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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3 |
Amidst the screeching of tires and skidding across the lane, we continue our hard left turn away from canon and roar dangerously close to tragedy. Please do not chew off more than two fingers in this section.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,332
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,332 |
Well done Terry! This version makes a lot more sense than the canon version ever did. I never got into that freezing her with his breath thing and then successfully bringing her back with no damage. Your stories "She's" and "Cold Shoulder" covered the idea of that virtual impossibility. You were right that things got bumpy but it played out pretty realistically. And you had to give us a cliffhanger as it would not be one of your stories without at least one. I actually was expecting you to kill/injure Jonathan and Martha since you had already done the other possibilities in the above mentioned stories. A different twist never the less.
Oh, and obviously I am still here...
Waiting for the next chapter!!!
Mike
Last edited by Mike M; 12/13/14 03:20 PM.
Create all the happiness you are able to create.
Remove all the misery you are able to remove.
Jeremy Bentham
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,082 |
Certainly a better solution than freezing her to death! Really, what were the writers thinking on that one?  And, though she doesn't realize she's admitted it to Clark yet, I certainly appreciate I’m terrified that we’ll get involved and that he’ll hurt me even if he doesn’t want to and I care about him too much to lose him to a breakup so I’ve been pushing him away for months and I – I wish now that I hadn’t.” I hold out hope for the two of them and am happy to learn that Clark's not leaving Metropolis now. 
You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie. 
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Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
So much fun details to ponder in this part. So many what ifs. Thank you for not killing off anyone who deserved to live. I'm glad Nigel still fell for Jace's plan for him despite otherwise eluding justice. I was worried about Jace's diary getting in the wrong hands and the Kents when Superman flew Lois to the hospital, knowing that St. John was still there.
Clark knows the truth now and knows he can't leave, because Lois truly does love him. Will she act on that love though? Will he? Will Lois let him? What will Clark learn, if anything, from Tempus's diary? Will knowing that Lois and Superman / Clark's descendants are supposed to form Utopia be enough to sustain Clark through Lois's indecision, or will enough differences between Tempus's diary and this new reality be enough to give him doubts?
Although Lois now has been hurt in the process of helping Clark's parents. Will that cause Clark to want to put distance between Lois and himself? Lois and Superman? By doing so though, he'll be concreting Lois's fears that Clark will someday break her heart by making it happen sooner.
Freezing Lois was a character decision I never agreed with. Thank you for coming up with yet another alternative. There were so many other ways to save the Kents, especially for a man who has so many powers, than to freeze Lois. Perhaps because the threat was so personal, Clark could not think straight... but that does not excuse his actions.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,661 Likes: 10
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,661 Likes: 10 |
Finally! As he came into their sight, Jace actually giggled. “You did it. You really did it! Nigel didn’t think you would but you did! Wow! What did you do to her? How’d you whack her?” For the record; never liked Jace. What a creep.  Lois groaned and tried to straighten out. Superman strode to her side and bent down to help her up, but she cried out as he put his hand on her elbow. “No! Don’t pull – I’m hit.”
She lifted her hand away from her abdomen. It was covered with blood. Shot in the abdomen? That is not good. This is a very hard turn from canon. Something which has become a Leatherwood trademark. Henderson had come to the waiting room and given the lead box to Clark, saying that it wasn’t evidence and looked like someone’s private property. He’d also avoided making eye contact with Clark as he did so. Instead of brooding over just how much Bill Henderson knew or suspected, Clark had taken the box out of the atmosphere and thrown it into a decaying cometary orbit. In a few days it would vaporize in the sun’s outer atmosphere with no sign that it had ever existed. Although it is hard to imagine Nigel taking a swig while he's trying to get away, since this is an AU I can roll with that. Henderson on the other hand is perfectly within canon, unless it is necessary he will never reveal to anyone who Superman really is. The man maybe laconic, but he knows how to keep a secret. The prayer was beautiful. Amen. Next?
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 391
Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 391 |
Wow, that was definitely a hard turn! I hope Lois doesn’t suffer any permanent ill effects, but I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. Looking forward to the next part!
This is going to be a very sobering experience for both of them. Maybe they will be more open with each other now.
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,145 Likes: 3 |
Hey, FoLCs, thanks for the shout-outs for the "better idea." Hated the freezing thing - they never dealt directly with the possibility of severe cell damage or the possibility of residual neurological effects. Of course, it was a comic book/romance fantasy come to life, so maybe we shouldn't be too hard on the writers.
Mike, I deal with Jonathan and Martha passing away in an unpublished (as yet) story I'm still working with. Maybe later in this tale, since it does span a number of years, will we hear about something like this.
Groobie, Clark just said he wasn't leaving Metropolis "now." He didn't say he'd never leave. Wait, spoilers!
Morgana, isn't it possible that Nigel felt like he needed something to "calm" him down after being Tasered? I understand that it's quite a shocking experience.
Virginia, you're drawing conclusions from incomplete data. The next chapter will give you more material to work with.
DebbieG, we'll see how open they are (or aren't) in the next two chapters. In fact, the next one is up right - about - now!
See you in the feedback.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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