And left because of guilt? Clark wouldn't want anyone to be killed--and even if it were to save Lois, I imagine he'd be torn up over the fact that he hadn't gotten the save exactly right.

Aha! I thought things might lead in this direction...

I can't imagine this all getting tied up in one more part... there's a longer story here and I encourage you to write it. Not to make your life harder, but I'd like to see this story stretched out a bit--like show us exactly the circumstances that led up to L&C sleeping together, especially with Clark having amnesia...And I'd like to know why Lois is bothering with Lex at all since she slept with Clark--I don't know... I just think you got a good thing here and could go deeper! And if you need a beta-reader, I'm available!


Errata (you asked for it ) If you ask, I can't help but notice... if you don't mention it, then I can usually skip over them. :rolleyes:

(a little subjective, but...)

What a fantastic first half of a story. I'm not sure how you'll be able to wrap everything up in just one more part, but I am eager to find out.

By the way, if you wish to add italics into a story, put an open bracket-i-close bracket before the part to be italicized, and an open bracket-forward slash-i-close bracket after it, like this:

[ i] this[ /i]

You will need to remove the extraneous spaces I placed after the open brackets. I needed to put them in there, or else the MB would have italicized the word this.

Joy,
Lynn

This is a great start! I will say that it does seem like the beginning of more than a two-parter. In any event, I'm looking forward to more.

So, Lois sleeps with Clark. Two months later, her skirts are tight and bullets are ricocheting off her head.

I agree with everyone else - one more part is not enough!

Looking forward to part 2.

Great first part! I'd love to see this stretched out to more than a 2-parter though. I think you've got a great story brewing her. Although, I have to admit, I was suspicious of Lois straight from the start when her knees gave out when the gunman grabbed her.

Please post part 2 soon!!!

Thanks for the comments! I appreciate the typo-finds, mozartmind -- my brain just ends up not seeing them after a while.

I'll go ahead and post part 2, and you guys can tell me if you think it comes to a satisfactory completion. If not, well, I may have to feed my muse a bit of extra chocolate!

What a neat premise! Can't wait to see how you tie it all together.

Joan

So Clark sleeps with Lois, and then runs out on her the next morning. No wonder she doesn't want to talk about it. She's good at denying and repressing.

What scares me is that she's hanging out with Lex Luthor way too much.

Interesting premise. Hmmm. Nightfall, Clark + Lois... = superpowered Lois. Hmmmm. What else might be going on here?

Maybe there's another reason that Lois is looking so beautiful... could it be that extra heartbeat?

How will you wrap this up? Off to find out.