Even though Lois wasn’t its star attraction, it was nice to be at an event with the best of her profession.
Ooooh! I totally forgot that we haven’t seen that one yet
This year, however, she was here to support Clark, hang off his arm decoratively, laugh at his jokes
Awww, she really does love him.
and try not to rip out his spleen for being nominated.
Or not.
She knew it wasn’t Clark’s fault that he was nominated instead of her.
Right. It’s not his fault for being the better reporter. Give me a break!
It was the fault of the Kerth Nomination Committee.
Ooops?
Lois turned to look at her date. He appeared nervous. It was strange that a journalism award meant so much to him when people, charities, and governments offered Superman awards every week or so.
It’s because he’s not sure whether it’d be better to win or lose, given that Lois isn’t nominated. Which one will him rather land in the sack with her?
Now, if Lois had been nominated, it would have been an entirely different scenario.
And can you imagine if she’d then lost to him?
“For her investigations of Lex Luthor’s dating habits and the disappearance of Dr. Brenda Muldoon that combined to lead her to the discovery of Lex Luthor’s secret underground bunker full of people missing since Nightfall, Catherine Grant from the Houston Chronicle.”
There it was, right where Lois’s name usually appeared. Catherine Grant. Appalling!
Well, that’s what Lois gets for slipping into the spot on the society page usually taken up by Cat Grant, or rather her interview victims.
Now, Lois had proof positive that the Kerth Committee had been drunk when they picked the nominees. Cat Grant nominated for a Kerth Award?
She’s a good reporter? Some might even say, Lois’s equal?
Jealous that Clark is only associating with women who excel in their respective professions?
MASYON: He’s not associating with me, so that’s not right.
Crossing her arms with a loud harrumph, Lois forced herself not to make a scene that would surely ruin Clark’s winning moment.
Actually, Cat will take care of that one.
“And the winner for the Kerth Award in Investigative Journalism goes to…” the emcee said, causing Lois to return her focus to the dais. “Catherine Grant!”
TEMPUS: Let’s say it together, shall we?
“Highway robbery!” Lois said once again, much to Clark’s chagrin.
But there have been several movies where lightly dressed or slightly undressed female desperados took advantage of the men riding or driving up and down some highway, alleviating them of their worldly possessions and maybe worldly existence.
Clark set his hand in the small of Lois’s back in hopes of reminding her to keep a civil tongue as they wended their way through the crowd to congratulate Cat.
Duct tape across Lois’s lips probably would’ve worked better.
Clark knew that if he let it, his mind would dwell on the not-so-hidden implication of her words. Then, his conscious and subconscious would let this wound fester as it endlessly debated whether it was something he had done differently than Lois’s true Clark in order not to have left tonight’s ceremony with an award.
Actually, the real Clark’s just a better journalist. More cultured. More experienced. Better with touchy-feely-stuff.
“If you knew, then why did you give me such a hard time when you weren’t nominated?” he asked, crossing his arms.
Because that’s how she was supposed to behave? Plus, leopards and spots.
“Knowing something isn’t an exact science,” she snapped before continuing across the banquet hall.
Actually…
Unfortunately, Cat’s acceptance speech did all but flat-out admit to everyone in the upper echelons of the newspaper business that the gossip columnist had started looking into Lex’s sex life because she knew Lois wasn’t giving the billionaire any and Cat had wondered who was.
Not to mention, bringing up Lois’s sex life, and/or the lack thereof, in such public forums.
But it’s already the primary topic of discussion at every news gathering in Metropolis, ever since the Claude incident
. He sighed, resigned that the two women he loved most would never see eye-to-eye
Maybe he shouldn’t mention that out loud to Lois.
and hurried to catch up with Lois before she stuck her foot into her mouth or, worse, her fist into Cat’s jaw.
![[Linked Image]](http://cosgan.de/images/midi/boese/a045.gif)
No hitting the pregnant lady.
“She saved my life,” he murmured. Lois stopped and turned to stare at him. He lowered his voice even quieter before continuing, “Superman’s life.”
Oops?
There was no way she was going to carry both that heavy glass sculpture and her belly without dropping one of them.
Regrettably, she saw that he was deep into a conversation with Jimmy and Jenny Olsen.
Awww, they flew up
Like Clark, Jimmy didn’t win, though.
Who did? Wally, for snapping those pics of the senator and two underage hookers in the Lexor’s indoor pool?
Barely in time, Cat stopped herself from exhaling with relief. Not a wise move in her current condition.
Evil!
Lois rolled her eyes and stated in a complete monotone as if Clark was feeding her lines she didn’t want to say, “Congratulations, Cat.”
He’s like a puppet master, controlling his little ventriloquist doll with his hand on her backside?
“Why don’t you just tell people the truth?” Lois asked her. “Stating the obvious always was your forté.”
Lois was right. Why hadn’t Cat just told that annoying yap-a-doodle from the New York Times that she needed to use the little girl's room?
Looky there, Lois is smart!
Cat wanted to slug them all. The ones who treated her with kid gloves and the ones who thought it was funny to make obnoxious, usually lewd, comments about her being pregnant.
It’s surprising the one about her knowing who the father is didn’t come up, though.
Cat hadn’t lost her mind and still wanted to discuss topics completely unrelated to her fertility, but apparently, nobody else thought she was able to do so.
But isn’t that because before she got pregnant, the topic of procreation was her main forte?
“Three, but Clark doesn’t have any, thanks to you,” Lois replied.
“Oh, boo-hoo. If you wanted him to have one so badly you should’ve added his name to your award-winning Prometheus story last year,
Buuuuurn!
The biggest night of her career and she was going to end up wetting herself.
Could have been worse. Could have been during her speech. Just imagine if the Prankster had shown up with his freezing ray, and either then or when she came to, well… She did get lucky there.
“It’ll be in bookstores next spring.”
“What? Couldn’t make the Christmas rush? Too bad,” Cat jabbed back.
Actually, next spring could mean right on time for Valentine’s day. That way, the story about the greatest aborted romance of the century could be bought, gifted, and enjoyed by all the couples to be.
“I… I was… I didn’t know he’d be there. I was looking for a way to contact you, because Clark had disappeared, but security wouldn’t let me in,” she said. “What’s up with that? I invited you to my wedding.”
“It wasn’t as if I could invite the Lois Lane. She might’ve brought Lex Luthor, and he certainly wasn’t welcome.”
But on the plus side, someone could have used the opportunity to slip a steak knife into his back. If properly done, it might nick his abdominal aorta and thirty seconds later, et voila, no more Luthor troubles.
Instead of looking more reassured by her words, Lois appeared sickened by them. Her face seemed to turn green. “It wasn’t me?” she echoed back, almost to herself, yet in a horrified tone.
Aww…she remembering the home video she and Lex made some time this spring, huh?
One of the women who interrupted them, said, “Congratulations on winning, Cat. So, how far along are you?” She reached out to touch Cat’s stomach.
Lois slapped the woman’s hand away. “She’s not Buddha. How’d you like it if she touched your body uninvited?”
But doesn’t it bring seven years of luck to rub a pregnant woman’s belly? And 77 if she’s carrying Superman’s child?
Clark rushed up. “Everything all right? I heard someone mention breaking waters.”
“Don’t you two jinx me now,” Cat scolded.
To be fair, pregnant women attending the Kerth ceremony usually go into labor during it. /points at Kerth archives and the Kerth Curse™/
“Cat admitted that you deserved to have her award as much as she does,” Lois replied.
Before Cat could correct her, Clark said, “Liar.”
I wonder how he detects it when Lois is lying…
She decided to blame the baby for making risky sex less alluring. Another benefit of pregnancy. Someone else to blame for things.
Also, mood swings. And midnight snacks. Which reminds me…
http://loveandcapes.com/comic/lnc22-41“That Cat and Jimmy had both gotten married? Not me,” Lois chuckled, hugging his arm. “I never would’ve bet on that.”
Too bad that Jimmy and Lucy are missing
“And expecting.”
Lois froze. “And what?”
Er what now? Also, wouldn’t that be just great, Lucy expecting from Jimmy? Lois would have a fit!
“I didn’t say that.” Clark cleared his throat, feeling guilty for implying that. Even more so, for believing it, too. “He said it was love at first sight.”
Well…at least, the blue lines?
“But that’s what you meant, isn’t it?” Lois prodded. “Cat and Phil had a one night stand…”
Strangely enough, that didn’t happen for Lois and Clark, though.
“Yes. It is strange that both of our friends had what were essentially one-night stands with people they had fallen in love with at first sight. They both ended up pregnant and married,” Lois concurred. “And yet it didn’t happen to us. Very strange, indeed.”
Maybe it’s the universe trying to compensate left and right?
“Do you wish that…?” His voice cracked as a tightness engulfed his chest. Did he really want to know the answer to that question?
She had proof that she had sex?
He had to agree, exhaling. These things seemed to happen in threes.
Maybe Lucy is pregnant after all?
“The one that reads ‘Once great reporter, now a wife and mother.’ No thanks,” she replied.
Clark could stay at home? Or maybe they could hire a professional caregiver when the New Krytponians show up?
Herb had said that Utopia had been founded by their descendants. That, therefore, implied that Clark could father children... should the fates allow them a curse-free existence.
Or maybe it’s the children begotten by the union of Clark and Mayson and the union of Lois and Call-Me-Daniel who when themselves forged a union?
They’re dirty, smelly, money sucking, noise making, time hogging, sleep-depriving, career-killing creatures.
Anyway, I was sure I’d be a train wreck as a mom.”
But Clark’s good at stopping, or at least, cleaning up, train wrecks.
Another strange thought crossed his mind. If Cat made one, and Jimmy made two, which one of his friends would be the third to fall in love at first sight, get married, and begin starting a family… not necessarily in that order?
Lois’s loving gaze brushed that conundrum away. Perhaps it was merely a coincidence, after all.
Which brings up…
http://www.mgonta.co.uk/comics/shorts/chekhovs-gun/Yes, this dimension is moving further away from canon with every part.
/checks watch/ Yes, Buffy should show up any minute now…
This last scene is dedicated to Darth Michael who always hopes for the impossible dream. wink
Aww…
Michael
