! “We want you to warn him, too,” McPheron continued. “This Boss of ours no doubt has a bone to pick with him, and has the means to do so.”
Kryptonite. The word hung between them, unspoken, yet clear.
“Finally, there’s something we found of Superman’s that I think he might want,” McPheron said, standing. Hmmm, still not sure we should trust him. And who is the Big Boss??? Good chapter doublel
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Oct 2003
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Okay...I cannot believee that you just left us hanging here! Maybe I can! “Don’t worry, Clark,” Lois said, whispering herself, though she wanted to kick herself from falling into the he’s-whispering-so-I-am-whispering trap. She leaned in slightly, actually bumping his arm with her own. “Just don’t, you know, do anything…sssstupid, okay?” she emphasized, and hoped he picked up the hint.
Clark looked at her blankly at that, and Lois sighed, wishing she had her hands to gesture her meaning. “You know…no, well, super stuff, okay?”
Clark stiffened at her words, his eyes widening as he pulled away and stared at her. “What?” his whisper was almost harsh.
Did Lois know?
Lois wanted to scream. Was the man really that dense? She had enough to worry about without having to deal with a terrified tagalong who couldn’t see a brick wall if he ran into it!
She leaned in, speaking even softer into his ear, and her warm breath brushed against the side of his neck. “Don’t you dare call him, Clark.”
She saw his brow smooth at his words and the smallest bit of color came back into his cheeks—probably from embarrassment, Lois thought. “Oh. Of—of course, Lois.” I thought Lois had figured him out here. I was halfway hoping that she had. Why don't he just tell her, een though I cannot stand the fact that she is so condescending toward Clark and treats his kindness as weakness. “Finally, there’s something we found of Superman’s that I think he might want,” McPheron said, standing. What is it exactly that McPheron has that belongs to Superman? Get back here girl! 
I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,883
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,883 |
All of Clark’s hopes and illusions crashed back down onto him as he found that his feet hadn’t lifted even an inch from off the firm ground beneath him. AAAGGGGHHH! No! Death to Smirky! Ahh, well. I'll live. I suspected this might happen. God, they're both terrified. If only they could confide in each other. Stop that, curse you, Lois snarled at the quivering girl in her head. She wouldn’t think about that now. Now, she was nothing. A machine of justice, with no past… fantastic Kal-El.
She didn’t see Clark there. She saw Superman, pressed against the wall as he tried to get away from the guards as if he could vanish against the white walls around him. His face was pale and terrified, his eyes blank with memories of his own. Please, please, please???? You know what I'm asking for, Smirky. Lois saw the motion and lifted her chin. “I’m not going anywhere without Clark.” Thank God, she's still protecting him. I was afraid that she was so annoyed with him and so wrapped up in Superman that she'd might not worry about him so much. Ok, I am breathing properly again. These guys may, *may* be ok. I may just live until you post 33. Maybe.
lisa in the sky with diamonds
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,058
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Well you fooled me too. I though she'd figure it out. Poor Clark, she doesn't have such a good opinion of him. Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 544 |
Great part! Still hoping for a revelation soon, though!  My guess is that the crime lord is Lex Luthor. And the ending of this chapter was great--left me wondering what was going to happen next. I sure hope that these guys really are on their side, they could use some help!
Silence is golden.
Duct tape is silver.
~Saw it on a T-Shirt.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Beautifully written as always, Rachel. Even so, you'll have to forgive me for not quoting. This story is bringing back all my years of frustration at Clark's lies to Lois, and Lois's contempt of Clark. Gaaaaahhh! I want to shake them both!!
But I love your brave Lois, the Lois who will protect Clark even if she despises him (which I so wish she wouldn't do). Then again, Clark, as in Clark, hasn't given her too many reasons to love him, has he?
Horrible A-plots don't inspire enthusiastic reviews from me. Ah, Rachel, if you only knew how many more or less horrible comic book stories I've had to endure just to get a smidgeon of romance out of them, a few panels of sweetness and tenderness and love between Superman and Lois.... No, I can't help it, I'm not an A-plot junkie. For all of that, I can see that your A-plot is splendid.
For now, though, I'm awaiting "better times", as we say in Swedish, better times between Lois and Clark. Please, Rachel?
Ann
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Joined: May 2006
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 1,065 |
Wow, I honestly think this was one of your better written chapters. You did a really great job on piecing it together. I hope you are happy with the product because I know as a reader I was. I was a bit upset at first that she didn't find out but by the end of the chapter I understood why you did it and I think in the end it is better. She hasn't quite come to accept Clark yet and is only now feeling things for him (if ever so slowly). Now though... I am totally curious about what they have of Superman's? Hmmm I can't wait for more.  Thank you for sharing your wonderful talent with us.
Angry Clark: CLARK SMASH!
Lois: Ork!
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,662 |
For all those wondering, the "Boss" he's talking about is the crime lord they're going after. And maybe they have something found in Smallville years ago?
I think, therefore, I get bananas.
When in doubt, think about time travel conundrums. You'll confuse yourself so you can forget what you were in doubt about.
What's the difference between ignorance, apathy, and ambivalence?
I don't know and I don't care one way or the other.
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Joined: Dec 2005
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 365 |
Smirky... .... ..... @#$%&^*!?!?!?!  Clark's panic attack nearly made me cry. And despite my monumental irritation with Lois, I really appreciate that she feels protective of him. Although I'm not sure it's not just because she subconciously recognizes him as Superman. Ann, I usually agree with you about Clark lying to Lois, but I think his continued reticence to let her in on the secret is perfectly understandable here. He loves her, after all, and he feels himself to be less than a man at the moment. It was bad enough that she dismissed him as a coward when she'd seen him as Clark Kent, but to have to shatter her illusions of the superhero she loves would be the final blow for his extremely fraile ego right now. And there's th fact that he thinks he's "protecting her". Unlike most other instances when he had got this notion embedded in his addled pate, this is not as lunkheaded a conclusion as it seems, considering that even Lois conceded that nobody should know of her friendhsip with Superman as she could be used to get to him. Anyway, Smirky, really looking forward to chap 33!  R-E-V-E-L-A-T-I-O-N!!!! R-E-V-E-L-A-T-I-O-N!!!! R-E-V-E-L-A-T-I-O-N!!!! 
“Is he dead, Lois?”
“No! But I was really mad and I wanted to kick him between the legs and pull his nose off and put out his eyes with a freshly sharpened pencil and disembowel him with a dull letter opener and strangle him with his own intestines but I stopped myself just in time!”
- Further Down The Road by Terry Leatherwood.
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Joined: Sep 2005
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Blogger
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Blogger
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 37 |
Hi!
Another great chapter!!! I'm very impressed with how you portray Clark's "post-traumatic" symptoms. It is heart wrenching and so believable. I'd sure like to see Lois find out Clark is Superman soon?? Keep up the good work! I check often for new chapters and when I find one it makes my day!!!
G. Kuhn
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 234 |
Hello, all! Thank you for all the reviews. They really help with the muses! It looks like this next chapter is going to quite certainly be done by early afternoon on Thursday, or perhaps even earlier, by the looks of things right now... <crosses fingers> Now, to the reviews... A general apology for the fact that Clark is still "grounded." I tell you, I was gnawing on my fingernails knowing the disappointment that would bring, but that was just how it demanded to be written. I hope you liked how it went anyway. doublel wrote:
Geesh Lois, give the guy a break Yeah. Poor Clark. Lois is scared, and when she's scared she armors up like a rhinoceros beetle, and in this case she's left Clark on the outside. Still, she *was* keeping an eye on him, at least. Sheila wrote:
...Why won't he just tell her...? He has tried to, once. In the elevator, remember? He's scared, but especially since getting back to Metropolis he hasn't had time to do *anything* really--not even talk. Hopefully things will be getting better in the L/C category soon... TOC wrote:
For now, though, I'm awaiting "better times", as we say in Swedish, better times between Lois and Clark. Please, Rachel? I like to take my time about things, guys. Sorry about the impatience and stuff with the revelation, but there you are. Thanks for sticking with this anyway (especially you, Ann!)! I promise, the nice, protective Lois from the earlier chapter is not gone, and soon she'll be showing her head. And even though Clark is scared, he's going to be popping out of his shell soon enough as well. Just curious, though, Ann. What exactly is an A-plot? Lady_Mirth wrote:
Ann, I usually agree with you about Clark lying to Lois, but I think his continued reticence to let her in on the secret is perfectly understandable here. He loves her, after all, and he feels himself to be less than a man at the moment. It was bad enough that she dismissed him as a coward when she'd seen him as Clark Kent, but to have to shatter her illusions of the superhero she loves would be the final blow for his extremely fraile ego right now. I'm glad you understand, Lady Mirth! Poor Clark is terribly out of balance right now. I always hated the lying Clark myself, especially in normal canon of the comics and the movies where it doesn't even seem to *bother* him. Trust me, if I was reading this fic instead of writing it, I'd probably be right beside Ann ranting. I tried to iron that out as best as I could because of that, so I'm glad Clark is at least somewhat justified to some of you readers out there. I sympathize with the guy. jo_jo_da_crow wrote:
Wow, I honestly think this was one of your better written chapters. You did a really great job on piecing it together. I hope you are happy with the product because I know as a reader I was. Really? You liked it? To tell you the truth, even after three drafts, I think it was my least favorite chapters up to date (writing-style wise), even though all of the other chapters are literally first drafts and hot from the keyboard. To hear that it worked out all right for you makes me feel like those extra hours of rewrites were worth it. Thank you so much. That makes me feel about 100 times better! G. Khun wrote:
Another great chapter!!! I'm very impressed with how you portray Clark's "post-traumatic" symptoms. It is heart wrenching and so believable. I'd sure like to see Lois find out Clark is Superman soon?? Keep up the good work! I check often for new chapters and when I find one it makes my day!!! Thank you so much! It's been hard walking the "not too much, but still enough" line for Lois and Clark's emotional states, so I'm very glad to hear that it's working for you. I'm flattered that you check for updates...it makes me feel special to know I have people waiting out there! Anyway, this is really long, so I'm going to go back and work on my next chapter. It's shaping up nicely, but as usual it's longer than I expect it to be (I usually shoot for around 3000 words), but I don't think you guys mind, hm? Hopefully not. I do remember having a warning about me being extremely verbous and chatty on the first chapter, though, so don't say you weren't warned! Thanks again for all the reviews. They really do help a ton! Have a great day, guys! SmirkyRaven
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Just curious, though, Ann. What exactly is an A-plot? The A-plot, Rachel, is the stuff that guys want to see when they watch movies. The fights. The explosions. The evil scheming. The horrible villains. The way the heroes have to fight for their lives. The B-plot, on the other hand, is the kind of thing the guys tend to fast-forward when they watch movies. The intimate, intense scenes between the romantic couple. The way they look into each other's eyes. The small, tender gestures. The way a look speaks of incredible longing and says more than a thousand words. The scary truths they dare to reveal about themselves to their loved one. The kisses.... And, if you hadn't understood it already, Rachel, I'm here for the B-plots, the relationship between Lois and Clark. As for the A-plots... well, I have no favorite villain, and there is no villain I love to hate. I just hate them, you know? Ann
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Apr 2003
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The A-plot, Rachel, is the stuff that guys want to see when they watch movies. The fights. The explosions. The evil scheming. The horrible villains. The way the heroes have to fight for their lives.
The B-plot, on the other hand, is the kind of thing the guys tend to fast-forward when they watch movies. I was going to take great exception to this gross generalization of "guys" and how we view entertainment, but decided it wasn't worth it. For me: A-plot - the plotline that really drives the story. The thing that causes Lois and Clark to interact. B-plot - The interaction between Lois and Clark. I'm here for the Lois and Clark B-plot stuff. I never fast-forward over anything, and often will rewatch things (to my wife and daughters dimay) to pick up any and all little details of a scene, just to make sure I've got it all.
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Jeff
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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I should probably comment on the story...  I can perfectly understand why Clark hasn't told Lois yet. It's going to take him getting angry at the way Lois is treating him to make him say something. And he's not going to do that because he is too full of self-doubt and fear. To him, as Clark, he's only a friend to her. I don't think they are at the best friend stage yet in this story either. There is no reason, other than his need to be with Lois, for him to come clean. So far, he has Lois (in a way) so he doesn't have the need to confess. I'm really dissappointed with Lois, however. I saw her "helping" of Clark more of a sense of duty than any kind of feeling on her part. It's interesting that no one has ever thought to ask Clark what it was like being held by B39. For Lois, she screamed right off for Superman to come help her. What if Clark didn't scream right off? What if they tortured him to make him cry out for Superman? Has she thought of that!? No. She's so worried Clark or someone else will betray Superman that she's ignoring the fact that maybe Clark might have taken a beating at the hands of his captors. Enough rambling. I am really enjoying this story. I thought the ending of this chapter sucked. It was cruel to cut the scene off in the middle like that.
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Jeff
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Posts: 234 |
Ah. Thanks jwb and Ann for the clarification. I love both types of plots, I guess, so I hope I can satisfy both of them in DD...
I understand your frustration about Lois, jwb, but I also feel for her. I mean, she can't tell anyone about what has happened--not even Melinda. After what she's been through she should be an emotional wreck--and she is, but she's refusing to let herself hurt and *feel* by clamping down and being very, very, very focused on just one or two things. She wasn't lying when she told Clark (as Superman) that her only reality was him. After the horror, she disconnected herself to anything but her lifeline--Superman--and now she's having trouble coming back to life. As a consequence, everything is getting pushed to the side--even herself, let alone her partner, who seems like he's just *trying* to be annoying, in her mind. His troubles are the least of her troubles, right now.
Chapter 33 should be up within a half an hour or so...
SmirkyRaven
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,763 |
I'm back into reading this. I just reread the last few chapters. I couldn't remember where I stopped reading. I was frozen to my chair, but I was shivering. I was so nervous for our two reporters. You tortured me over Clark not being able to fly. Just like the show, my hopes get up and BAM! They get washed away. HAHA. What a way to make this triangle continue. Lois swore, and the blood drained from Clark's face.
No. Nonononononono… I like how you put "No. Nononono...." and alike words after a description. More realisitic. Often when one is freaked out you either have a million thoughts go through one's mind or just simple words repeated over and over. A gut, basic, human need. There were so many sentences that I loved! They hadn’t flown. He was grounded—trapped again. Caught and caged like a bird with its wings clipped. Lois stifled the gibbering voice mercilessly, gritting her teeth and concentrating on righteous anger. Clark felt frozen. His legs were leaden, and his lungs had risen into his throat and were choking him, even as his heart grew into a painful knife in his chest. He couldn’t breathe, and the world was beginning to blur before his eyes. I was really shivering at this part...and no it wasn't because of the ice-cream I was eating. “C-Clark,” Lois said insistently. “Clark, listen to me!” I am glad Lois was supporting him. I know if she didn't, it wouldn't serve well for them both, but I am glad she did. I don't know whether to trust this group or not. I guess I'm not, why would they hold her at gun point!?! AHHH!!! I'm running to the next part! I have to go to bed soon and I want to read more. EXCELLENT!
I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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