From last time:

Talan shook her head, somewhat dazed by the anti-climax of winning the battle. And apparently also the war. She had spent years thinking of nothing else, letting everything else fall by the wayside, telling herself that everything could wait until the war was over. Until then, there was no time for anything except the mission. Now the mission had been accomplished, and she didn't know how to begin picking up the threads of a life she'd abandoned years before. Perhaps she'd never expected to survive the war. Perhaps she'd always assumed that, her mission accomplished, she'd simply fade away.

Where was she supposed to go from here?

********

New stuff:


Zara held his arm tightly as they stood, waiting anxiously for Commander Flad to return with news. They'd been waiting all night, barely aware of the fact that it was now morning and that none of them had slept in well over a day. He entered the conference room with several junior officers in tow. A wide grin split his normally dour face. "Ma'am, sir, I am pleased to report that the mission was a complete success."

Clark let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding in. Their advisors, normally calm and staid, cheered loudly. Zara took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She smiled up at him, a look of pure relief on her face. "It's over," she whispered. "It's finally over."

"Every mission was a success, sir?" Ching asked immediately, obviously needing to assure himself before he could share the celebratory sentiment.

"Every mission, Commander," Flad confirmed. "Nor has been captured, his bases of operations were destroyed and most of his forces surrendered."

"What about Rae Et?" Ching pressed.

"The Interceptors tried to force her craft to land, but it engaged in evasive maneuvers and fired on the squadron. They had no choice but to shoot it down. There were no survivors of the crash."

Clark closed his eyes, trying to let the words sink in. Nor had been captured. Rae Et was dead. The rebellion had been decapitated. Its forces were now giving up. It was over. He sent up a prayer of thanks to fate and whatever deities may have been listening.

"Ma'am, sir, congratulations," Flad said, still smiling.

"Thank you, Commander, but the victory belongs to you and your forces," Zara replied.

"We are forever in your debt," Clark added.

Flad bowed graciously. "It has been my honor and privilege to serve, sir."

The conference room devolved into chaos as the officers and advisors chattered over the details of the battle that they managed to piece together. Clark slipped away from Zara and Flad, who continued talking about the successful mission, and pulled Ching aside.

"Get me Talan as soon as possible," he said.

"Of course," Ching replied with a nod.

********

Lok Sim looked up as the general commander once again took the empty seat beside him. "Very nicely done, Sergeant," she said.

"I just did my job, ma'am," he replied.

"Well, under these circumstances, just doing your job can be rather heroic."

He shook his head. "No one so much as fired at me." He realized that it sounded like he was complaining and hastened to clarify. "I mean, I'm very thankful, ma'am. You kept me out of combat, just like you said you would. But I can't help but feel like everyone else on this transport can say that when they were needed, they answered their world's call. They risked their lives. I don't know if I would have had that kind of courage."

She frowned thoughtfully, her brow furrowed. "I know it seems like the most important question you can ask yourself, but believe me when I tell you that it’s not worth knowing the answer. I don't doubt that you'd do exactly what you had to if you were faced with that kind of danger, but the sort of things the men and women on this transport have seen, the things we've had to do…some knowledge isn't worth the price we pay to obtain it."

Lok Sim nodded, realizing the wisdom of her words. It was absurd to look back on his less than heroic service with regret. He'd never been asked to kill, to risk his life or the lives of those around him and for it, he was thankful. This war had been nothing but confusion and chaos and he was relieved that it was finally over. "You're right."

"Anxious to get back home?" she asked.

He nodded. "I just want to go back to my life," he said quietly. "To my family and friends and my work."

"You'll be back at the colony in a few weeks," she said. "I know it isn't soon enough. Thank you again for your service, Sergeant. We could not have captured Nor without you."

"Of course, ma'am," he replied humbly. He'd only done a small, simple part of the job, and hardly one worth singling out. Lok Sim was overcome with relief that Nor had finally been captured, but it was clearly the general commander and her forces who deserved the credit. No matter who was responsible, the war was over and he was going home to the people he cared about.

********

"Where is he?" Clark demanded as he stared hard at the communications monitor. Anger welled up inside him, burning in his veins. It should have been enough that Nor was finally in custody. That the bastard would never harm another person for as long as he lived. But it wasn't. Clark needed to see it, he needed to see his enemy laid low like the scum he was.

"He's in custody here at the forward command center, sir," Talan replied. Her face was still streaked with soot and dirt, her eyes red and irritated.

"I'm on my way out there," he said.

"Sir, I strongly recommend against it," she responded.

"I'll be on the next transport," Clark insisted sternly. He had no interest in listening to her try to talk him out of it. She'd explain all the reasons why it was a bad idea and why he was too emotional and in no condition to face Nor. And he didn't care. She'd fought too many of his battles for him. He was tired of it, tired of hiding from Nor. Tired of letting others do what he was supposed to do. Before she could protest, he turned off the monitor and called Lieutenant Parth. He'd waited long enough to do this.

********

"Sir, I really do not think this is a good idea," she cautioned as strongly as she dared. He said nothing as he stepped off his transport. She followed him into the command center and stepped in front of him outside Nor's cell.

"I have to do this," Kal El replied firmly. Undeterred, he walked past her into the holding room. He crossed the threshold, but went no further. She stood behind him in the doorway.

Nor stood up, his hands shackled in front of him and linked to the chain around his waist. "Kal El." He said the First Minister's name with such contempt. In front of her, she could see Kal El's hands tightening into fists at his sides. His jaw tensed. He stepped forward toward Nor. The other man backed up a few paces in response. Talan stepped fully into the room, pulling the door shut behind her.

Kal El's shoulders rose and fell as he breathed hard. She could see a slight tremor in his body. "Sir, I don't think…" she began.

"I swear by everything good and decent in this world or any other, I will make you pay for what you've done," Kal El growled.

"You? You weak, pathetic excuse for a man…" Nor mocked him, jutting out his chin defiantly. "Your strength was tested, Kal El, and found wanting."

The First Minister lunged at Nor, grabbing him roughly by the collar of his shirt. He raised one clenched fist and brought it down hard across Nor's face before she was able to reach him. From behind, Talan hooked one arm under his and brought the other over his opposite shoulder, her body pressed hard against his back as she tried to exert some leverage over his powerful frame. Her hands held tightly to his chest, she could feel his heart thundering against his ribs. Her own heart must have been beating just as rapidly. Kal El's body heaved with each labored breath. She pulled him back with all her strength, but despite the fact that she had several inches' height advantage over him, Kal El was far bigger and stronger than she. She managed to pull him backward only because he did not resist her. "Sir, you cannot do this," she whispered breathlessly into his ear.

He remained tense and rigid, still grasping Nor's clothing with one hand, the other blood-covered fist raised high as though he intended to strike him again. Nor looked up at him, his eyes wide with terror. "Sir, please," she whispered urgently. And she felt him relent. His body relaxed slightly and he lowered his fist. He released Nor from his grip. The other man immediately raised his bound hands to his bleeding nose.

"I knew you lacked the strength. And now you'll pretend your cowardice is mercy," Nor spat.

Having pulled the First Minister away from the prisoner, Talan quickly grabbed Nor and pinned him against the wall, her forearm pressed against his throat. "It is mercy that keeps him from tearing you apart limb by limb," she whispered harshly, trying desperately to keep her body from trembling. "But do not for a moment expect me to show the same mercy. I'm no better than you are, Nor." She let him go in disgust, turning to find Kal El already moving toward the door.

She followed him out, securing the door to the holding room behind her. "Sir!" she called after him but he did not acknowledge her. He simply kept walking, down the hallway and out of the building. She jogged after him, catching up with him outside. "Sir?" she said again, this time more softly, not certain he could hear her over the whipping wind. Talan touched his shoulder gently.

He pivoted and turned forcefully, pushing her away. Caught off guard, she stumbled back a step. "Why did you stop me?" he shouted, his voice full of rage. He grabbed her shoulders and held her in an almost painfully tight grip. "Why didn't you let me kill him?" he demanded. The flash of fire and anger in his eyes died as he looked at her pleadingly. His grip on her relaxed. "Why didn't you let me kill him?" he asked again, a plaintive tone creeping into his voice.

"You wouldn't have, even if I hadn't been there, you wouldn't have let yourself do it," she said.

He let go of her and turned away. "You can't know that," he said.

"I know you," she replied. "Sir, you are the most decent and compassionate person I have ever known."

"Was. I was a decent man once," he said, his voice hollow and distant.

"You still are," she insisted.

"I just kept thinking, if I kill him, he'll have no power over me. I won't spend the rest of my life afraid of my shadow, trembling in a corner somewhere like a child."

"If you kill him, then he will have finally killed the good in you. He spent six weeks trying and he couldn't, sir. He couldn't destroy what makes you an honorable man." She touched his shoulder again, breaching at least a hundred rules of protocol and decorum and plain good sense, expecting to be rebuffed again, perhaps violently. But he didn't move.

"I wanted to die," he confessed. "I wanted him to put me out of my misery. I wanted to give up and die. Dammit, I almost begged him to kill me. I made a promise to my wife that I would come home and I wanted to break it. I'm not an honorable man anymore."

His words cut deep. He'd never admitted this to her before, and she doubted he'd told another soul. He'd let the despair fester deep inside, poisoning him slowly. "You were used to being physically invulnerable, sir, but every human being has a breaking point. You went through something no one should have to endure. And you did exactly what you were supposed to do. You survived, sir. I don't know how many other people would have been able to do that."

He lowered his head, his shoulders falling in defeat. "How am I supposed to face Lois, knowing that I gave up?"

"I know your wife," she said. "I've never met her, but I know her, sir. I see her reflected in you and I know that she will not judge you on seconds of doubt, but on years of strength, courage, and compassion."

"I'm sorry," he murmured as he turned around. "I had no right to lay a hand on you."

"It's forgotten," she replied quietly.

"I'm just so tired of feeling weak and helpless," he said under his breath. "You never would have given up the way I did."

"I never would have survived what you did," Talan confessed, hearing her voice waver. "I could only wish to be as strong as you think I am."

He stepped toward her and she found herself pulling him into a fierce embrace, not sure it was in her to convey comfort and support. She closed her eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to well over. Silently, a single tear slipped down her cheek, practically freezing against her skin in the cold wind. She felt her heart break for him and was swept away completely by the pain. Talan knew that she could only feel the echoes of the agony he was burdened with, and she wondered how he had the strength to endure. What she felt was crushing her; what he went through must have been so many times worse.

"Thank you," he murmured. "I don't think I could do this without you." She hugged him just a little more tightly, hoping to convey that he wouldn't have to.

"I'm sorry, sir," she whispered, not recognizing her own voice. "I withdrew when you needed a friend the most."

"You're here now," he said. She felt him draw in a deep breath as he stepped back. "I'm not sure how many more times I can fall apart like this on you and not have you see me as less than a man. I don't know, maybe you're already starting to wonder if it's such a good idea to take orders from me."

It was best for both of them that he not know that she saw him acutely as a man, that she'd fallen so deeply and completely in love with him. "Sir, if you ask me to, I will follow you into hell and back," she heard herself say.

"You already have," he replied.

"Then I'll do it again."

********

"Alon was picked up twenty minutes ago," Ching said as he stepped into the First Ministers' study. "First he feigned outrage, then he rambled about his years of faithful service, then he declared the whole thing to be a misunderstanding."

"Sounds like you heard more than you wanted to from him," Zara said as she stood up from her desk and walked toward him.

"And then some," Ching agreed, drawing her into his arms.

"Congratulations, Commander," Zara said, her voice soft and low.

"This is your victory, not mine," Ching replied humbly.

"Don't be modest. I told you I could never do this without you."

He tucked a dark strand of hair behind her ear. "You are an incredible woman, have I ever mentioned that?"

She smiled and kissed him in response. "I love you," she whispered, bare inches from his lips.

"And I you," he replied. They remained silent for a long moment, simply holding each other. She needed this. She needed to be with him, to just be able to hold on to him, to share her relief and her exhaustion and the millions of jumbled up emotions inside her with him.

"Have you heard from Clark?" she asked as she looked up at him.

Ching shook his head. "No."

"We shouldn't have let him go," she murmured.

"He is a grown man," Ching countered gently. "He's capable of making this decision on his own."

"I trust his judgment, but isn't it impaired when it comes to Nor? I'm afraid going there is only going to upset him more."

"Zara, I know how much you care for him. Believe me, I do, too. But part of what's been troubling him for so long is his feeling like he cannot control what's happening around him. Confronting Nor may finally give him back some sense of control."

"And what if it only fuels his anger?"

"Nothing will happen," Ching insisted firmly. "You know Talan would stop it if she had to."

"I know," she agreed.

"You have never been more right than when you insisted that he could help save our world. He isn't simply a good man, Zara, he's a strong one, too. He's going to need that strength, and our support, to get through Nor's trial. Keep having faith in him."

"I will," she replied. Her lover was right, she realized. She had a tendency to fret over Clark, a fact she felt was fully justified by the circumstances, even though it accomplished little. Zara could do no more than offer him her unconditional friendship and support and she was determined to do just that.

"Now, I suggest we take this opportunity to relax, because I highly doubt things will remain calm for long. People are going to look to you to bind this world's wounds."

"I never even let myself imagine what this moment would feel like. It's over. Nor's been captured, Alon was arrested, Rae Et is dead. I'm so relieved I don't even know what to do now."

He kissed her gently. "I can think of a few things."

"Really? Such as?" she teased him.

"First, I want to make love with you," he replied. "Then I want to sleep for about a week."

She smiled as their lips met. "I think you've earned the chance to rest," she murmured.

"Is that all?" he replied, giving her the teasing grin only she got to see. There were two sides to Ching, the formal, reserved, and somber side he presented to the rest of the world, and then there was his private side – warm and gentle, but also capable of fiery passion and remarkable stubbornness. It was the side of him he only revealed to her. Zara had admired the former, but had fallen completely in love with the latter. She tangled her hands in his hair and kissed him.

********

His eyes held her gaze as he spoke; the depth of the sadness she saw there kept her transfixed. "The person I once was would never have considered murder," he said softly. He leaned forward in his seat, his elbows on his knees, and looked down at the floor of her office in central command.

Talan turned her focus to her hands, folded on the surface of her desk. She swallowed roughly, her throat suddenly dry. "I know that there's a darkness inside you that never existed before this war," she began, her voice barely above a whisper. "But a good person isn't someone who never has ugly or terrible thoughts. A good person is someone who fights the darkness within them. We all see something in ourselves we don't like, something we wish weren't there. What matters is what we do about it."

Kal El looked back up at her, his dark brown eyes unguarded. "Everything you've seen, everything you've been through…I don't want say that you make it look easy, but you never hesitate, you never doubt, you always do the right thing."

She stifled a sigh. Would that he only knew the truth. "I hesitate, sir. And I doubt. I fight the same battles you do and much of the time, especially recently, I feel certain I'm going to lose." There was a slight waver to her voice as she finished.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I do to you what people on Earth used to do to me. I expect you to have all the answers, to never be afraid, or uncertain. It's too much of a burden."

"Sir, I am humbled and honored to have your confidence," she corrected him. She looked at the man she'd fallen in love with, still marveling at the feelings he'd awoken in her, in the way he'd changed her. He'd disrupted the balance in her life, he'd reminded her what it was like to be afraid, to be angry and uncertain. To grieve. To hope. And there was no way she could ever thank him for it. She looked downward, knowing that if she met his gaze, she'd never be able to hide her emotions. "You ask us all to be better than we are, and you make us want to try."

********

The soft sound of knocking woke him from his dark, deep, and dreamless sleep. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around the unfamiliar room, his surroundings muted and gray in the dim light. Where was he? His gaze settled on the perfectly organized desk and the duty locker standing beside it. Inside it hung two sets of rust red fatigues and several of her black dress uniforms.

Oh.

He was in the commanding officer's quarters. Her quarters. Standing up, he stretched, marveling at the fact that his body wasn't sore or tired any more. He picked up his uniform from where it lay on the ground beside the bed and pulled it on hastily before opening the door.

"I'm terribly sorry to disturb you, sir," Talan said quietly. "But the First Minister wishes to speak with you."

Clark nodded. "Can I take the call in here?" he asked.

"Of course, sir," she said with a polite bow. She retreated, closing the door behind her.

He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and checked the time. He'd slept all the way through to the morning – something he hadn't done in months. He couldn't be sure if it was the exhaustion after months of not sleeping, the relief of having captured Nor at last, or the fact that he'd finally gotten some things off his chest the night before, but for some reason, there had been no nightmares, no panic attacks to startle him awake. Crossing the room in long strides, Clark turned on the communications screen. Zara's image appeared, smiling hopefully at him.

"Good morning, Clark," she said.

He stifled a yawn. "Good morning," he replied.

"I think we should address the High Council this evening, will you be back in time?"

He nodded. "I've done what I needed to here," he said. "I'll be on the first available transport."

"I haven't thanked you yet," Zara said quietly. "You saved my world, and my people. Not you, the invincible near-deity, but you, the man. This world will forever be in your debt."

He smiled faintly. "I'm just glad I was able to help. I'll see you later today." He turned off the screen and stepped out into the hallway.

Talan intercepted him on his way to central command. "Good morning, sir," she said.

"Talan, I can't thank you enough," he replied quietly.

"You're quite welcome."

"About last night…" he began.

"It's protocol, sir; a superior officer visiting a base is supposed to take the commanding officer's quarters," she assured him.

"It just didn't seem like a very polite thing to do."

"Military etiquette can be a bit peculiar."

He smiled briefly. "It looks like I need to get back to the main colony as soon as possible."

"I'll arrange transportation immediately," she replied.

Clark touched her shoulder. "Thank you again."

"Of course, sir," she said with a slight nod.

********