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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082 |
Thanks to everyone who played along with the Kerth quizzes this year.  Here's a little story for Lady Loisette, who earned the most points. Enjoy! 
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie. 
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,393 Likes: 1
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,393 Likes: 1 |
Wow, what a powerful story. I can't exactly say I enjoyed it, given the subject matter (as a divorcée myself, I found the story hitting a little too close to home at times), but I can honestly say that it moved me and that I am glad I read it.
Well done!
Joy,
Lynn
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082 |
LOL...okay, you're right, Lynn, "enjoy" may be the wrong word! How about, "I hope you appreciate it for what it is." I'm touched that it moved you - thank you for that lovely feedback! *And I'll post your story next.
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie.
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,393 Likes: 1
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,393 Likes: 1 |
And I'll post your story next.  Yay! I really did enjoy the draft of that story, and I'm eager to see the final version. I anticipate your getting a lot of positive feedback on it; everyone here is in for a treat with that one. Thanks again for writing it. Joy, Lynn
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 2
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 2 |
Wow, powerfully written. Sad in the subject matter, but ultimately uplifting in a way as Elise recognizes how and where things went wrong, and that she isn't totally to blame - that she has to stop making excuses for Calvin. Well done!
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,658 Likes: 10
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,658 Likes: 10 |
Not a pretty subject matter, but well done.
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
/Hug for groobie/ What a dark place to go to. Well done. I'm glad she's reached a spot where she can see what her actually life is. That schmuck was a user and she'll be better off without him. In a roundabout way, Superman and Lois have rescued another woman from an abusive relationship. It was worth it just to save her.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 332 Likes: 1
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 332 Likes: 1 |
Good for Elise. Calvin was so horrible and she deserved so much better than him.
"Who's asking? Clark... or Superman?"
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,466
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,466 |
I say the words out loud, brushing off his attempt to keep me silent: “You don’t speak for me anymore, Calvin. I want a divorce...not that anyone ever knew we were married.” I've always loved "Whine, Whine, Whine" (for the overall 'feel' of the episode...the angst between Lois and Clark, and then--obviously  --for the beautiful resolution at the end). BUT, another definite allure to the episode, IMO, are the guest stars. It's quite enjoyable (for some odd reason  ) to be annoyed with Calvin. And, definitely, the icing on the cake for me has always been this great moment: Elise standing up to Calvin. Even though we don't really know Elise all that well from the episode, I'm always so proud of her here  . I think that's a big reason why I really liked this piece so much, Susan. I really wanted to get to know Elise more. She had a story to be told. And yes, this story was sad--in what Elise has been through...but also, it's inspiring--in where she is going. No, what I’m really afraid of is independence. Of being alone – struggling to make my way in the world without his support. Because, if I look around, I’d see that he’s all I have. I’m afraid he’ll leave me, and I’ll be forced to confront what I never wanted to see.
How he cut me off from my friends. How he distanced us from our families. How he shoehorned us into my tiny apartment, pretending to be a family while hiding our marital status.
It made no sense. It still doesn’t. Well, now it doesn’t have to.
Because I’m leaving him. And I will not be swayed by his charm, by our shared history, by the love I know he still feels for me. You brought so much reality to the piece, also. I was impressed by how easily you seemed to be able to get inside Elise's world. To show us how aware really of everything she has been. To show us how lonely she was. And also, to show us how strong she is to be able to get 'out'. You know how much I like the WAFFY moments, everything between Lois and Clark. And that so much has to do with seeing and feeling their connection to each other. This piece...you connect Elise to us. So different...but also, so very powerful. Wonderful written--great job! Impressed (as always ), Laura
Last edited by LMA; 02/25/15 08:14 PM.
"Where's Clark?" "Right here."
...two simple sentences--with so much meaning.
~Lois and Clark in 'House of Luthor'~
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082 |
Thank you all so much for the positive feedback.  When I saw the story request for a fair, I immediately thought of WWW, and from there, I was drawn to Elise's story, because I like flushing out minor characters from the show. It's not traditionally WAFFY in its subject matter, but there is something empowering about seeing a woman recognize the truth of her situation and choosing to stand up for what's right. So thanks to all of the readers out there for coming with me on her journey.
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie.
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Loved this look into a character we only see a few times! It was really beautifully written, and so many of the turns of phrases were so true and so on point that I had to read them over again to savor them. I'm really impressed by how you were able to show her world and her past and their story, the good times and the bad times, in so few words. I really felt for her in just the first few paragraphs. As a somewhat insecure person myself, I can identify with her easily, and I love the conclusion of coming to see herself as an independent clause. Beautiful imagery throughout as well, the springtime, and the core being rotten and the fact that they were on top of a bubble -- so many great sentences!
Lovely story!
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082 |
Thanks, Anti-K! You know how much I love your writing style, so I'll take compliments from you all day!  I'm really pleased that this little story resonated with people on so many different levels.
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 8,944 Likes: 28 |
Hi Susan! I want a divorce.
The realization hits me like the amp that nearly hit him, killing the remaining spark of hope I had for us. Come to think of it, this time, even Superman flying in and carrying her away at the last moment probably wouldn’t help. I hear the dismissive tone in his voice when he insults my intelligence and disregards my opinion. I actually just happened to rewatch a couple of Ferengi-themed episodes of DS9 so that makes for an…interesting parallel. God, I’m still justifying for him. I need to stop that. ![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/d025.gif) I say the words out loud, brushing off his attempt to keep me silent: “You don’t speak for me anymore, Calvin. I want a divorce...not that anyone ever knew we were married.” Well done! Sad but beautifully written  Michael
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