Hi peixinho!
Standing on the sidewalk in front of the Crescendo Café, Lois wondered again how she had gotten herself into this situation.
She liked a nice guy. This usually backfires.
brooding over the possible counter-arguments with which she could have defeated Clark Kent.
Date avoidance chess. Only problem is, Clark is playing checkers.
A phone number stared back at her in firm, clear handwriting, with unmistakable, legible digits. There was no “seven” that looked like a “one” and no “three” that looked like an “eight.” A trap, yes, skillfully woven, and Lois had been caught in it.
Yes, she got presented with a challenge. The one sure way to ensnare a Lois Lane. You can even tell her it’s all a setup.
The number dialed itself on the phone, someone with a voice very much like her own arranged a date with Clark Kent, and now she was here.
It was a piece he really liked: checked, predominantly dark blue, crossed by a few thin stripes in red and yellow.
Cute foreshadowing
Either way, she moved towards him and analyzed the establishment, to avoid eye contact while walking (that’s always very awkward).
It’s also helpful in identifying escape routes. A practice used both in business meetings (some call them burglaries) and wedding ceremonies.
then deciding to provoke him to shake off the sudden nervousness. “I would have found you soon enough, Mr. Kent. You didn’t have to stand up.”
Conversation starter!
LOIS:
Trying to beat me with politeness, huh? “Good afternoon.” She smiled sweetly. See, Clark Kent? I can be polite too.
So you haven’t been raised by wolves and/or have learned how to take it in polite company.
LOIS: Don’t knock it until you’ve seen the manners the other half displays. Most of the time, they don’t even decorate the warehouses where they accommodate their guests with flowers.
GOON: There will be flowers at her funeral. If they find her. That should suffice.
”And of course I came, I said I would. I’m not a liar.” He let out a short laugh. “Oh, you’re not going to defend yourself against my implied accusation?”
She really goes all out with her spikes.
But I’ve already figured out that you take great pleasure in twisting everything I say, and I don’t want to be a killjoy.”
Lois raised her eyebrows. “Someone’s feeling quite bold today.”
“I’m thinking only of your entertainment. Now you can tease me all you want about what I said.”
A battle of wits and words!
LOIS: Great. I’m a reporter. I’ll win that one.
CLARK:
Careful, Mr. Kent. People tend to do foolish things when they’re too cheerful.”
Like asking out prickly women?
I got my dream job and I'm on a date with a beautiful, intelligent woman. What more could a guy ask for?"
"That the woman were a little less intelligent, perhaps,"
But that would make the conversation oh so dull. Which in turn would mean the banter would be less likely to result in her inviting him in for ‘coffee’.
It wasn't as if she had never been called beautiful by a man. Or intelligent, for that matter. Well, Perry and Jimmy had called her intelligent, at least.
Yes, crime bosses are not known for focusing on a woman’s … hidden attributes when they capture her as she’s breaking into their lair.
Well, Perry and Jimmy had called her intelligent, at least. And a few teachers over the years. But none of them counted, honestly.
Very well written to establish that her brains never mattered when she was out dating men.
"And, on top of everything, funny."
You should see her take cake in the face.
"inner bitterness of her soul" (exact words from Rob Levine, a crazy psychologist she had gone out with a few times last year).
So, she got psychoanalyzed by her date before he lo-napped her, took her to his lair, tried to turn her into some type of assassin, love slave, or science experiment, and then got himself arrested?
He was convinced, in his own words, by my proactivity, and I start this Monday."
Does that mean he has not heard of Lois Lane of the Daily Planet? Wait, did Lois tell him her last name?
"But we aren’t talking about work on our first date."
"Aren’t we?" Now she was genuinely curious about what his job was.
"Not on our first date. Maybe on the third. Or the second, if you're lucky."
Well...unless he plans to take her out again on Saturday, I’d say, work will be all they talk about by then.
CLARK: Discussing how to escape from being tied up in a lair doesn’t mean we’re talking shop!
LOIS: I do like how he counts us getting captured as a ‘date’. He’s very practical.
Or at least tell me your last name, so we're even."
Thank you for reminding us!
"I'm very famous in the city. I wouldn't want you to look something up about me and ruin your fun."
She even got her own police code!
"It's not unfamiliar, but... I don't remember hearing about you."
And he was doing so well about getting a third date.
Fine, not being recognized by face she could handle, but not being recognized by name?
Given her work, the first is a good thing. And the second, that just means he’s not a criminal or a politician.
She wondered if he didn't read the Daily Planet — because, after all, what kind of Metropolis resident doesn't read the Daily Planet?
There’s the 50% who read the Star and the 30% who read the Inquirer.
If he's a Star reader, I'm getting up and leaving right now, she decreed.
A girl does have to have some standards.
"Okay," Lois continued. "And how many cows do you have?"
That’s like asking ‘how many wives do you have’.
Clark frowned. "Hey! It's kind of prejudiced to assume I lived on a farm and had cows just because I grew up in Kansas."
LOIS: So, you didn’t?
CLARK: I didn’t say that.
You grew up taking care of animals and you're a vegetarian! So that's why you ordered a cheese sandwich."
For a second there I thought she’d mix up veterinarian and vegetarian. Also, no, he’s just an honest person. They still have those in Smallville.
"If your last name is Lane and you're a single mother, then your son's name is Lane Lane?"
Now, that’s evil!
Perfect! "Sam. His name is Sam. Samuel. Lane."
Like her father. Makes sense.
That was the Daily Planet's star reporter, too committed to the truth for her own good.
She muses while lying through her teeth.
"I like Lane Lane better. It's a perfect name for an imaginary child."
Clark!
Mentally, Lois frantically knocked on her brain's door to see if the brilliant three-time Kerth Award-winning investigative journalist was still in there.
Brain’s out partying. No reason to reason to expect a need for escaping criminals tonight.
Her plan was to use the time while she chewed and swallowed the food to think of a way to come out on top of this situation, but it was a bit difficult.
She could adopt a ten-year-old boy from the Luthor House for Parent-less Orphans, teach him about his new life and introduce him as her son?
All that was left for her was to remove the remaining pieces of her armor and accept her fate with honor and dignity.
That’s both extremely endearing and extremely naughty!
she asked, still with her mouth full, because she couldn't wait for the chewing time. In the end, it wasn't a very good illustration of honor or dignity.
"One of the first things you told me today was that you're not a liar. Ironic, isn't it?"
Apparently, that was a lie.
"I understand. You wanted to get rid of men. But wouldn't it be easier to just say you already have a boyfriend?"
Or use the Man-X spray she used to prevent The Green Mantis from being unleashing on the Metropolis Tigers stadium last spring?
They shared a loaded look. Lois felt a blush threatening to rise, and she never blushed.
She also never lies. Or talks to the father of her future son.
"But that doesn't change the fact that you're a cruel person, Lois Lane," Clark continued,
Careful, Clark!
"I'm serious." He mirrored her posture. "I was already preparing myself to become a stepfather and do all those things I told you with him."
Wait, is he *trying* to make her run for the hills?
"I don't think fish would be very interested in taking care of a garden."
You could make it an underwater garden. Or have a rather large aquarium and fill it with sharks. They love to play with potential boyfriends Lois brings home. If she rented the apartment on the fourth floor, she could build a trap door...
Lois tried to suppress her smile by biting the inside of her cheek, but it was in vain. She looked at him through her eyelashes, her eyes shining, and Clark had to brace his foot behind the chair to keep himself from floating.
Most adorable!
After Lois questioned him to her heart's content, she finally felt comfortable enough to start opening up.
And yet, she got no idea he’s a reporter.
On Monday, they bumped into each other for the second time — only now at the Daily Planet newsroom.
Oh, Friday *next* week. Also, I did not see this coming *this* story
Their date on Saturday had been good,
Oops, what I get for letting too much time pass between reading sessions.
"We went straight from the 'arcade date next Friday' stage to the ‘strictly professional relationship’ stage.
Oops? I guess it would have been awkward if she had invited him to see her fish that past Saturday evening.
"Wait a minute. Are you... I mean, do you want to cancel our date?"
She doesn’t sleep with her co-workers.
CLARK: I… We… This… It would only have been our second date!
LOIS: And after the second date comes…?
"And it's obvious we have to cancel. We're going to be coworkers!"
"I understood that, but Lois—"
"You understood? Great."
So, we’re in for a game of Mad Dog and Mouse and Cat?
"And why not? No, I know. You think we won't be able to separate things."
Like the chains when they get tied up at work? Or the kissing when they’re undercover as a married couple?
And also that when we break up, it'll be terrible for us to keep working together. "Yes."
It’s very likely that he’ll end up dead long before or shortly thereafter anyway. Lane Luck isn’t transitive.
Our date was the best I've ever had in my life."
Lois sighed. "For me too," she confessed, her voice suddenly shy.
Oh dear. I mean, if they do break up, he could take a job at the Star. It’s almost as good a paper as the Planet now and with Clark working there together with Linda?
LOIS: Maybe we won’t break up. I mean, I never cheated on my boyfriends and I could...well...I’m sure there’s a way to make sure he won’t cheat on me. Like if I’m with him all the time…?
"I won't ruin your fun, farm boy. But when we get tired of seeing each other both inside and outside the Planet, don't say I didn't warn you."
I guess she means ‘when you get tired of seeing me both inside and outside of my clothes’?
"We should discuss the details and fine print of our agreement soon, if we want to move forward with this."
Yes, they have to register their relationship with HR, since Lois will be his immediate supervisor and thus on top of him.
hoping he'd have as much luck on his first day of work as he'd been having so far.
Well...he’s not going to die, so…?
See you in the third story!
Michael
