Lois & Clark Forums Forums General Discussion Lois & Clark Caption Competition XXII

Last time on Caption Competition Theater...

Queen of the Capes posted a picture out of everyone's favorite episode involving lethal novelty office equipment, "Lucky Leon"!

Competition was fierce, with several solid entries.

It was a close call in the end. The judge even had to call in outside authority to make the final call. (Boy, we've all been there, haven't we? Remember the incident with the Canadian penny? That was a tight situation, wasn't it?)

Tension mounted, but the judges made their call.

We bring you live, now, to our latest winner, who will start the games anew...

---

Thanks to QotC and her Mom! I'm glad you liked it, and am honored to have been chosen from amongst such distinguished company.

So, time for a new pic, then.

Hmm. Well, a certain scene seems to have interested some FoLCs over in the challenge folder. So, let's see what you guys can do with this one...



Paul

Jimmy: And then you said, "Jimmy...I can make a man of you."

Lois: Jimmy. That's not the pole you're grabbing onto right now. Hand offs the thigh!

JD
who might come back with more later after that thing called sleep

--
Jimmy: I swear, Lois, it was the *hugest* cockroach I've ever seen!
Lois: It's the thirteenth time you tell me that and I have to repeat: "I BELIEVE YOU!" Did you think I'd be up here if I didn't believe you?
--

See ya,
AnnaBtG.

Jimmy: "Ok...y-you go first."

Lois: "No Jimmy, it was your BIG idea that got us into this mess, now its gonna be your pole dance that gets us out of it."

Jimmy: *whinning* "Oh but I don't wanna..."

Lois: "Listen! You go first and I'll follow."

Jimmy: "Ok, Lets see what I can do!"

Fades To Black

Later Days!
Andie

Jimmy: I know you don't like sports, Lois. But you must admit the view's breathtaking. Plus these are the Olympic Games and we're covering it!!! God I love this job!!

Lois: not to burst your bubble, but we're not *covering* it. We're live. And about to become the most original Olympic flame in the Games history. Got your camera?

In the distance, the cheering of the crowd suddenly faded as the lyrics of "Come on baby, light my fire" filled Athens Olympic stadium.

Carole (who feels AnnaBtG's gonna bite her head off)

Well, been a while since the last caption, so must be time for a new picture!

This one's a tough call, but I think I'm going to have to go with...

Good one, Anna!

You're up!

Paul

I'm glad you liked my caption, Paul.

So, FoLCs... let's see what you can do with this:



See ya,
AnnaBtG. (who enjoyed Cyad's caption really much )

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif"> (who enjoyed Cyad's caption really much

Lois: If you *ever* eat another one of my Double Fudge Crunch bars, you will not live to see another day.

LOL Shadow!!!! GOOD ONE!!! I don't have anything else to say for now...

Later Days!
Andie (who hopes to get an idea soon)

Clark: Lois, are you okay?

Lois: I just spent hours tromping through the sewers.

Clark, hiding a smile: I see.

Lois: But it was worth it!

Clark: <blink> ... What? ... Uhm, that is... It was...?

Lois: I've got a page 1 for sure!

Clark: You... do?

Lois: We know almost nothing about Superman, but now we've got some information!

Clark: We do? Uhm... Like what?

Lois: He landed in the sewers, and he can disguise his space ship. Not only that, but I have it!

Clark: You... what?

Lois: Now, if only I could figure out why he chose to disguise it as a Godzilla doll...

Okay, I see no new posts, so time to pick a winner.

Drumroll please...

Shadow, you're up!

See ya,
AnnaBtG.

Mucho Gracias. Now that we've hit the extent of my Spanish, here's what I dug up. These pesky things called night classes seem to get in my way, but here's what I came up with.

Lois: Aaah! The roof... the roof... the roof is on fire! Help, Superman! It's a disco inferno!!

---

The seven stages of falling disco balls:

1. Denial: "I'm going to be crushed by a disco ball? This is so not happening."

2. Guilt: "Oh, I knew I shouldn't have come to this stupid criminal dance club. Clark was right. These things never go well for us."

3. Anger: "Wait, what am I saying? I'm about to be crushed by a disco ball! How is that my fault? It's the fault of that idiot who made the faulty cables! If I survive this, I'm going to get him!"

4. Bargaining: "Superman! Save me! Please, save me! I'll do anything if you just drop whatever you're doing and save me!!"

5. Depression: "Oh, who am I kidding? He'll never make it in time. I'm doomed."

6. Acceptence: "After everything I've been through, I'm going to be crushed by a disco ball. Just the story of my life, isn't it?"

and, finally...

7. Relief: "He caught it! I'm saved! ... Ooo, it's so shiney!"

---

"No, Disco Man is too powerful! I can't bear to look at his deadly lack of taste! My eyes, my eyes! I don't know if even Superman can stand up to him! I can only pray that somehow, KISS will arrive to save the day..."

---

"Oh, yeah? Well, I bet you didn't expect this, Mr. 'Call-me-Daniel'! Yes, I have the power to create and control disco balls with my mind! Take this!"

---

"I am going to kill Jimmy. He will never plan another Daily Planet party so long as I live. Volly Disco Ball? What was he thinking??"

---

"Hey, wait! That's a New Krypton battleship? Huh. It's a lot smaller than I was expecting..."

Well, *hmphf*. I *was* going to say:

...but Paul seems to have stolen them right out of my brain!

But seriously...nothing to add myself.

Just wanted to say thanks, Paul for never failing to crack me up!

For anyone that asks...this is Paul's fault!

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking that disco ball would hit me in the eye.
I spent oh so many seconds just feeling sorry for myself
I wanted to cry, but now I'll hold my hands up high
And try to stop, the disco ball
I'm not that weak little person that you think I am
So you felt like dropping on my head, and just expect me to die
But now I'm saving myself and you won't succeed at all!

Go on now go! Don't drop on me!
Just go back up now, cause you're not welcome on my head
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with your glare?
You think I'd crumble?
You think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no, not I
I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to block, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live, I've got all my wrath to give
And I will survive
I will survive
I will survive
_____

Voice over: This just in, it seems a renegade disco ball tried to take revenge on Lois Lane for her drunken rendition of "I Will Survive" and other such songs as "Turn the Beat Around" and "YMCA". Thankfully, though, she *did* survive. The Gorn was not available for comment.


Sara (who's answer to Paul is, "No, nothing's ever my fault!" I'm an angel! )

Sara, that was great! Much better than what I was thinking of.

Even funnier now that I know we were thinking of two entirely different things (and that neither had seen what the other was thinking about).

See, FoLCs, Sara and I have been chatting on IRC. She mentioned the song, and this strange alien name. I thought we were talking about this CGI movie which you really should see, if you haven't yet. Especially after reading those captions!

Sara thought we were talking about an Nfic writer whose very funny stories are hosted on the Nfic archive linked off Annesplace. If you have access to that, go read those stories, too!

Knowing about both makes the caption even better!

What makes it all better than that is that we didn't realize we were thinking of two entirely different things until several minutes into the conversation, when we both tried to convince another FoLC to go look at what we were talking about!

Then, after that, we decided to find out just what a Gorn was, after all. The creature in the video does have a name, but it's not the Gorn. The Gorn turned out to be an alien race from Star Trek. I found that with a net search that led me to this site: http://www.70disco.com/gornpage.htm

Turns out the fact that it's hosted on 70disco.com is a complete coincidence, but that just made the whole silly mess that much funnier.

Meantime, I'd started coming up with a caption that goes something like this:

Jimmy <off camera>: ... and cut! Great work! Eat your heart out, Gorn, we've got live action!

But I was stuck on what Lois should say to that.

Of course, that was while I thought the Gorn was the alien in the video. It has an entirely different meaning depending on whether you think "the Gorn" is:

(a) A computer-animated singing creature


(b) An nfic writer (picture censored)
(c) A barbaric lizard-like race from Star Trek

Just thought I'd share all that, because I think it makes Sara's great caption so much better.

Paul, acting completely nuts, but somehow not worried about his reputation...

*GASP* *CHOKE*

Oh well...you all should watch it...*you'll* think it's funny!

Sara (who is still trying to catch her breath)

Which episode did that Disco pic come from?

James

James- It's a Small World After All...the one where Lois goes to her high school reunion and Annette (jealous, seeking revenge classmate) tries to have the ball dropped on her head, but get saved at the last second so she could have the attention. But of course it backfired.

Oh, and for the record, The Gorn's stories aren't typically funny, but there are some great token lines. The one that reminds me of 'I Will Survive' and disco songs in general is "Going, Going, Gone."

Love the pics you added, Paul!


Sara(who still laughs when she thinks about that darned alien video )