how about
mystic, CT? (as seen in the julia roberts movie "mystic pizza") or is that too touristy?
there are a bunch of little towns on cape cod. generally, they seem like what you're looking for, but the area does see a lot of tourists in the summertime.
actually, a friend of mine is from
new fairfield, CT. it's a little out of the way, on the boarder with NY. so, not exactly seaside, but he swears it's the "only small town in connecticut that you really need to know."
another friend grew up in
north attleboro, MA. sleepy little town just a little northeast of providence, RI. a little bit inland, but not too far. i went there for her wedding. it looked like it fit the bill. actually,
here are some pics of the church where she had her wedding.
other than that, you can go to mapquest and pick pretty much any small town in new england. check around near stamford (CT), mystic/new london (CT), newport (RI), plymouth (MA), boston (MA), salem (MA), kennebunkport (ME). each place has its own atmosphere, of course, but most should fit your needs, one way or another.
hope this helps.
Paul
