Been away for a while and I come back to find this beast waiting for me. Excellent tale, DC, and very well told. My favorite line came from H.G. Wells:
Quote
There's no telling what might happen when we rewrite that story.
You're right, there isn't. And when we rewrite something on these boards, there's no telling what might come out. But I'm glad you straightened out the toys and put them back in the box neatly. In fact, you even unraveled one episode arc completely! I think you should write "Injustice Denied" and tell the real story of how Lois and Clark caught a corrupt district attorney and the criminal who dangled the bait in front of him.
Had I been Clark, I'm pretty sure I would have snatched Lois before she got to the execution chamber. Fewer people around to see it happen that way, and Clemmons would have been embarrassed right out of office.
I'm a little fuzzy on the timeline, though. I would have thought that Bruce Wayne would have "aged out" of being Batman by the time Clark made his suicide attempt. But then, you didn't actually state that he was still the Dark Knight, did you? Maybe he'd moved into the role of mentoring his replacement by then.
(What do you call Batman's dog? The Bark Knight! Ha-ha-ha -- oops. Bad joke syndrome.)
You whacked a lot of people in this story. I did wonder if Lucy ever turned up again or if she vanished permanently. I'd guess that her dad didn't even try to find her since he had his own guilty tragedy to deal with.
Powerful story, DC. Keep up the great work!
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
Interesting take on the story. As Terry said you decomposed the story arc nicely drawing it to its natural conclusion complete with the death and destruction and then fixed it. I would have liked to see it continue with how Lois and Clark turned the tables on Clemmons.
Like Terry I kept thinking how dense Clark is to even allow Lois to get to the death chamber and hooked up to the IVs. I guess that is why he always needed Lois, she would have come up with some less risky way to have gotten her out of this. It is probably because he relies so much on his powers. Many times Clark gets into bad situations just because he relies on the fact that he is Superman and he always tries to do the 'heroic' thing rather than taking the easier way out. In one fic I remember when Lois had UltraWoman's powers she would come to a scene, zoom down, take the guns away, tywrap the criminals up at super speed, and then show herself. Clark always would fly in, stop, and call out the criminals. Lois always figured that was exposing him(or her during this timeframe) and there was nothing gained by that. In that fic, even Clarked agreed that maybe she was on to something there.
Anyway, I was not sure I would like the story with the way it began but the story was totally compelling and believable the way you laid it out complete with the death and destruction. It probably would have worked well if you had ended it with Clark passing away in his sleep because you had already taken care of Clemmons but a middle of the night visit by Herb is always appreciated.
Any reason why you posted it in one thread instead of three parts? It would have worked well with the cliffhangers you so enjoy producing to have split the story into 3 chapters.
Great job!
Mike
Last edited by Mike M; 07/17/1609:02 AM.
Create all the happiness you are able to create. Remove all the misery you are able to remove.
Powerful story! I actually liked it for all of its darkness - it's unique and different and, as you've laid it out here, totally believable. It really shows the impact of depression, how a person can be thrown into despair and then spiral out of control. Kudos to you for handling this material in a thoughtful way.
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie.
Wow!!! Compelling story. Angst, angst and more angst. Then you managed to find a way to fix it. Best use of a dream I've seen in a long time. Masterfully done! Yay Herb! I can't help wondering if he or his counterparts are going to help the other Clarks.
Cuidadora
"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor
"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly
Been away for a while and I come back to find this beast waiting for me. Excellent tale, DC, and very well told. My favorite line came from H.G. Wells:
Quote
There's no telling what might happen when we rewrite that story.
You're right, there isn't. And when we rewrite something on these boards, there's no telling what might come out. But I'm glad you straightened out the toys and put them back in the box neatly. In fact, you even unraveled one episode arc completely! I think you should write "Injustice Denied" and tell the real story of how Lois and Clark caught a corrupt district attorney and the criminal who dangled the bait in front of him.
Had I been Clark, I'm pretty sure I would have snatched Lois before she got to the execution chamber. Fewer people around to see it happen that way, and Clemmons would have been embarrassed right out of office.
I'm a little fuzzy on the timeline, though. I would have thought that Bruce Wayne would have "aged out" of being Batman by the time Clark made his suicide attempt. But then, you didn't actually state that he was still the Dark Knight, did you? Maybe he'd moved into the role of mentoring his replacement by then.
(What do you call Batman's dog? The Bark Knight! Ha-ha-ha -- oops. Bad joke syndrome.)
You whacked a lot of people in this story. I did wonder if Lucy ever turned up again or if she vanished permanently. I'd guess that her dad didn't even try to find her since he had his own guilty tragedy to deal with.
Powerful story, DC. Keep up the great work!
Thank you for the feedback, Terry! Glad you enjoyed the story.
I'll definitely think about continuing on. My muse has nothing to offer yet, but I always keep those little ideas tucked away in the back of my mind.
As for Clark letting Lois get to the execution chamber before taking action...well, I imagined that a couple of things would play into that. 1) Clark would have been working up until the time of the execution to clear Lois' name. 2) He would have had enough faith in the justice system to belief that "the phone call" would come in and Lois would be pardoned/spared from execution. When both of those things failed to save her, it caused him to lose his faith in the justice system completely, and drowned him in guilt.
I'm envisioning Bruce and Clark as very close in age. (I blame the Justice League cartoons, where they appear to have very little difference in ages.) At most, maybe Bruce is 10 years older. So, Clark would be 29 at the time of Lois' death (the episodes take place before the one which has Lois trying to pull off a surprise 30th birthday party for him). 15 years later, when Clark attempts suicide, he would be 44. Making Bruce anywhere from 44 to 54...not too old to still be an active Batman. And even if he wasn't actively do superhero work, I picture him as one of the heads of the League and possible trainer/mentor to other heroes.
Nice joke. I'll have to pass it on to my husband. He's a sucker for bad jokes.
I DID kill a bunch of people, huh? My muse loved it! In my head, Lucy never turned up again. Probably went and changed her name so as not to be associated with any of what went on. I can envision some kind of downward spiral for Sam too, quite possibly leading to his death. (Self blame for being a terrible father, all the years wasted when he and Lois barely spoke, etc.)
Thanks again for reading!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
Interesting take on the story. As Terry said you decomposed the story arc nicely drawing it to its natural conclusion complete with the death and destruction and then fixed it. I would have liked to see it continue with how Lois and Clark turned the tables on Clemmons.
Like Terry I kept thinking how dense Clark is to even allow Lois to get to the death chamber and hooked up to the IVs. I guess that is why he always needed Lois, she would have come up with some less risky way to have gotten her out of this. It is probably because he relies so much on his powers. Many times Clark gets into bad situations just because he relies on the fact that he is Superman and he always tries to do the 'heroic' thing rather than taking the easier way out. In one fic I remember when Lois had UltraWoman's powers she would come to a scene, zoom down, take the guns away, tywrap the criminals up at super speed, and then show herself. Clark always would fly in, stop, and call out the criminals. Lois always figured that was exposing him(or her during this timeframe) and there was nothing gained by that. In that fic, even Clarked agreed that maybe she was on to something there.
Anyway, I was not sure I would like the story with the way it began but the story was totally compelling and believable the way you laid it out complete with the death and destruction. It probably would have worked well if you had ended it with Clark passing away in his sleep because you had already taken care of Clemmons but a middle of the night visit by Herb is always appreciated.
Any reason why you posted it in one thread instead of three parts? It would have worked well with the cliffhangers you so enjoy producing to have split the story into 3 chapters.
Great job!
Mike
Hi, Mike!
I'm surprised to see you here. I know you like the lighter stuff, as opposed to dark stories, like this one. But I'm glad you gave it a chance.
I never say never to a story idea. It's just a matter of if my muse takes the bait. (She's currently working on a couple of things.)
As I said to Terry, I can see Clark 1) working right up to the last minute to clear her name and 2) believing that the phone would ring and Lois would be granted a reprieve. I don't think he ever truly believed that Lois wouldn't be cleared and that she'd actually be killed.
Interesting idea that he would need Lois to devise a less risky plan. It rings true, doesn't it? Clark DOES tend to take more risks as Superman - probably in an attempt to be forthright with people (no sneak attacks on the criminals, giving them a chance to surrender). But I can see Lois deemed that an unnecessary risk.
I DID consider leaving the story with Clark's death, but it felt like it was lacking. I'm usually not a fan of "it was all just a dream" endings, but this one felt right - because it's more than a dream, it's the reality that WILL happen if Lois fails to prevent it.
As for your last question - I always envisioned this as a one-shot. I thought about posting it over three days, but I thought it worked better as one, cohesive piece posted all together.
Thanks for reading!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
Powerful story! I actually liked it for all of its darkness - it's unique and different and, as you've laid it out here, totally believable. It really shows the impact of depression, how a person can be thrown into despair and then spiral out of control. Kudos to you for handling this material in a thoughtful way.
Thanks, Susan! I'm glad you liked it. And I'm glad it rang as believable and true. One of the reasons why I had my husband take a look at it before I posted was because he suffers from depression. (That and he seemed intrigued when I told him I was writing a story in which Superman tries to take his own life.)
Thanks for the feedback!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
Wow!!! Compelling story. Angst, angst and more angst. Then you managed to find a way to fix it. Best use of a dream I've seen in a long time. Masterfully done! Yay Herb! I can't help wondering if he or his counterparts are going to help the other Clarks.
Thank you for reading! Glad you enjoyed it and the "dream" ending. I do believe Herb would be on a mission to save ALL of the other Clarks.
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
I'm really glad to have read this today. At first reading, when things were getting bad, then really bad, then horribly bad for Clark, I really was planning to brace for a very sad ending. I just didn't see any way for it not to end like that. And I appreciated the story non the less--for how different it was from what's normally posted.
And then, the ending . Love it! Normally the 'dream' fix isn't one of my favorites, but in this case? Perfect! It worked--SO WELL! ...
And I really admire how you worked the solution so well into solving an episode dilemma. Problem solved--and happily ever after! Woo-hoo!
I'm really glad to have read this today. At first reading, when things were getting bad, then really bad, then horribly bad for Clark, I really was planning to brace for a very sad ending. I just didn't see any way for it not to end like that. And I appreciated the story non the less--for how different it was from what's normally posted.
And then, the ending . Love it! Normally the 'dream' fix isn't one of my favorites, but in this case? Perfect! It worked--SO WELL! ...
And I really admire how you worked the solution so well into solving an episode dilemma. Problem solved--and happily ever after! Woo-hoo!
Great job! Laura
Thanks for giving this one a chance! I was afraid the darkness of it would be a turn-off for people.
I really did plan on it ending with Clark's death, but it just didn't feel right. Then the "dream" idea hit me and I knew I had to go with it.
Glad you enjoyed it - I had a blast writing it!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
Wow, I have no idea what I said to spark this kind of story from you (I like the happy stories, really, I do, why does no one believe me? ), but it is VERY well done! I love the methodical way it all plays out, like a set of dominoes going, one piece after another after another. Clark put all his hopes into the justice system and when it failed him, he just kept losing: his wife, his hope, his friends, his parents, his secret identity, his place in the JL, his conscience, his purpose. It felt like a spiral that just wouldn't let up -- to bring Superman to the point of suicide is unbelievably scary! I was just beginning to get a bit frantic (I KNOW you told me I'd be able to read it without being scarred for life) when Lois finally woke up from the induced dream and I could finally breathe again. HG Wells might be a bit bumbling, but he does always come through for us in the end -- and he's finally learned to talk about things like fertility and pregnancy without blushing and stammering!
Oh, and since I'm a huge fan of the Justice League (the comics, anyway; I've never seen the show -- where is Hal Jordan?!), it was fun to see them. In fact, even though I totally didn't believe in Clark's stance at the moment, I kind of got a kick out of Bruce's reactions. It's always fun to see him thrown off-kilter, and the only bright spot in the midst of Clark's depression was to see how much Batman really does depend on Superman's belief in hope and ideals.
Altogether, though, I think my favorite part is Jimmy. I've always liked him, and since writing Newsworthy, I've had a real soft spot for him, so it was really exciting to get to see him playing the brother/friend supporting Clark in the midst of devastation, and fighting to still call him CK. Just perfect.
Also, may I say how much I love that HG Wells explained how different variables led to different conclusions? Because I was just gearing up to give feedback something like, "Oh, well done, but I just don't believe that Superman would give up everything like this,' and then you completely derailed all my arguments and left me feeling satisfied with a good story and still happy with my belief in an indefatigable Superman! The mark of a good writer!
You asked what you said that inspired this fic. I can actually pinpoint the exact quote. On "Guilty Until Proven Innocent," you said "That was incredibly thought-provoking, and inspires all kinds of dark thoughts about alternate worlds with cynical, world-weary Supermen!" I read that and he idea was sparked. Again, I thank you for it.
I'm glad you liked it and that it didn't scar you for life. It only made sense to set it up in a methodical way - how one thing leads to another. It couldn't happen all at once, or it wouldn't be believable for Clark. It most definitely *is* a spiral that he can't escape or even get a breath from, as I'm sure depression can be.
The girls and I have watched most of the Justice League cartoon episodes on Netflix and I do love it a lot. So I kind of got used to Jon as GL.
I loved, loved, loved having the chance to throw Bruce and Diana into the mix. I had a very strong image in mind before I started writing, of them trying to persuade Clark to come back to the League, particularly Diana. I the stuff with Clemmons and then the post-suicide attempt with Bruce and Diana were my favorites to write, if I'm being honest. And I was very, very drawn to leaving the story with Clark's death - at first. But it felt incomplete and it was more satisfying for me to write the post-dream stuff.
Looks like the urgency of the situation forced away some of Well's usual conversational hang-ups!
I'm glad you liked Jimmy. Again, I had a very strong feeling that Jimmy would be out there trying to contact Clark and pull him back to the world.
Thanks again for reading and inspiring the piece! And I'm glad I could sort of take down your "that would never happen!" instinct!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
Summary: After the execution of Lois Lane-Kent for a crime she didn't commit, things spiral out of control for the Man of Steel.
/eyes scrollbar/ It’s a long one. What’s going to happen?
Quote
The warden didn't move, but Clark could see the subtle rolling of his eyes.
Why’s Clark allowing this to happen? And what’s with H.G. Wells? Shouldn’t he have popped up by now and slapped the doofus over the head?
Quote
His secret be damned, he was going to break her out of that death chamber.
Ah, yes.
Quote
"And don't count on your friend, Superman, coming to bust you out of here," the warden said, his back to Clark, unaware that he was about to eat his words.
Uhhh…
Quote
Clark crashed to the floor as the assault from the Kryptonite hit his body, while inside the death chamber, at a word from the warden, the lethal cocktail of drugs was injected into Lois' veins.
They do know that Superman now knows their faces, right? And where they work? Are they *really* comfortable with a raging superpowered vengeance demon?
Quote
Everyone just assumed that, at some point, Clark would snap out of it and return to his old self, even if Clark himself knew that there would never be any going back to the man he'd once been.
Right. Snap. Uh-huh.
Quote
Jonathan and Martha's home was hit by a tornado while Clark was abroad, dealing with a mudslide
Really? *Helping* on the other side of the globe? *Really*?
Quote
"Yeah," someone else shouted out loud. "Your little girlfriend, Lois Lane, got what she deserved."
Quote
He closed his eyes for a second as he sighed sadly. "But Clark died the moment Lois did, even if I playacted as Clark long enough to prove my wife's innocence.
And the guilty ones? They still have all their limbs?
Quote
"Of course," he said. "For as long as I have strength in my body, I will do what I can to protect the innocent people of this planet."
*REALLY*?
Quote
Karma is an idiot's invented notion.
True. He keeps helping this planet.
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The legal justice system is a joke at best.
And yet, he allows it to exist.
Quote
But even then, D.A. Michael Clemmons had managed to get the lightest sentence possible. And while Clark wasn't a man who sided with death and violence, it seemed more than unfair that Clemmons got to live while Lois didn't.
So, conspiracy to commit murder in federal jurisdiction. Association with a terrorist. Etc. Those charges weren’t enough to have him hanged from the neck until he’s mostly dead and then taken down and his privy parts burned before his inner organs were removed? You know, like they did with Braveheart?
Quote
And then, one night, the unthinkable happened.
A cry for help cut through the wind and rain as Clark patrolled Metropolis.
He going to become the Dark Knight? Or has it already been 18 years?
Quote
"Su...Su...Superman," came the acknowledgement from within.
Clark's blood froze in his veins.
"D.A. Clemmons," he spat out.
Oh, looki there.
Quote
"Help me," the disgraced, former D.A. replied. "Please."
"Give me one good reason why I should," Clark replied coldly, his eyes narrowing.
"I'll die if you don't!" the man pleaded desperately.
He is a tad slow, isn’t he?
Quote
"You're supposed to help people," Michael grunted through gritted teeth. "You've sworn to protect people!"
He did swear? Can’t remember that one.
Quote
"You can't leave me like this!" Michael's voice was growing more strained. His breathing had turned ragged. His time was short now. "You're not the Superman the world once knew."
I think that’s the first smart thing that ever came out of that guy’s mouth.
Quote
Darkness enveloped him. His vision faded, faltered, then died away. His ears heard nothing but the frantic pumping of his blood in his veins. At some point, he passed out, while the radioactive pieces of his home-world slowly killed him.
Huh, I did not expect that.
Quote
Clark's eyes gradually creaked open, then immediately shut again as pain exploded in his head and against the brightness of the sunlight
Someone found him?
Quote
No, this couldn't be hell, he realized. Where were the raging fires and brimstone and pitchfork wielding demons he'd always heard tell of?
"Damn," he swore under his breath in a nearly inaudible voice. His attempt to join Lois on the other side had failed.
He thinks she went straight to the Other Place.
Quote
"It was intentional," Diana supplied as she sauntered into the room and leaned against the doorframe, no trace of a question in her voice. Clark was surprised to see her out of her usual Wonder Woman attire, wearing instead a pair of dark blue jeans and a salmon colored turtleneck sweater.
Damn! Clark swore in his mind. He'd been so successful at avoiding the other superheroes in the world for so long.
Damn busybodies!
Quote
"What Bruce means," Diana interrupted, trying to soothe over Bruce's angry accusation, "is that, when Lantern found you, barely clinging to life at S.T.A.R. Labs, and brought you here, we'd hoped that it had been some kind of accident."
Of course. LANTERN: What? It was a bright green light. What did he expect?
Quote
"Well, killing yourself isn't the answer," Bruce repeated with certainty.
"And what is?" Clark asked, bitterness mingling with utter hopelessness in those words.
Hmm…I think the old Nightwing’s gotten too old to pass as Batman’s protégé…
Quote
If it was known that Superman was hanging around Bruce Wayne's mansion, the rumor mill would spark. People might suspect that the billionaire playboy was more than what he seemed. People might even connect the dots between Bruce and Batman, if they thought about things long and hard enough.
Nah, it would rather go ‘Bruce Wayne Gay?’ and ‘A New Romance for Superman?’
Quote
"Promise me that you won't do...what you did...ever again," Diana pleaded.
Couldn’t he sell pieces of Kryptonite on EBay?
Quote
"The stash of Kryptonite that S.T.A.R. Labs had? I've taken great pains to see that you'll never find so much as one radioactive atom of it, let alone enough for you to commit suicide with."
What if Clark buys a scuba tank and flies out into space before blowing it up when he’s around Jupiter?
Quote
"Maybe you should take some time off. Bruce is willing to put you up here, in the manor. You'd have the run of the place, a roof over your head, food, and, most importantly, company.
Yes, two dark and brooding superheroes under the same roof. Should be fun.
Quote
Or, if you'd prefer, you can stay in one of the rooms at the Hall.
Vacation on the Amazon’s island for the brooding widower with the nice physique?
Quote
But now he felt the cold seeping into deepest parts of his body.
Hey look! The environment protection measures start to take affect – the ozone layer’s been restored over the arctic.
Quote
Three months later, at the age of eighty-seven, Clark Kent, once known as Superman, quietly passed away in his sleep.
Oh boy. He was sitting in that ice cave for 30+ years, wasn’t he?
Quote
Lois woke up, tears streaming down her cheeks, wetting the pillow beneath her head. She blindly reached over to her husband's side of the bed, only to find it empty.
Quote
She took her snack into the living room and settled on the couch. But before she could do so much as reach for the television remote, the doorbell rang. She glanced at the clock. Twenty after twelve.
Huh.
Quote
"H.G. Wells!" Lois said in surprise. "What are you doing here? Please, don't tell me there's another curse or something that we have to play Back to the Future to stop."
What’s going on?
Quote
He nodded slightly. "I wanted to talk to you about the dream you just had. The one so terrible it froze the marrow in your bones and exiled you from your bed to seek comfort in a midnight snack," he said, nodding toward the remnants of her tea and brownie.
"How did you...?"
"I'm the one who gave you that dream."
Oh boy. He’s living a dangerous life, isn’t he?
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"That's because it wasn't a dream. All of what you saw will come to pass. Unless, of course, you listen carefully to what I have to tell you," Herb warned her.
Lois leaned forward in her seat just an inch or two. "I'm listening."
"Good. Now then, in two days' time, one of your old sources, a man by the name of Sykes, is going to contact you and ask to meet with you privately.
Lookithere, someone’s never heard of such a thing as ‘overkill’.
Quote
Clark stood and with a gentle, practiced motion, scooped up Lois in his arms. "You're right," he said, gazing down on her with a loving smile. "There's nothing we can't handle together."
Awwwww.
What a dark tale With a happy ending!
Michael
Join us on the #loisclark Discord server! We talk about fanfic, our favorite show, life, and more! (It’s almost like the IRC days of old again!)
/eyes scrollbar/ It’s a long one. What’s going to happen?
Nothing good.
Quote
They do know that Superman now knows their faces, right? And where they work? Are they *really* comfortable with a raging superpowered vengeance demon?
They're just doing their jobs. Everyone else, however, is fair game.
Quote
And the guilty ones? They still have all their limbs?
Quote
True. He keeps helping this planet
<nods>
Quote
So, conspiracy to commit murder in federal jurisdiction. Association with a terrorist. Etc. Those charges weren’t enough to have him hanged from the neck until he’s mostly dead and then taken down and his privy parts burned before his inner organs were removed? You know, like they did with Braveheart?
), but it is VERY well done! I love the methodical way it all plays out, like a set of dominoes going, one piece after another after another. Clark put all his hopes into the justice system and when it failed him, he just kept losing: his wife, his hope, his friends, his parents, his secret identity, his place in the JL, his conscience, his purpose. It felt like a spiral that just wouldn't let up -- to bring Superman to the point of suicide is unbelievably scary! I was just beginning to get a bit frantic (I KNOW you told me I'd be able to read it without being scarred for life) when Lois finally woke up from the induced dream and I could finally breathe again. HG Wells might be a bit bumbling, but he does always come through for us in the end -- and he's finally learned to talk about things like fertility and pregnancy without blushing and stammering! 
/eyes scrollbar/ It’s a long one. What’s going to happen?![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/konfus/a015.gif)
He going to become the Dark Knight? Or has it already been 18 years?
Someone found him?
He thinks she went straight to the Other Place.
With a happy ending!
Michael
![[Linked Image]](https://cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/a045.gif)