FDK: Panem 1/? - Lois & Clark Fanfic Message Boards

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Anne,

To quote one of my favorite characters: "We come to serve"

I like this idea - enjoyed The HG books, though the movie was meh. Liking your writing & the story so far.

Ooh. I'm really liking where this story is heading. Will Clark win? Will Lois be brought into the picture? Will his powers be revealed? Will they start some sort of revolution together? So much to read and find out, and I can't wait for any of it!

Your writing style is delicious and suspenseful! The Smallville we all know and love has vanished, replaced by a tragic community still reeling from the world's destruction.

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For the first ten years of Clark’s life, he had seemed like any other kid—healthier than most, a little stronger than his age mates, perhaps a little smarter, too—but essentially like everyone else. A few people had remarked upon his lack of resemblance to his father, but the Kents were respected members of the community, so no one said it loudly—and no one said it for long. The midwife who cared for his mother during each of her three subsequent pregnancies—none of which yielded a living child—had been quick to defend the Kents and quash any rumors.

With these sentence we see the midwife and the community of District 9 silently accept this 'child of the Kents' without hesitation. Bravo to the midwife by the way; it took a lot of guts to stand up to the Peacekeepers. Poor Martha, to endure six pregnancies and never to give birth to a living child. It must have been so very painful for them.

The description of the years passing while Clark discovers and learns to harness his abilities is well done. Despite the fact that many things are different, the Kent family happily remains comfortably familiar.

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And that meant keeping his extraordinary abilities a secret.

Ya think?! With a government run by madmen and Trask somewhere in the shadows?

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When they reached the eighteen-year-old section, they separated, Rachel and Lana going to stand with the girls and Clark and Pete going to stand with the boys. Before the group split up, Lana gave Pete a quick kiss, then looked at the others. “Last time,” she reminded them. “And may the odds be in all of our favors.”

Wait a second! Pete is interested in Lana - even plans on asking her to marry him. So why is Lana kissing Clark good-bye?

Poor Becky!

What is a tesserae? I have not read The Hunger Games so there are some terms I am not familiar with.

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Slowly, head held high, Clark detached himself from the rest of the eighteen-year-olds and headed for the stage. He stood beside Becky and looked out at the people of District 9.

Oh no!

This is a fascinating world you have created. Possibly even a series of stories. I eagerly look forward to the next installment.

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Originally posted by Morgana:
Wait a second! Pete is interested in Lana - even plans on asking her to marry him. So why is Lana kissing Clark good-bye?

No, it's Pete she kissed.

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What is a tesserae? I have not read The Hunger Games so there are some terms I am not familiar with.

A tesserae is a meager ration of grain and oil taken out by kids of Reaping age for their families in exchange for more entries in the Reaping bowl.

Oops!

I stand corrected. Serves me right for not looking back and reading the line again!

Oh wow! Poor Becky! Her family must have put a lot of slips into the bowl. How will her story play in this fic?

I haven't read The Hunger Games, but I saw the movie. I was underwhelmed by the movie, given all the hype about it. It was ok, and it was entertaining, but it just didn't even remotely live up to the story's reputation.

That said, you've set up an engaging scenario here. I like the way you've put the Smallville we're familiar with into this different setting. I also like the way you gave Clark a plausible reason not to volunteer. He can be reasonably sure that he would survive, but he has a solid motive to stay quiet because in saving one boy, he would risk his whole district.

I'm eager to see how the story plays out. Will Clark be able to fake it and keep his secret? Will he actually kill anyone, or will he try to stay hidden and wait it out? What hazards might give him away as different? Would they notice any thing unusual about him before the actual games start? Given that he is actually an alien and not a Capitol experiment, would there be any retaliation towards his parents or his district if he is outed? And will Lois be another contestant? I'm thinking he'll meet her and fall for her, and he'll try to protect her during the game, but she won't want him around.

I guess I'll just have to wait and see!

As a side note, it's easier to read and less confusing when you explain jargon from the story and not assume that your readers are familiar with The Hunger Games. Most of it you did a good job with explaining, but I was confused about the extra food rations for the teenagers. I was able to figure out what you probably meant, but it took a bit to puzzle it out.

Excellent start! Good setup, we know that Clark has the traditional powers and that he's going to find it hard to conceal his abilities in the arena.

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I enjoyed The HG books, though the movie was meh.

I think it would be very hard to adapt the book to the screen, because so much of the book is first-person inner dialogue and how Katniss feels. I thought Jennifer Lawrence did a good job of conveying a lot of that, but of course she couldn't get across all the subtleties and depth of the book.

One thing which I thought the movie did very well was using costuming and makeup to show the decadence of the Capitol - I liked how the Capitolites had weird hair colors, tattoos, jewelry, etc. Juxtapose that against the worn denim of the hard-working inhabitants of Katniss's district - it's a huge contrast.

Hey!

Today marks one year that this fantastic story has been posting! I am lovin' it! Keep writing AnnieB!