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Pulitzer
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OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,687 |
 Hope you're still enjoying my story. Not a lot of dialog in this part... and oi.. I hope the little "action scene" wasn't too farfetched!
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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She might be able to appear strong and combative at work, I believe you must mean competitive, here. Combative gives the feeling that she is fighting a war (Well, she is kind of, but I don't think that's what you meant.) Awwww..... the only person she could possibly think of ever letting herself be vulnerable with - other than Superman, probably - was Clark. Awwww.... (again) And if she could possibly manage to get a hug out of this, she would most certainly not complain Hmmm... Now, why didn't Clark hear Lois? Curiouser and curiouser.... Tell her, Clark! Tell her!! Awwww.... So did he! She smiled as she realized she'd managed to get that hug, just as she'd hoped. Why would he do this when he has a lovely balcony? Clark ran into the alley behind his apartment, then spun into the Suit and took off to the sky. Great part!
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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I may have to throw my computer out the window. This is the second duplicate post and about the third duplicate email today. Oops!
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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Pulitzer
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OP
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Posts: 2,687 |
I believe you must mean competitive, here. Combative gives the feeling that she is fighting a war (Well, she is kind of, but I don't think that's what you meant.) Ohh... ok... I'll try to explain I meant... I'm not sure competitive is right for it. Metaphorically I see her like a boxer, you know, with her gloves on and ready to fight - and she's not going to give up. She's fighting to save Superman, litterally. What would be a better word, you think? Hmmm... Now, why didn't Clark hear Lois? Curiouser and curiouser.... Oh... Don't read too much into that. He's just really completely lost in thought, not paying attention *at all* to what's going on. Why would he do this when he has a lovely balcony? Clark ran into the alley behind his apartment, then spun into the Suit and took off to the sky. They left the apartment together, sorry if that wasn't obvious enough. If he ran back inside, she'd think it was suspicious.  So he went in whatever direction was opposite hers and just went in the alley to change. And same reason I made him land back in the alley... If anyone was watching his comings and goings, it would be best if they saw him come back the way he came. Although, I'm not sure it makes much difference where he lands to come back home.
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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Posts: 1,883
Merriwether
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Merriwether
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Posts: 1,883 |
Nice chapter, Lara! it was just the last drop! Did you mean "the last straw"? Of course, it couldn't possibly be his fault that something had come up, but it meant she'd be stuck with lots of extra work, not to mention she needed her partner there for a whole slew of other reasons, besides work. That's right, Lois, you do! And, Lara, the whole next paragraph is so sweet. Well, right up until Lois gets mad that Clark is unreliable, that is!  This whole chapter makes me want to cry for Clark. All his thoughts when Lois comes to the apartment and the city's rejection of him. And then this... How do you say goodbye to the woman you love? owww.... And Toyman, I don't know, he said something about space rats. Nice inside joke!
lisa in the sky with diamonds
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Posts: 2,687 |
it was just the last drop! Did you mean "the last straw"? Ah... geez! What was I thinking! I guess this is a case of lost in translation a bit... In French, the expression is "la goutte qui fait déborder le vase" (the drop that makes the vase overflow -- litteral translation). I'll go fix it. Thanks! This whole chapter makes me want to cry for Clark. All his thoughts when Lois comes to the apartment and the city's rejection of him. now you know how I felt while I was writing it. And Toyman, I don't know, he said something about space rats. Nice inside joke! YAY!! I'm glad someone spotted it! There was one in part 1 that probably noone noticed (but that's OK, it wasn't in L&C, so...), there were 2 little gags in part 4 (the rats and... well... think about it) and there are more to come. When I put all the chapters together, I'll add a list of all the inside jokes at the end.
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Posts: 3,166 |
I kind of liked the 'last drop'. It reminded me of Maxwell House coffee! I noticed the space rats, too. Reminded me of Lois childishly saying, "Mine! You can't have it! It's mine!" or something like that. Ohh... ok... I'll try to explain I meant... I'm not sure competitive is right for it.
Metaphorically I see her like a boxer, you know, with her gloves on and ready to fight - and she's not going to give up. She's fighting to save Superman, litterally.
What would be a better word, you think? Hmmm.... Yes, I know what you are trying to say, but the word isn't coming to me right now. Let me think about it. The good old thesaurus didn't help, either.
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Posts: 2,687 |
I kind of liked the 'last drop'. It reminded me of Maxwell House coffee! hehehehe! Hmmm.... Yes, I know what you are trying to say, but the word isn't coming to me right now. Let me think about it. The good old thesaurus didn't help, either. Ok... how about "determined" or "unwavering" ? I kinda like those...
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,687
Pulitzer
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Posts: 2,687 |
just a quicky little note here... Due to unforceen complications (to say the very least!) It's going to take a little while before I'm able to post part 5. I've just pinched a nerve in my lower back again (story of my life) and I'm in excruciating pain right now. I'm off to the land of pain killers and lying on my stomach with ice packs on my back. I don't know when I'll actually be able to *sit* for one thing... and then it may be a few days before the pain meds stop messing with my head enough for me to *think*. Just noone start thinking I've dropped off the face of the earth or something - it could take as long as one full week...  (getting off my butt and going home from work now. *sigh*)
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166 |
Oooohh... I feel for ya'. I'll say a little prayer.
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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