I'm a bit late posting in this thread but I had to say I loved the adaptation. Lois' comments were fun and completely in-character - gave the rules perspective and some comedic sense of homogeneity. Great work, VirginiaR!!
Rule #15: Chumpy is a word.
- Yes, it is. Just look it up in your dictionary. It’s there.
- PS: Don’t use it to describe me.
Clark set down the list and walked over to his bookcase where he removed his dictionary. Sure enough, penciled into the margin in Lois’s handwriting was:
Chumpy (adj): someone who’s a chump.
This is soooo Lois.
“Leash? Concubine?” Clark asked.
Wells shifted from one foot to another. “Perhaps it’s not wise to know too much about one's future,” he said elusively.
“Uh-huh,” Clark replied. Obviously he and Herb were going to have a serious discussion later that evening before he left.
Poor Wells...
Doesn't Alt-Clark wonder where Lois' ability to x-ray something autonomously came from? Or did he quit questioning the rules since so many of them refer to unimaginable and strange happenings of his counterpart's life?
Rule #76 - If you like Lois with long hair, don't introduce her to Tank Wilson.
- Who is this Tank Wilson that Clark keeps mentioning? Is he a source of Perry’s?
- (after quick internet search) Oh, my God. Did you know that there’s a man out there who’s got some kind of weird hair fetish with me? I’m glad Clark’s already keeping an eye on him.
- I do have to agree with him that I have a nice neck though.
Lois' comments about finding who Tank Wilson is are priceless. I can almost picture her panicked/ shocked face and then her look when she concludes he's right about her neck...
#92 - Keep Lois away from any kind of blonde. They won't get along.
This was a very sensible rule in the first place.
The added exceptions make it even better and the exclusion of Ellen Lane make it great (poor Ellen, though).
- I take vacations; isn’t that what weekends are?
#96 - Feed her fish. She will often forget about them in the pursuit of a story.
- I feed my fish! Never have I ever killed my fish during the pursuit of a story! That’s what I love about them, they’re self-sufficient pets.
#97 - If said fish meet their timely (or untimely) end, comfort Lois and help her find new ones to torture erm... nurture.
- The only time I can recall losing any fish is when he was exposed to red Kryptonite and his powers went haywire because he could no longer control them, and it had been an accident. I forgave him. It hadn’t been his fault. The only reason I needed comforting was because I was worried about my husband, not about my… my… fish, who had been my friends and company for years, who I could talk to when my life went crazy… and I’m not crying over dead fish!
Wonderful thoughts on Lois' part. When I read about her crying into the notebook I actually felt guilty about implying Lois didn't care for her fish and even worse for implying Clark didn't care for Lois' fish...
Clark’s jaw dropped. “We can’t have children?” he stammered. “It’s impossible?”
“You know, I’ve never liked that word,” Wells said and smiled knowingly. “No, not impossible.”
“Not…” Clark’s eyes dropped down to the other Clark’s last rule.
&
- Don’t tell Clark, but I’m pregnant! I’m telling him at dinner. Shhhhh, it’s a secret.
I loved what you did with this last part. It's wonderful.
He closed the Handbook and set it down on his desk, crossing his arms. “Now, I believe there are some things we need to discuss.”
H.G. Wells blanched at the intensity of Clark’s gaze and cleared his throat. “You know, Clark, it isn’t good to know too much about your future.”
“Uh-huh,” Clark said. “Too late for excuses, Herb. Get talking. Let’s start with this ‘curse’.”
Well done for Alt-Clark! Loved the ending (and Wells got what he deserved).
.)
Anyway, for some reason, I cannot see Clark responding to Lois's rules with snarky comments. Mumblings under his breath, maybe, but not snarky comments.
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