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KenJ Offline OP
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Comments go here.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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You certainly did add greater description and more color!

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Then came the fateful day that Sam ran afoul of the medical establishment. He had a string of patients, all exhibiting similar symptomatology. Eventually they were all diagnosed with a variant of Lyme disease. The accepted treatment was a course of high dose, I.V. antibiotics, however in searching the literature he found that this was only successful if the disease were caught within the first few weeks of infection. That being the case he tried a therapy that was outside of the allopathic medical playbook. The therapy he tried was actually very simple, ozone dissolved in normal saline solution administered by I.V. and a high potency vitamin regimen to boost the body's immune system. When the treatment worked he began to write papers documenting his results. The medical community claimed that his results were anecdotal and since he had not performed any double blind studies his results were called into question. The problem came in with the fact that Big Pharma insisted that there were antibiotics out there for the condition and his was a non-pharmaceutical based treatment. Big Pharma carries a lot of weight and through their willing accomplices within the medical community pressure was applied to Doctor Sam Lane.


Unless Big Pharma can get their piece of the pie, they will crush any competition.

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Like most Canadian children, Lois was involved in winter sports growing up. She enjoyed cross country and Alpine skiing, ice skating, both figure and speed, and snowshoeing. She was also an avid hockey fan and being from Montreal naturally her favorite team was the Canadians. During the long cold winters, Lois took every opportunity to ski. There was ample opportunity for Alpine skiing and she did that most weekends, but she really loved cross-country and since they lived in the suburbs she would strap on her skis, throw her schoolbooks into a backpack and ski to school on a daily basis rather than take the bus. She even tried out for the Canadian Olympic Cross Country Ski Team. She was one of the youngest competitors and was really crushed when she failed to qualify. She was seventh in a field of over forty-five where only the top five qualified after seven heats. She also tried out for the biathlon, but although she could handle the cross-country portion, her marksmanship was inadequate to the task. In school, Lois was an outstanding student and was a class leader all through school. A lot of this was an attempt on Lois's part to win approbation from her more and more absentee father.

Lois has always been competitive, but this gives us a better understanding of her personality and relentless determination. Sam was a blind fool, most men would be extremely pleased to have such a daughter.

Nicely done

I especially like the way H.G. and the Kents are included in this A.U.


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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One of the things I love about the writen story over the filmed story ais the ability of the author to to truly flesh out the story in detail. Sometimes the challenge is to know just how far to go in that direction.

In this chapter you provided a great balance of important background information that is rarely ever covered in filmed versions (too boring and not enough action) and stuff happening. I really loved Lois trying out for the Canadian team in cross country skiing and then giving the biathlon a go. I agree that Sam Lane is a fool in most of the universes for not understanding what a talented, wonderful daughter he had. Having Herb as the story teller is a great technique.

Well done my friend!

Mike

Last edited by Mike M; 08/29/15 08:38 AM.

Create all the happiness you are able to create.
Remove all the misery you are able to remove.

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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Morgana,

Thanks for the FDK!

I always appreciate your comments. That is especially hard with this one since you were a beta reader. I figured that the only way to keep it interesting for you was to add more detail after the beta read.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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Hi Mike,

Thanks for the FDK!

Originally Posted by Mike M
One of the things I love about the writen story over the filmed story ais the ability of the author to to truly flesh out the story in detail. Sometimes the challenge is to know just how far to go in that direction.

In this chapter you provided a great balance of important background information that is rarely ever covered in filmed versions (too boring and not enough action) and stuff happening. I really loved Lois trying out for the Canadian team in cross country skiing and then giving the biathlon a go. I agree that Sam Lane is a fool in most of the universes for not understanding what a talented, wonderful daughter he had. Having Herb as the story teller is a great technique.

Well done my friend!

Mike

Thank you for the compliment!

This particular story requires a lot of background so it is a necessary evil. I am pleased that it appears that I have managed to balance that with action.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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I'm also intrigued by this story. And in awe of the detailed background information you provide. clap hail

Looking forward to the next chapters.


Cuidadora

"Honey, we didn't care if you were a Russian or a Martian... You were ours... and we weren't giving you to anybody." ~ Martha in Strange Visitor

"A love that risks nothing is worth nothing." ~ Jonathan in Big Girls Don't Fly

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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Cuiadora,

Thanks for the FDK!

Originally Posted by cuidadora
I'm also intrigued by this story. And in awe of the detailed background information you provide. clap hail

Looking forward to the next chapters.

I'm happy that this story has caught your attention.

As you will see in the following chapters, the background information is needed to really set the scene for when we get to the main part of the story. We are still building up to it.

I shall not disappoint my readers. I made a promise when I first started writing that I would not even start to post a story until it was complete. Barring holidays I will maintain my Tuesday/Friday schedule. In case of a Friday holiday, I will post a day early.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj
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I'm very much liking how all the world's are interwoven. Definitely have to go back and re-reread all the stories again.

Tempus.....him again....so glad our duo (trio, including herb) are able to defeat him.


Black Star: "If it's fear that you speak of, then I'll stand and face it. I'll never give up. The only time I lose is when I die!" - Soul Eater
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KenJ Offline OP
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Hi Terry,

Thanks for the FDK!

As you get farther into the story you will see just how involved Herb will be.


Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks"

My stories can be found here

kj

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