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#133802 - 04/23/09 07:39 AM Dealing with the Devil
BJ Offline
Top Banana

Registered: 01/27/07
Posts: 1048
Loc: Georgia
Ok, I know I should be writing, but my muse has disappeared. Gone. Kaput. It's been seriously irritating to sit staring at a blank screen for long minutes until I get frustrated enough to stop trying.

So -- in the interim, I've been browsing through the archive (again). Based on one of the Scavenger Hunt answers, I started re-reading Wendy and Kaethel's Whispers from the Dying and came upon this line:
Quote:
If the devil himself appeared in front of her now and offered to let her trade her soul for Clark's life, she wouldn't hesitate.
I know there are a few stories out there that deal with Lois or Clark in the afterlife as ghosts or angels, but none that have placed Lois in the position of making such a bargain with the devil.

Anyone interested?

And if not the devil, there's always Mr. Mxyzptlk. laugh

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#133803 - 04/23/09 10:23 PM Re: Dealing with the Devil
ccmalo Offline
Top Banana

Registered: 09/20/04
Posts: 1302
Loc: Canada
or Luthor.

At the end of S1, Clark says to Lois, "Go on, get in bed with the devil" meaning Luthor.

Also - Luthor's name can be seen as a corruption of Lucifer.

How about wrting it as a comedy?

c.

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#133804 - 04/26/09 01:07 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
MLT Offline
Merriwether

Registered: 04/25/03
Posts: 1652
Loc: Canada
Ooo... I like the idea of writing this as a comedy (not sure I could pull it off - but I certainly like the idea). Can anyone give me a brief synopsis of that famous story where that guy sells his soul to the devil? (Can't even remember the name of the story - let alone what happened shocked )

ML wave
_________________________
She was in such a good mood she let all the pedestrians in the crosswalk get to safety before taking off again.
- CC Aiken, The Late Great Lois Lane

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#133805 - 04/26/09 02:12 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
Darth Michael Offline
Nobel Peace Prize Winner

Registered: 04/30/07
Posts: 7885
You're talking about [url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goethe's_Faust]Goethe's Faust[/url]?

The devil bet with god about being able to corrupt even the most noble of humans (Faust). Tragedy ensures. People die. The LnC analogue would probably be Luthor and Tempus corrupting Clark (or Lois).

Michael
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#133806 - 04/26/09 02:25 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
BJ Offline
Top Banana

Registered: 01/27/07
Posts: 1048
Loc: Georgia
I'd love to see this written as a comedy. How original would that be -- to see a funny twist to TOGOM?

And ML is interested. Woohoo!
dance
I can't summarize any one tale, but Wiki has quite a few links to stories in literature, film and music where someone makes a deal with the devil. Probably one of the more famous is the play The Tragical History of Dr. Faustus by Christopher Marlowe. Never read it, but most people have probably heard of a "Faustian Bargain".

[tangent] And if you haven't -- run to the archive and read it (nFic version available). By Sue S. [/tangent]

My favorite comedic version in film is the movie "Bedazzled" (I've seen both the original with Dudley Moore and the remake with Brendan Frasier and like the latter better) where the hero gets several tries at winning the girl of his dreams, only to be thwarted by a cunning devil. I believe it's the contractual fine print that saves the hero in the end.

Of course, we could throw the TOGOM idea right out and just play with the idea of either character (Clark for Lois -- or Lois for Superman) making such a deal to win the girl/hero of their dreams. Sounds like good fun to me.

Please write it.
grovel

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#133807 - 04/26/09 02:35 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
Darth Michael Offline
Nobel Peace Prize Winner

Registered: 04/30/07
Posts: 7885
Yeah, yeah, yeah... Lois making a deal to get Superman, but things always go wrong, like in Bedazzled. And in the end she figures out she wants Clark, not Superman.

Michael smile1
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I go by Michael on the Archives.

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#133808 - 04/26/09 03:42 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
MLT Offline
Merriwether

Registered: 04/25/03
Posts: 1652
Loc: Canada
Okay, I've come up with a possible opening scene. Don't know if it will go any further than this, but... Well, here it is.

Quote:
A slow stream of smoke lazily drifted towards the ceiling. Kltpzyxm pulled briefly at the rim of his collar. Why did it always have to be kept so hot in here? Deodorant advertisers claiming such things as ‘strong enough for a man’ should get a load of this place. Any deodorant that could do its job in this environment would work anywhere, survive anything. If he himself survived this experience, Kltpzyxm would make it a point to suggest the new advertising strategy. It was a sure-fire winner.

“Don’t just stand there, lurking in the doorway,” said an ominous voice from inside. “Show yourself.”

Kltpzyxm swallowed nervously before taking a step through the door. The room, if it could be called that, was as dreary as it was hot. Rough cut stone walls reflected the glow of a multitude of fires that seemed to burn of their own volition around the room. The man in the room was bathed in dark shadows, hiding his perfectly chiselled features - making him a handsome man if one were to disregard the hard eyes and evidence of cruelty that radiated off his entire being. Kltpzyxm preferred the shadows. After all, looking into those eyes, he always felt as if he were falling into a bottomless pit - one from which his soul might never recover. It was better not to see them.

“You summoned, my liege?” Kltpzyxm asked. The high pitched tone in which the question emerged caused Kltpzyxm to clear his throat, hoping his lord hadn’t noticed. An answering amused chuckle told him he had not been so fortunate. Still, his lord declined to comment. Obviously, he realized that Kltpzyxm was nervous enough and didn’t require any additional sources of terror to ensure absolute allegiance.

“You failed,” the voice from the shadows said instead.

Kltpzyxm took an unconscious step back, his retreat halted by the door slamming shut of its own volition behind him.

“Well, speak up. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“I try...” Kltpzyxm’s voice seemed to shatter into a million pieces. He took a deep breath before speaking again. “I tried. I don’t know what happened. But when his woman managed to break the spell and remember...” His voice trailed off. Damn that woman, anyway. If she hadn’t been there, his plan would have worked perfectly. That over-developed boy-scout would never have been able to break the spell if it weren’t for her. Superman would have left the realm of the normals, ensuring no descendants and no utopia - and no summons of Klpzysm before his supreme-evilness where he would, no doubt, end as a pile of ashes on the floor.

“Excuses!” The figure in shadow, slowly rose to his feet, sending a chill through Klpzyxm in spite of the heat of the room. The figure finally stepped out of the shadows, piercing Klpzyxm with his gaze. “So... what are you going to do about it?”

Unable to look away from his lord’s gaze, it took Klpzyxm a moment to digest the question. Was he really being given a second chance? “Well...” he began slowly, trying desperately to formulate a new plan which might spare his life - such as it was. “...since his woman was the problem, if I were to take care of her before I were to make a move on him, he wouldn’t stand a chance.”

The figure before him smiled, although to call it a smile somewhat stretched the imagination. It was more of a bearing of the teeth, as if he were a tiger preparing to pounce on his unsuspecting victim. “Then do it,” the embodiment of wickedness commanded. “Only, remember the rule. We’ve been denied the power of death.”

Klpzyxm nodded and began to back out of the room. Throughout time, many traditions dictated backing out of the room of the nations’ lords as a sign of respect. But Klpzysm knew the truth. It was merely an act of self preservation, a fear of being attacked from behind if one were to turn his back.
ML wave
_________________________
She was in such a good mood she let all the pedestrians in the crosswalk get to safety before taking off again.
- CC Aiken, The Late Great Lois Lane

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#133809 - 04/26/09 04:09 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
Darth Michael Offline
Nobel Peace Prize Winner

Registered: 04/30/07
Posts: 7885
Oh, you have to spell Mixy in reverse or the entire story would implode while it's in his POV?

As for the rest... Let me just weep at your display of letters that form words that form sentences that leave mere mortals in awe and their Muses hiding in shadows smile1 wink goofy wildguy

Michael

Edit: Interesting addition about being denied the power of death. Like a big disclaimer how far you're willing to go. Little nitpick, though. In Mxymas, several people almost died, would have died if it hadn't been for Clark. So, was Clark intervening something Mxyzpltk counted on or did he break the rules? And will this have consequences?
_________________________
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#133810 - 04/26/09 08:31 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
MLT Offline
Merriwether

Registered: 04/25/03
Posts: 1652
Loc: Canada
I was thinking more like 5 posts. On the other hand, I'm not sure I've ever been able to write a story that's only five posts long shocked .

Quote:
Interesting addition about being denied the power of death. Like a big disclaimer how far you're willing to go. Little nitpick, though. In Mxymas, several people almost died, would have died if it hadn't been for Clark. So, was Clark intervening something Mxyzpltk counted on or did he break the rules? And will this have consequences?
Hmm... good point. I guess I meant it more in a 'you can't kill anyone' way. In Mxymas, one guy tried to commit suicide. And then Jonathan had a heart attack. So it wasn't really Mxy doing the killing. It was the person killing themselves - either willingly or by allowing stress to take over to the point that they died of natural causes. Or making the cercumstances such that nations go to war with each other. So people can kill each other. Mxy can't do it directly.

But maybe I should find a way to reword that. I suppose I could have him say: "You can't murder anyone." But that doesn't sound like a very 'devilish' thing to say. I'll think about that. If you've got any brilliant ideas, feel free to share them.

ML wave
_________________________
She was in such a good mood she let all the pedestrians in the crosswalk get to safety before taking off again.
- CC Aiken, The Late Great Lois Lane

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#133811 - 04/26/09 08:39 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
MLT Offline
Merriwether

Registered: 04/25/03
Posts: 1652
Loc: Canada
Okay, I've got an idea. Here's the rewritten section:

Quote:
“Only, remember the rule. We’ve been denied the power of life and death.”

Klpzyxm nodded. He knew the rule. If people wanted to kill themselves or each other, that was fine. After all, stirring up wars and rumors of wars was the bread and butter of his ilk. But to kill directly was the ultimate no-no. No, he’d have to be more creative than that.
Does that work better?

ML wave
_________________________
She was in such a good mood she let all the pedestrians in the crosswalk get to safety before taking off again.
- CC Aiken, The Late Great Lois Lane

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#133812 - 04/26/09 08:51 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
Darth Michael Offline
Nobel Peace Prize Winner

Registered: 04/30/07
Posts: 7885
Quote:
Originally posted by MLT:
I was thinking more like 5 posts. On the other hand, I'm not sure I've ever been able to write a story that's only five posts long shocked .
Points to various stories in the archives less than 120kB long shocked And btw, when did you sneak "Desperate Times" in there? confused

Not that you should try for a vignette /shakes head vigorously while hoping for at least a month of EOD posts of ML-goodness/

And the new scene works.

Michael smile1
_________________________
I go by Michael on the Archives.

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#133813 - 04/26/09 08:52 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
sarahg Offline
Member

Registered: 04/13/08
Posts: 377
Loc: USA
oh my G-d!!!!! ML is going to write?! me very happy, la la la. now back to work......

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#133814 - 04/26/09 10:55 AM Re: Dealing with the Devil
MLT Offline
Merriwether

Registered: 04/25/03
Posts: 1652
Loc: Canada
Quote:
oh my G-d!!!!! ML is going to write?! me very happy, la la la. now back to work......
laugh

Actually, I've now written all I can... until I watch Twas The Night Before Mxymas again laugh . I've got to get Mxyzpltk's voice right - so that I can hear him in my head when I'm writing.

ML wave
_________________________
She was in such a good mood she let all the pedestrians in the crosswalk get to safety before taking off again.
- CC Aiken, The Late Great Lois Lane

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#133815 - 04/26/09 01:44 PM Re: Dealing with the Devil
BJ Offline
Top Banana

Registered: 01/27/07
Posts: 1048
Loc: Georgia
Wow, talk about nearly instant gratification! ML, I was so excited to see that your muse was tickled by this idea and was impressed with how quickly you wrote the opening scene.

I love the way you set the stage, visually...
Quote:
A slow stream of smoke lazily drifted towards the ceiling...

and

Rough cut stone walls reflected the glow of a multitude of fires that seemed to burn of their own volition around the room.
As well as set the tone for the story...

Quote:
Deodorant advertisers claiming such things as ‘strong enough for a man’ should get a load of this place.
thumbsup

I bow to your greatness and can hardly wait for more.
hail
Brenda

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#133816 - 04/26/09 02:23 PM Re: Dealing with the Devil
IolantheAlias Offline
Pulitzer

Registered: 02/23/08
Posts: 2823
I agree with previous poster - I love how you've appealed to the senses in the description! Smell (the deodorant), sight (the darkness), etc.

Please, post more! This intro is just too good not to go on.

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