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#262053 03/25/15 07:13 AM
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This is the first story I've posted in a long time, so be nice lol.


"It means never having to play it cool about how much you like something. It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult. Being a geek is extremely liberating."- Simon Pegg
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What a nice little vignette. When Lois asked Clark to get Superman for her, I immediately thought of this other scene right at the end of season one. I wondered how Clark was going to react. Poor guy, he must have been afraid that his real persona would once again be turned down in favor of the superhero. It was good to read that Lois had something else in mind. Perhaps it would be rather interesting to read this story written from Clark's POV. Perhaps this could be a sequel?

I liked that Superman told her the whole truth, just this once, knowing full well that he would Lois clue in on another truth.

Last but not least, you asked for a title. My suggestion would be: "The truth behind the omission".


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Welcome back!

Really enjoyed the story. Lois would dissect Lex's entire conversation, word by word, just like this.

It never made sense to me that Superman would keep the cage a secret from Lois. Right after the aborted wedding wouldn't have been appropriate, but when Lex returns in the Phoenix would be a perfect time to tell her. I like the revelation, too.

How about "House of the Phoenix"?


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Well done. I have a feeling that even if Clark hadn't given the "I can't" hint, he had slipped so often during their discussion that Lois would have pieced things together even without that final hint; it just would have taken her a little longer.

There is an English folk song called, "Sorry the Day I was Married." How about modifying it to make a story title of: "Sorry the Day I was (Almost) Married"?

Joy,
Lynn

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Originally Posted by Shallowford
How about "House of the Phoenix"?


I vote for that! thumbsup

Welcome back grin


Go I Know Not Whither and Fetch I Know Not What
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I liked the timing of this question to Superman, too. It makes sense that Lois would have all the wedding unpleasantness brought back up when the reappearance of Lex.

Quote
"Yeah. Clark, can you please contact Superman for me? And get him to meet me at my apartment?
There's something I need to ask him." She caught the sudden tension in Clark's frame at her
request and hastened to reassure him as he nodded his assent.
Yes, I bet that caused Clark undue panic. Poor fellow.

Quote
"And Clark, about the date thing?
I'm sorry about before. I just wanted to stop Perry and Jimmy from getting suspicious and-" He put
up a hand to stop her, a much more genuine grin on his face now.
I'm not sure how these words were reassuring to Clark that Lois wasn't dumping him for Superman (again). I'm also lost about what she's talking about. What were Perry and Jimmy becoming suspicious about? Her and Clark? Her and Lex? Something else? Very vague.

Quote
“Something that Lex said... He said that this was the second chance he'd had to kill you. Was it?”
Did Lex actually say that in canon? If he did, I totally missed it! Good catch!

Quote
“I
should've known it was a trap. My parents tell me I'm too trusting sometimes. But I went.”
Ooops. Clark your mask slipped a bit there. He had told Lois previously that his Mom made his uniform, so she knows he wasn't formed from a spec of dust... but still big revelation.

Quote
“Yes. I talked to Henderson about it after everything had settled down. No one found any
Kryptonite- or at least no one reported finding it. I think what Luthor had is the piece that was sent
to the lab by Wayne Irig, the piece that went missing.” He paused. “Kryptonite exposure is...
agonising. It drains my powers, and I can't touch it because it burns. Even if it didn't drain my
powers, I still wouldn't have been able to break through the bars... It burned too much...” His voice
trailed off as he remembered what it was like, being trapped in Luthor's cage for hours, the
intense, whole body aching, the burning of his lungs every time he breathed, the knowledge that
he was going to die.
Very well described. Beautiful even, if a description of such ugliness and pain can be beautiful.

Quote
Clark looked back up at Lois, suddenly aware of how far he'd let the mask slip. He hadn't sounded
much like Superman in the last few minutes. Maybe it was time...
Oh, dear. Superman just showed Lois a glimpse of his artistic tie.

Quote
“You were outside? I didn't see you... But why-”
Open mouth, Lois, insert your tasteful heeled shoe.

Quote
“Why didn't I save him?” He cut her off, a little angered.
I agree that Clark has every right to feel angry. That was insensitive of Lois to ask that, especially after what he had just told her about being tortured and losing his powers.

Quote
A wild impulse seized him. Smiling a little, he made eye contact with her. He wasn't sure if she
remembered every detail of that day, but he suspected that she did- and that she'd tortured
herself with them in the aftermath.

Still holding eye contact, he said "I tried to take off, but all I could manage was a sort of jump.
When I realised I couldn't save him, I said 'I can't'. He hit the ground a moment or two later."
Oooooh! He went for it. The whole, wildly-obvious hint.

I like "House of Phoenix" for a title as well. I had some other not so good ideas, but they left my head upon reading that one. If they return to me, I'll let you know.

You did a good job on reprising that scene in BatP on the bench. It fit perfectly into the return of Lex and rehashing of old demons plot. Actually this whole story mirrors that traumatic time for Clark. Will Lois break his heart again? Did Lex's return remind Lois how much she loved Superman more than Clark? It was a great way to draw us into how Clark is feeling at that exact moment. Well done. clap


VirginiaR.
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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I will be more than nice...Bravo!

Now all this cute little fic needs is a title, sorry I will have to think about this. sad

Oh, by the way, welcome back to the boards.

Last edited by Morgana; 03/25/15 07:52 PM. Reason: Additional comments

Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Thanks for the 'welcome back', everyone! See, this is one of the reasons I like this fandom... everyone is so nice smile

Originally Posted by bakasi
When Lois asked Clark to get Superman for her, I immediately thought of this other scene right at the end of season one. I wondered how Clark was going to react. Poor guy, he must have been afraid that his real persona would once again be turned down in favor of the superhero.

This made me laugh so hard, bakasi. Right up until the final version, the paragraph you're talking about read
"Clark asked the question with some trepidation. Lois didn't send for him often, and he never knew what he'd find when she did. He hoped that this wasn't to be a renewal of Lois's more romantic feelings for his Super persona, not when he'd finally managed to ask her out as Clark."
So I guess great minds think alike there. I omitted the second line in the final version because I just couldn't get it to flow right.

I probably should have explained that this story is intended to pick up right at the end of 'The Phoenix', but if it's not immediately obvious from the beginning of the story, I think I should rewrite some of the opening scene. (I knew I should've had this beta read).

Oh, and I really like the suggestion of House of the Phoenix as a title! Thanks smile

Feli




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Great little scene between Lois and Clark. I've often wondered how and when Clark came clean about Lex trying to kill him. (I doubt he would have kept her in the dark about things once the secret of CK=S came out.) But it's such an excruciating time for the both of them to think back on - Lois' mental anguish remembered and Clark's physical AND mental anguished brought back to mind.

Nicely handled.

Story title suggestion - An Edited Truth


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How about 'Life Was Good' the way you ended the story.

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Try this one on: A Long Overdue Conversation


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Originally Posted by Meadowrose
How about 'Life Was Good' the way you ended the story.
Perhaps changing this to the present tense "Life Is Good" would work better. Back then (past tense, i.e. during HoL) life wasn't as good as it is now. Now, Life Is Good. wink


VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Hi NostagiaKick wave. Great to see you back!

I really enjoyed the story, too. BATP and HOL are two of my favorite (and most-watched episodes blush ). It was nice to have some of those moments rehashed, have things get out in the open. And it made total sense that they'd talk, being that they had just had this encounter with Lex in The Phoenix. Lois needed to know what Clark had been through as Superman in that cage. And while it was pretty unsensitve for Lois to ask Clark/Superman why he didn't save Lex--especially right after learning what Lex had done to him, no less--I'm sure she had previously had that thought and needed to ask.


I loved Clark's hint! That hug when they are reunited after Lois comes out of the pent house, and then again when Clark comforts her during Lex's jump, has got to be burned in her memory. It was a very indirect (but also so direct) way to tell her.

Did you decide on a title then? "House of the Phoenix" caught my attention, but there were a lot of quality ideas her notworthy.

Thanks for the story this morning smile
Laura


Last edited by LMA; 04/04/15 11:05 AM.

"Where's Clark?" "Right here."

...two simple sentences--with so much meaning.

~Lois and Clark in 'House of Luthor'~

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