FDK: Rebuilding Superman 12/20 - 01/10/07 10:58 AM
Since I have so very little time these days, I'm afraid this will be short.
Your writing is so intense and captivating. You make me feel so strongly how the prosecution and the defense make Yolanda paint such different pictures of what happened to her on the night that Bill Church was killed by Superman. Actually, we can see that Yolanda's description of Superman's behaviour is consistently the same, but the reason for her fear of him is seen to change drastically when she is questioned by the defense. The drama and emotional tension is palpable. This, to me, is undoubtedly the high point of an excellent chapter:
That packed an incredible punch. Yolanda was utterly shaken by what Connie had said to her. But Connie was extremely shaken by what she herself had said, too:
I think Connie found it hard to accept the punitive, scary role she was forced to assume here. It was emotionally draining, and I think she scared herself as well as Yolanda. I'm certainly not saying she did the wrong thing, though. Indeed, her performance was incredibly impressive.
By the way, I love how the defense has demonstrated so effectively that the prosecution's first two witnesses were thoroughly criminal themselves.
This entire chapter was full of intense emotions. There is Lois throwing up her coffee and having to accept that she has just broken Ron's heart by telling him that she is his friend, and therefore, by implicaiton, not his future lover or wife. And there is the closing scene where Lois and Superman so much want to touch each other and relax in each other's arms and comfort one another, but they have to uphold the pretense that they are - well, just friends.
And in the next chapter - chapter thirteen, the unlucky number - Lois is going to have to testify. Her testimony could very well ruin Superman's future and her own relationship with Clark and their chance of being happy together.
This is so tense and so extremely well written.
Ann
Your writing is so intense and captivating. You make me feel so strongly how the prosecution and the defense make Yolanda paint such different pictures of what happened to her on the night that Bill Church was killed by Superman. Actually, we can see that Yolanda's description of Superman's behaviour is consistently the same, but the reason for her fear of him is seen to change drastically when she is questioned by the defense. The drama and emotional tension is palpable. This, to me, is undoubtedly the high point of an excellent chapter:
Quote
“Don’t fear Superman unless you break the law, Yolanda. And if you do break the law – “ she paused to take a breath “ – the people will try you and convict you and send you to jail for a long, long time. Fear me, Yolanda!”
Connie gritted her teeth and leaned over the rail until Yolanda fell backwards into the chair. “You’d better fear me. Because I’m one of the people!”
Connie gritted her teeth and leaned over the rail until Yolanda fell backwards into the chair. “You’d better fear me. Because I’m one of the people!”
Quote
“Connie?” he asked. She didn’t say anything. He gently touched her shoulder. “Connie, are you all right?”
Instead of answering, she stood and stormed past him. He looked at Blair questioningly, but she shrugged her shoulders. “Don’t know what’s wrong. I got an idea, but I want to talk to her first. You be here tomorrow at nine, okay?”
He turned to watch Connie slam through the door at the back of the courtroom. “You sure she’ll be okay?”
“No. But even if she goes down, you still got me.”
Instead of answering, she stood and stormed past him. He looked at Blair questioningly, but she shrugged her shoulders. “Don’t know what’s wrong. I got an idea, but I want to talk to her first. You be here tomorrow at nine, okay?”
He turned to watch Connie slam through the door at the back of the courtroom. “You sure she’ll be okay?”
“No. But even if she goes down, you still got me.”
By the way, I love how the defense has demonstrated so effectively that the prosecution's first two witnesses were thoroughly criminal themselves.
This entire chapter was full of intense emotions. There is Lois throwing up her coffee and having to accept that she has just broken Ron's heart by telling him that she is his friend, and therefore, by implicaiton, not his future lover or wife. And there is the closing scene where Lois and Superman so much want to touch each other and relax in each other's arms and comfort one another, but they have to uphold the pretense that they are - well, just friends.
And in the next chapter - chapter thirteen, the unlucky number - Lois is going to have to testify. Her testimony could very well ruin Superman's future and her own relationship with Clark and their chance of being happy together.
This is so tense and so extremely well written.
Ann
