Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Fanfic Challenge 100 Ways to Reveal the Secret

Back by popular demand! After the surprising success of my challenge 100 Ways to Kill Superman, I've decided to put a new challenge up here on the boards in the same vein.

100 Ways to Reveal the "Secret"

Similar rules as before. List of a hundred different ways that Clark/Superman's secret identity could be revealed. It can be revealed to anyone, by anyone, and in any manner you choose. Just be creative, have fun, and let's destroy some alter-egos!

1. In TOGOM, Clark has a rather delayed reaction to his shooting. He stands there in confusion for a few moments, and when he suddenly realizes everyone's staring at him in shock, he drops down to the floor and pretends to be dead. No one buys it.

2. Clark Kent is at the DMV's office, getting a new driver's license. After taking a bad picture, however, the clerk tells him that he will need to remove his glasses so as to reduce the glare- and he might want to run a comb through his hair, too. He obliges. Superman is exposed.

Next 98 are for you fine folcs! Have at it!

Fun list!

3) Lois finally notices the freckle/mole/whatever-that-dark-spot-above-Dean's-lip-is on both Clark and Superman.

4) Clark Kent gets called in for the draft, has to take an eye exam, and in his nervousness sees through the wall and reads the chart in the room next door.

5) While Clark is yet perfecting his spin-change, he accidentally wears his tie as Superman. Lois recognized the hideous strip of cloth.

Joy,
Lynn

Just what the blue suit needs, a tie!

6) Lois sees a LNN report about the plane Clark took home for the weekend almost crashing due to a tornado; thank goodness Superman was in the vacinity. When she contacts the airline to check on Clark's condition, she's told he wasn't a passenger. Yet, when she calls the Kents, Clark answers the phone, claiming to have been on the scene.

7) Tempus. Duh!

8. In HiM, Lois can't sleep in the middle of the night. Bored, she wanders to the living room to see if Clark is awake. She finds him sound asleep...three feet above the couch.

9. Lois and Clark go to city hall to get their marriage license. Unfortunately, that day, a new law goes into effect that all couples looking to get married must get a blood test to prove there is no relation. Before Clark can protest, he is whisked away to have his blood drawn. As the needle attempts to puncture his skin it snaps, giving the nurse the biggest surprise of her life!

10. Lord Nor decides to broadcast the trial of Kal-El over all of Earth, just to prove a point. As the trial unfolds, Lois becomes evidence. And since everyone in the world seems to know that Lois Lane and Clark Kent are to be wed, everyone makes the connection.

11. Lois finally gets her heart's wish to kiss Superman at the end of PML. As she kisses him, however, she realizes that his kiss is exactly the same as Clark's.

12. The lightning bolt in "Bolt from the Blue" nearly strikes Lois, Clark (in work threads, not suit) noticing this immediately jumps to try and push her out of the way. The powers are given to her just like they were "given" to Resplendent Man. (I do see the possibility that Clark would try to explain it away as a side effect of the lightning.)

13. In HoL, when Perry returns to help find homeless Jimmy, Clark answers the door without remembering to put on his glasses.

14. In GGGoH, Lois accidentally (or, knowing Lois' tendencies to snoop, perhaps accidentally-on-purpose) stumbles upon Martha's sewing room and sees a half completed Suit.

15. Clark was unknowingly exposed to red K. He and Lois are having lunch together. They've both ordered soup. When he sees Lois blowing over her bowl to cool her soup down, Clark blows on his to fit in. Only the liquid in his bowl turns into a soup-cicle.

Joy,
Lynn

Oh my goodness, Lynn that's really got my mind running!!

Originally posted by Christina:
By all means run with it, then.

Joy,
Lynn

16. In ASU, Lois actually sees the Kents push Clark off the roof of his building. Not only would they prove to Clark he's Superman but to Lois as well.

17: "Hmmm," said The Doctor, waving his sonic screwdriver, "ultra-dense tissue capable of absorbing solar radiation. Only one alien species has that capability and... oh, sorry, was it supposed to be a secret?"

18. Clark has some sleep disturbances and starts sleep-flying around Metropolis in his pajamas.

19. Clark gives one of his improvised-on-the-spot poor excuses and flees the newsroom tugging at his tie (still at normal speed not to draw too much unwanted attention, but completely focused on the call for help he's hearing). Tired of her partner's disappearing act, Lois decides to follow him and stumbles upon:
a) Clark superspeeding up the stairs to the roof
b) Clark flying out one of the windows
c) Clark spinning into the suit in the supply room or wherever

You pick your favorite scenario...

20. A power surge during the "years transfer" from Superman to Old Jimmy (Brutal Youth) leaves the photographer with some of Clark's powers...seemingly permenantly. Clark takes Jimmy under his wing to teach him about how to handle this. Lesson One: Preserving your secret identity.

21. Prolonged exposure to Red K in Individual Responsibility leaves Clark apathetic enough to spin change in front of Lois.

22. Martha's laser Superman dies during Clark's press conference in Top Copy. With mounting pressure, he's forced to admit the truth.

Oops... I can imagine the look on Martha's face

22a. Martha builds her laser with what she thinks is a ruby she found near her home. When the laser dies, the red kryptonite gives everyone in the crowd Clark's powers.

#23 - SuperClone keeps a watch on the real Superman and sees him spin change into Clark Kent. SuperClone then tells Lex.

#24. SuperClone keeps a watch on the real Superman and sees him spin change into Clark Kent. Emulating his genetic "father," SuperClone decides to give it a try...and does it in full view of a television news crew shooting live footage.

Poor Clark!

#25: On the White Orchid Ball, people notice Clark floating.
#26: Lex tries to run the sword of Alexander the Great through Clark's neck...
#27: During one of his first spin changes, Clark forgets to remove his glasses when turning into Superman.
#27a: He has part of the cape sticking out of his work suit as Clark.
#28: One day at work, Clark suffers from hiccup. The Daily Planet building shakes with every hiccup...

#29: When Lois slams the door in Clark's face at the end of "Lucky Leon" Clark pushes his way through the door. (based on blooper #5 on redboots... take a peek at second 0:53 to see what I mean.)

What's "redboots"? Do you have a link?

Redboots

I have trouble with the bloopers though. They don't open for me. Maybe with this new laptop though?

Thanks for the link, DC, but I didn't see a "bloopers" page. No wonder it didn't open for you.

Huh. Couldn't find it on the main page, but I googled it.

Redboots Multimedia

Aaaand, I still can't open the bloopers.

You can Youtube *most* of the bloopers too.

#30 - The photos of Superman and Lois making nookie are never exposed to daylight thanks to competent villains (the camera never fell and the back never popped open). Finding no way out of the situation, Clark is forced to admit that he's Superman, in order to protect Lois and himself, and their images.

Never exposed?

She means when the camera never fell, the film was never exposed to the sun, and thus the evidence was never destroyed.

Deadly Chakram, I found the youtube clip of the same scene here .

Exactly. Let me go and fix my post.

Oh, see, when you wrote "never exposed to daylight" I thought you meant, "never saw the light of day", hense my confusion at how this was a revealation.

Ah! Sorry about that.

Great start, everybody! I'll give you one, but I'm going to quickly hide it away before I give away any ideas for something I'm working on.

31. When Lex Luthor buys the Daily Planet, he installs many new features to help maintenance run more smoothly. One of which is a camera system. Suddenly, Clark's entrances and exits are infinitely less-subtle, and Lex Luthor gains a pretty big secret.

32. Clark is so enraptured by Lois's kiss in Trask's plane, he accidently manueuvers both of them out the open door with Lois still in his arms.

#33. The Superman universe internet somehow picks up our world's internet. Lois does a search for "Superman" and finds out that - surprise! - EVERYONE knows Clark Kent IS Superman!

"Tempus, you fiend!"

#34 In Lord of the Flys, the people of Smallville hear Nor when he whispers to his friend "Let's see how much he cares for Mom and Dad." (Talking about Jonathan and Martha.)

#35 - When Clark is shot in the night club in TOGoM, the bullets hit him at such an angle that they bounce off his chest, striking Capone and his gang. Clark is left standing, alive, and undamaged...and as shell-shocked from the turn of events as everyone else in the room.

#36 Someone overhears Perry saying the quote in my signature!

#37 - A mad dog (not Lois) tries to bite Clark in front of witnesses - its teeth shatter.

#38 - A maddened Lois tries to bite Clark - her teeth shatter!

#39 someone recognizes the takeout Clark brings as being from overseas

In one of the Superman movies extras, outtakes or the like, maybe S2, in traffic a car hits Clark Kent, dressed as Clark, and its entire front end is crushed. Clark has to turn, exit the front of the car, which is now u shaped around Clark.

I know this happens on Smallville, too.

And in the first episode of L&C, where Clark leaves a hand-shaped dent in the radiator of a bus.

41. When Superman arrives on the Prometheus and he sees the woman of his dreams, he instantly blurts out "Lo-is!" in his Clark Kent voice.

#42 - Clark wears his super suit beneath his clothes to work. However, he is wearing a white shirt that day. As he stands on the sidewalk with Lois, a taxi speeds by and splashs water from a puddle all over Clark. His thin white shirt is soaked and becomes transparent enough for Lois to see the suit beneath his work attire.

43. Martha is showing Lois all of Clark's embarrasing baby pictures and Lois spots the El symbol on Clark's blanket in a photo taken 25 years before Superman's debut.

Okay, don't hate me...

44. Clark takes Lois to see Dr. Klein one day, after hours of trying to get a word in edgewise, and announces that Lois is pregnant with Superman's baby. Lois responds with "Clark, I told you, I never slept with him! The baby is... oh!"

Sadly, both Lois and Clark are killed when she tries to shove a piece of green Kryptonite down his throat.

Fantastic, Virginia!

45. In "AKA Superman," when Penny runs the scan on Superman's secret identity, Jimmy's image isn't the only one that pops up. It launches a slide show of all possible candidates, starting with the most unlikely (Jimmy at 97% match) and ending with Clark Kent (99.5% match).

45a - fortunately numerous other people give the same score including the owner of a Las Vegas casino, the presenter of Ripley's Believe It or Not!, etc. etc.

#46. Lois and Clark try the adoption route again, sometime after their initial try. They are given the go-ahead after filing the initial paperwork. As part of the process, they both need to be fingerprinted for a background check. When Clark's prints are run, the computer makes a match - Superman's prints from years before when he was put in prison during the Metropolis heat wave.

#47. Bill Henderson searches Lex Luthor's home after Lois' almost-wedding. He finds the Kryptonite cage. Not knowing what he should do with the deadly substance, he turns to Lois and Clark for help, since they are Superman's friends. He brings out a stray piece to them to show them what he's found. Clark, already weak from his imprisonment, promptly passes out as soon as it is brought out.

#48 - Jerry and Perry White walk into the kitchen while Clark's powers are going haywire in Lethal Weapon.
#48a - On the plus side, now that Jerry knows Clark is Superman, he no longer wants to use his red Kryptonite against him. He gave his dad the red Kryptonite for safe-keeping. Perry sent it over to Dr. Klein.

#49 - When Dr. Klein tells Lois that the mayor is planning to shoot Superman with the Kryptonite (green) bullets (in Lethal Weapon), he also told her that he figured out that Clark was Superman during that time Superman became radioactive (Super Mann). He said it was obvious when he watched how Lois and Superman acted when she was supposed to be engaged to Clark.
#49a - On the plus side, Dr. Klein's going to double his efforts on testing Clark's fertility, now that he knows who Superman wants to knock-up.

#50 - Tim and Amber Lake actually had their "zoo" rigged with cameras and microphones. They witness all of Lois and Clark's tenderness while they talk things out from their seperate cages, including Lois calling him Clark.

All good ones! Shouldn't this one be #50, though?

Ha! Yes. Virginia must have edited her post as I was writing mine. Or I'm blind as a bat. One or the other.

#51 - Clark takes a nap out in the backyard. But he's very stressed around the time, and winds up floating in his sleep. He wakes up in the middle of the street, six feet above the ground, before the Daily Planet...with tons of people taking pictures.

52 - Lois' pap smear produces some seriously not-so-routine results; specifically, it included the presence of alien cells.

OMG! Priceless!

#53 - Clark is framed for murder while he is out of town on a rescue. His only way to prove his innocence is with an alibi. And that means confessing that he's Superman, and was actually saving lives at the time of the murder.

54) The courthouse installs a new X-ray system to check for weapons. Clark shows up as a solid mass because the X-rays won't penetrate. He's detained and they find the Suit when searching him.

#55 - Diana Stride actually had someone competent with her when she spied on Clark. When Clark opens his shirt to reveal the Superman suit beneath (when he's going to go to the hospital), the event is actually caught on film.

#56 - Clark is hit by a speeding car. The car is totalled, and yet, Clark is miraculously not splattered into a billion little pieces.

#57 - Lois and Clark are out in a storm. Clark offers Lois his arm (being the gentleman he is). A stray bolt of lightning hits him, and his powers transfer to Lois.

#58 - Lois becomes pregnant with Clark's baby. However, the pregnancy causes her to temporarily gain Clark's powers as well, but she can't control them. Clark is forced to admit the truth to the world when a very pregnant Lois Lane is seen spontaneously floating down the streets of Metropolis, and the attacks once more start about Lois and Superman having an illict affair.

Ooh... I'd love to see this one written up into a story. I can just imagine the backlash when the general population realizes Superman "lied" during his previous denial speeches. (well, technically Superman didn't lie in the second speech, but he did tell the truth with an intent to deceive.) With Superman no longer seen as perfect, trouble would definitely be a-brewing for poor Clark.

Joy,
Lynn

That's a really, good point, Lynn. I'd like to see that too. Unfortunately, my muse has already bitten off more than she can chew.

Hmm... ...

59. Superman ate the bomb on the Prometheus. Later on, when Clark's back at the Planet, it backfires on him... and bursts a hole through his pants, and everyone can see the tights underneath.

(Sorry for the potty humor. I couldn't help it. :p )

Hmm...

60. When Lois confesses her love for Superman in BatP, instead of turning her down, Superman agrees to date her, so she won't marry Luthor. Lois' decides that since they would have no privacy if they went out with him in the Super Suit, he needed to wear regular clothes to blend in. She borrows (steals) a set of jeans and a flannel shirt from Clark. Superman refuses to put them on, but then finally relents under Lois' constant badgering. When he finishes his spin, Lois sees Clark (sans glasses) in front of her instead of Superman and Clark's secret is out.

Good one, Virginia!

BTW, I don't know whether they could be re-used here, but some time back I posted a list of ten ways Clark should NOT reveal his secret to Lois.

Joy,
Lynn

Lynn - that was hilarious! I spit my tea out laughing at Number One!

Hi DC,

Sorry I didn't issue a spew alert. Glad you enjoyed the list, though.

Joy,
Lynn

#61 - Mayson survives the car bomb. Lois feels horrible about Mayson's situation, and goes to visit her in the hospital. While there, Mayson laments how she pursued Clark while despising his alter-ego, not knowing that Lois wasn't in on the secret.

One I once wrote a story about:
#62: Lois "convinces" Superman to be her date on a Halloween party, and insists he needs a real costume. She ruffles his hair and then proceeds to give him his Harry Potter Costume - s(p)ellotaped glasses included.

All great stuff, everybody! Lynn, I loved that piece! I think if you wanted, you could rephrase some of them and repost them on here (otherwise, I'd have to do some math and re-add them myself :rolleyes: ). But yeah, go at it, if you'd like.

Hi Mouserocks,

I love recycling old pieces. Thanks for giving me the chance to do so.

And now some revelations that Clark should be advised against trying:

63) Clark tells Lois via sky-writing or the Metropolis' stadium's scoreboard.

64) While exiting the Planet building with Lois, Clark says in his best mock-announcer voice, "Ladies and Gentlemen, Superman has just left the building."

65) Clark tells Lois, "You know how some people say that we are 'star-crossed lovers'? Well, that's kind of ironic, since I actually do come from a different star."

66) Clark changes a ceiling fixture's light bulb in front of Lois in his own, truly inimitable, manner. Or he complains that Perry is driving him up the wall, and then proceeds to demonstrate by walking up the nearest wall.

67) As Superman, Clark engages Lois in a game of, "If you were a kind of _____________, what would you be?" He then states, "If I were a kind of candy, I would be a Clark bar."

68) Clark plays strip poker with Lois while wearing "the suit" underneath his reporter attire. He purposely loses a few rounds.

69) Clark enlists the help of several colleagues to reenact the old game show, "To Tell the Truth." He has Jimmy and Perry sit beside him. He then rises when Cat asks, "Will the real Superman please stand up?"

70) Clark starts a discussion with, "You know how scientists theorize that space/time curves back on itself? Well, here's some proof: 'Before' is identical to 'way, way after'."

71) Clark serenades Lois with, "Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip that started out from Krypton, aboard a small spaceship."*

72) Clark sends Lois flowers with the following written on the enclosure card: Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am Clark Kent, and Superman too.

*#71 is a filk of the opening song of the old 'Gilligan's Island' sitcom. No copyright infringement is intended.

73. In "Illusions of Grandeur," when Dr. Novak mentions the phrase "moon and stars" to Clark, instead of leaving and turning into Superman, Clark does the same actions (knocking down parking meters, flying, etc.) while in his regular clothes. Of course, Lois sees this, as does the rest of Metropolis, and the secret's out with Clark having no memory of giving himself away in any way, shape or form.

73a. In "Illusions of Grandeur," when Dr. Novak mentions the phrase "moon and stars" to Clark, instead of leaving and turning into Superman, Clark turns into Superman on the spot.

74: (As in the animated series) Clark says "Well, Lois, the truth is I'm actually Superman in disguise, and I only pretend to be a journalist to hear about disasters as they happen and squeeze you out of a byline."

Unfortunately, in the L&C universe she believes him...

75. At the end of Church of Metropolis, when Lois asks Superman to dance, he responds with "At least Mayson can't interrupt us this time."

76: Clark wears a suit like the one in one of the "New 52" reboots.



It shouts "Farmboy" at her.

77. In "The Source" when Superman stops the subway train, Jonathan actually finishes his sentence by calling Superman "Clark". This raises some eyebrows, particularly when afterwards Clark whines "Daaaaaadd" and suddenly people are very interested in who the Kents really are and who their son might be.

78. In "Illusions of Grandeur," when Dr. Novak mentions the phrase "moon and stars" to Clark, he doesn't bother to change into his super suit. As a result, he winds up walking down the street, knocking over parking meters, as Clark Kent.

79. In the pilot, when Superman first meets Lois, she asks "What the hell are you?" to which Clark reflexively answers, "your partner."

80. Clark didn't have the strength to resist Lois in the harem outfit in Pheremone, My Lovely. They wound up going to bed together and while the are making love, Clark winds up floating them. Of course, at that moment, the spray wears off of Lois and she comes to full awareness...

81. It dawns on Lois in "Top Copy" that Diana showed up in the newsroom with the weird device that Superman shorted because it was a tracker for Superman. She decides that she wants to figure out what Clark does when he runs away to return a video or go to a forgotten dentist appointment. So as they are going back in at the end to finnish their chess game she kisses him with her lipstick that has a tracer in it.

Since Lois is only remotely tracking him he has no clue. The next day when Superman goes to help avert a plane crash in Mexico Lois notices Clark moving very fast and realizes that Diana was right and Clark really is Superman.

82. When Lois is getting ready to go on a cruise to dispose of that kryptonite bullet, she decides to show it to Clark first at which point he doubles over in pain and turns a bit "green" with nausea. Oops.

~~~~

LOL!

83. In "Return of the Prankster" Clark is actually there when Griffin and assistant freeze the newsroom, and brakes out of freeze mode to tie and gag them up before they get to Lois' computer. He tells Lois that he is Superman in the conference room while Griffin and his co-hort are still gagged. They go to Dr. Hamilton to get the contact lenses so they can claim that Clark had them in his eyes and that was why he was not stopped by Griffin's laser.

84. In "Witness" when Clark catches the bullets, Lois manages to see that Clark is holding a bullet in his hand before he disposes of it and realizes that Clark is Superman.

85. In "Man of Steel Bars" when Clark shows up not at all sweaty to the Daily Planet wearing his suit when even Perry is wearing shots some people realizes that he is Superman.

OK, I mainly put this one because it does not make sense that if he tries to fit in as Clark he would act in a way that causes him to stand out so much.

86. When Lois, Clark and Jimmy are all tied up in Lucky Leon's old factory and Clark says "I have sometime to tell you" and Lois responds "I like you too Clark", Clark responds back, "Well, that too, but Lois, I am Superman", thus Jimmy hears too.