FDK: An Award Winning Story (1/2) - Lois & Clark Fanfic Message Boards

Feel free to make any comments you have in here, but try to be nice!

EDIT: Oops, forgot to put the parts in the subject. D'oh! It's been a while since I last did this

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Hi Alisha,

Thanks for the ficathon fic. Better late than never.

And I certainly understand how RL can interfere with fun stuff like fiction writing. I'm glad things are settling down for you, and I hope Aoife is home to stay.

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“I’d say you’ve got more than enough character already.”

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“Do I not normally look stunning?”

Aw, Lois, give the guy a break!

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“Good. So I can tell you that I think you’ll make a better arm ornament than I would have, and you’ll take it as a complement.”

Gotcha, Lois! (A minor spelling correction, if I may: I think you meant 'compliment'.)

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“The best I can come up with is a raisin.”

This line alone made the story well worth the wait. I'm sorry for providing prompts that proved to be so challenging, but you definitely rose to the challenge. I am *thoroughly* enjoying this story. Thank you!

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He looked over at Lois, enjoying her meal as his raisin. No, he felt as if he had already won.

Awww.

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Just how bad could this fire be?

Uh oh.

Any idea when you will post part two?

Joy,
Lynn

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And suddenly, despite his teasing of her initial reaction to his being nominated instead of her, Lois felt herself relax. “Clark, this is how you should behave. No formality, just... you. And you can tell me I’m stunning if you like.”

He looked at her. Really looked at her. Then looked at the back of the seat in front. “You know you look stunning, Lois. You don’t need me to tell you that.”

She felt her cheeks start to burn slightly. Why did she care that how Clark thought she looked? Why, when she had been getting dressed, had it seemed so important to her to look good for him? She’d known that he wouldn’t care what she wore, that he would still have taken her if she had decided to wear her gym clothes. He still would have called her stunning. She felt her heart rate pick up.

Oh, I really like how you get Lois's thoughts and how much she cares what Clark thinks of her and how she thinks she ought not to care but she really does care so she beats herself up about it. And then she realizes, Hey, he's just Clark, and it's just so sweet.

You have that down just exactly right.

This is wonderful so far! Seriously

at the "raisin" thing. I can't wait to see where this goes!

And uh, Clark, you *know* never to think "just how bad" can a situation be. Tsk tsk!

Thanks for your comments guys!

Lynn:

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(A minor spelling correction, if I may: I think you meant 'compliment'.)

Yes I did :rolleyes: . Thanks for pointing that out.
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- Alisha

Yay! You posted it!

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thank you again to Brenda for betaing this fic

It was absolutely my pleasure. I'm just glad to see that it wasn't my comments that ran you off.

I don't know if I mentioned it before, but I absolutely adore your depiction of Lois and Clark on this outing to the Kerth Awards dinner. It's awkward and the perfect leader to the will they/won't they of dating.

I really liked the changes you made. Here are some of my favorite bits:

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“You know what Clark? I’m struggling to think of someone else I’d put myself in this situation for.

This is so telling of how much Lois likes Clark. Who else, indeed?

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She smiled. “And I prefer comfy country Clark to award-winning tux-wearing Clark.”

“Oh, I know *that*,” he practically laughed, giving her a quick flash of his pearly white teeth.

Happy sigh. This is so in-character. I can totally see and hear this exchange happening.

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“Good. So I can tell you that I think you’ll make a better arm ornament than I would have, and you’ll take it as a complement.”

She stared at his serious face that was trying so hard not to smile. “Thank you, Clark.”

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He looked over at Lois, enjoying her meal as his raisin. No, he felt as if he had already won.

Clark is also soft and sweet. Can I have one?

More soon, please.

Brenda

Loved the whole thing especially the raisin! LOL! Great job. Laura

Looking forward to Part 2

Some really fun descriptives being used! Really enjoying your story very much. Can't wait for the next part.

In this next phrase, are you sure you want the word "prize"?

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"...had to be to prize Perry away from the Planet..."

Looking forward to more. Thank you to you and your muse!

Yay, more feedback!

BJ:

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I'm just glad to see that it wasn't my comments that ran you off.

As if! Honestly, if I was the sort of person who'd run off after reading a beta's comments, then I wouldn't use one!

Laura:

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Loved the whole thing especially the raisin! LOL!

I'm so glad that the raisin thing works.

HappyGirl:

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Looking forward to Part 2

Part 2 is sitting ready to go on my laptop. I will be posting it soon.

Evelyn:

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In this next phrase, are you sure you want the word "prize"?

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"...had to be to prize Perry away from the Planet..."

Yes, I am fairly certain prize is the right word there. Unless you're telling me that 'to prize something away from something' is a Britishism, in which case I may not and will edit that bit. I'm glad you're enjoying the story.

Thanks again for all the comments, guys, I'm so glad you're all enjoying this story. Part 2 is coming up.

- Alisha

Loved this part to bits! And the raisin thing and Lois and Clark's in-joke was so

Loved the 'Raisin!" Great!

Oh, no, not on Kerth award night! Not a fire. What's going to happen if Clark's not there to accept his award?

Will Lois have to do his acceptance speach? (Like she doesn't have one tucked away in her purse for occasions like this?)

Ok. On to part 2 to find out...

I think the spelling is "prise" someone away from something.

World English Dictionary
prise or prize (praɪz) [Click for IPA pronunciation guide]

— vb
1. to force open by levering
2. to extract or obtain with difficulty: they had to prise the news out of him

— n
3. rare , dialect or a tool involving leverage in its use or the leverage so employed

[C17: from Old French prise a taking, from prendre to take, from Latin prehendere; see prize 1 ]

prize or prize

— vb

— n

[C17: from Old French prise a taking, from prendre to take, from Latin prehendere; see prize 1 ]

But I guess "prize" is an alternate spelling. I'd recommend using "prise" here because otherwise it's confusing with the Pulitzer Prize and the Kerth Awards.

Thank you for the new comments.

DW:

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Loved this part to bits!

Iolanthe:
Yes, you're right, that should have been 'prise' not 'prize'. Well done to you and Evelyn for pointing that out and correcting it for me, and I apologise for any confusion my bad spelling has inflicted on you poor readers!

- Alisha

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She should take the stupid dress off, put on her brown robe and eat chocolate ice cream; that would show the stupid judging panel a thing or two.

Beauty pageant?

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She’d already behaved badly enough over this Kerth award thing; she couldn’t bear to let him down now.

Oh...

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“Thanks. Now, let me just check, you like to be the best at everything, right?”

“You know I do. And you’re happy to be second best, that’s why we work together so well.”

“Good. So I can tell you that I think you’ll make a better arm ornament than I would have, and you’ll take it as a complement.”

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“I could never have brought a grudging date with me. I prefer something smaller, sweeter, without a hard centre.”

Yeah, otherwise he'd have shown up with Mayson, huh? Okay, she's about the same size as Lois. But more sticky than sweet, and she's got a stick up a certain place? Hmm... yep, qualifies as a date

Michael