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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,131
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,131 |
WHAM warning but with a little twinkle of hope? No? Maybe?  Hmm. How about, WHAM warning with not-so-subtle notes of songfic? (I did bury some lyrics in there somewhere, brownie points if you find them.) Song reference is, of course, Jimmy Olsen's Blues by the Spin Doctors, although taken with a darker slant. Oldie but goodie.  Thoughts go here. 
Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eye witness.
--Mark Twain
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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 825 |
Mouse... bravo! The plot, the character development, the raw emotion... all brilliant. You really captured Clark’s goodness, Jimmy’s anguish and the terrible situation perfectly  You had me in tears by the end!
"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 571 Likes: 12
Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 571 Likes: 12 |
I love Jimmy Olsen's Blues and Pocket Full of Kryptonite. Those songs bring me back to the 90's and the show, my high school days, and of simpler times.
Now the plot of this story is just Woah! I love it. It reminds me of the line Jimmy said in "Just Say Noah" when he admitted he always had a crush on her. The tragedy of the story, the heartbreak of the loss. You make us feel such pain for Jimmy, the loss of a lost love that he never really had. Wonderful. Tragedy. So many words, yet lost for words.
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,114
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,114 |
Wow ... just wow. What a powerful, moving story.
"Oh, you can’t help that," said the Cat: "we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad."
"How do you know I’m mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn’t have come here.”
- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,131
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,131 |
NK: Thanks! Happy to hear the characterizations turned out good. I struggled with an ending on this one, so I'm glad you liked it. CarrieRene: That little line in "Just Say Noah" is what paired this song to the story so well in my mind. Glad you enjoyed! Annie B: Thanks! 
Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eye witness.
--Mark Twain
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
Here, I came back to the boards to see if I could find a nice romantic holiday story and I get hit by a WHAM! I, of course, knew what I was getting into, due to your warning, but how could I resist a Mouse story? I couldn't, because despite the WHAM I knew it would be a good read. And, in that department, I wasn't disappointed.
So much pain all around. Jimmy has certainly waded too deeply in Lois's dark waters (you know, those waters she jumps into without testing first). A bad year? Understatement much? The only thing that could've made it worse was if Jimmy had killed Lois himself. Poor Clark. Horrible year. First he loses Lois, then Jimmy, and now his kids lives are in danger and yet, he still finds a way to be himself.
At first, I thought that Jimmy (after I realized it was Jimmy) had somehow married Lois and these were HIS and Lois's kids he was talking to (ala How I Met Your Mother). And, I thought, "Whoa! Jimmy killed Clark! Did he do that on purpose? Did he win Lois by comforting her after she lost Clark?"
Well written. There is hope there, even if it is only a small pocketful.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 4,025 |
Hey Mouse Glad to see you had one more surprise up your sleeve before the new year hit. And what a HIT! Holy cow! You had me going there for awhile. At first I thought it was Clark then I was like wait no what if it's Dan? Then no it was Jimmy. I am over here bawling my eyes out from the emotional whiplash. Holy cow! Poor Clark! Poor Jimmy! Poor kids being subjected to that by their uncle after their mom's death. WTH? Glad it had a somewhat happy ending, but still... wow!!
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