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ShayneT Offline OP
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Well, what do you think?

Last edited by ShayneT; 08/29/14 09:37 PM.
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Beat Reporter
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I noticed that the theatre manager took the thug’s word that he was Lois’s husband without question and without asking her. grumble Another sign of the era Lois finds herself in.

I like that Lois rescued herself, without Clark’s help. Clark may get his chance, though, as I suspect we haven’t seen the last of the thug.

Did Lois lose her purse with the iPhone?

I’m still waiting eagerly for more!

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I think the thug's reappearance and kidnapping of Lois will have more impact on Clark's decision than any other factor he could have come up with during the night. I'm so glad that he didn't leave town with the acting troupe.

I'm so glad that Robinson didn't hear the full of Lois and Clark's conversation. I wonder though, if Clark had heard it or if Robinson told Clark that Lois went off with some man claiming to be her husband, all the while knowing that.../went back and checked Part 13/.... no, Lois never told Clark that one of the thugs may have followed her into the past. Oh, dear. What could he have thought? Clearly, he knew from her iPhone that she was from the future, but what must he have thought when the travel plans for the troupe were changed to the night before? Or did he merely tell Robinson that he wasn't going? Lois had said that he would be there to stop a fire and save people, that in itself would be enough of a catalyst to stop Clark from leaving. He must have been in torment from her disappearance, thinking either she found another portal or something had happened to her and he hadn't been able to stop it.

Originally Posted by DebbieG
I like that Lois rescued herself, without Clark’s help. Clark may get his chance, though, as I suspect we haven’t seen the last of the thug.

Did Lois lose her purse with the iPhone?

I’m still waiting eagerly for more!
I agree with all of these statements, Debbie. smile Yes, eek what happened to Lois's cell phone? I didn't think about that. shock Yes, I'm sure the thug will return. The tension is building.


VirginiaR.
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"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Top Banana
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Fantastic part. I know you said that this would not end the same way as the movie, or even be particularly similar story, but I love that you got in a parallel to CR's beating.

When Lois found out that the troupe had left I immediately thought of the scene where they run to each other down/up the steps and hoped you'd do it. I see it coming after that last paragraph. laugh

Love that you led us all down the path of 'the thug will turn up in a few days' and it was actually the opposite.

More soon please.


KatherineKent/Victoria
Lois: "You put up with me for the same reason I put up with you. It's because I'm completely in love with you."
Clark: "And I love you ... Did we just make up?"
Lois: "I think so."
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Clark looked at Lois with joy. So very lovely.


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Pulitzer
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Oh my the tension is building! What's going to happen next?

That thug was a dope! Imagine how he could have improved life for so many people rather than complaining about not having deodorant!

Anybody ever see the move Final Countdown with Kirk Douglas? Extremely interesting.


Morgana

A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Kerth
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Originally Posted by ShayneT
He looked up at her, and his face brightened into a look of joy.

What a wonderful, cruel, brilliant, evil place to end this part! wildguy

I'm laughing at the idea that the thug is so ineffectual that he's flummoxed by a lack of deodorant in the past. If he had half a brain, he could have done something with his knowledge of the future to make his life more comfortable! It'd be even more funny for him to go back to present day and find he was so useless that he hadn't had a single effect on the timeline. grin





You can find my stories as Groobie on the nfic archives and Susan Young on the gfic archives. In other words, you know me as Groobie. wink
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Pulitzer
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I knew the thug would return! It's like Chekhov's gun. You have a thug in chapter two, you have to use him by chapter fourteen. It's required by the laws of fic-writing. smile

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I had a feeling, that the guy in the hotel had been the thug, but I was sure he was young. That's some twist, Shayne. smile Clark had to stay to make sure Lois was safe, but I loved the last scene anyway.

It's time for part 15, isn't it? wink


KateB

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