To pop everything into place... use Courier 10 (or 10 characters per inch) set top margin at 0.5", bottom margin at 0.5" (or minimums) (I had to tell the program that my primitive printer was using legal-size paper) left margin at 1" & right margin at 1" for pages---BEFORE TEASE Page For TEASE Page and after, left margin at 0.8 and right margin at .25 (or minimum) * and (X) used in script probably mean "this line changed from previous version" Notes: Cover: "sex, lies, and videotape", Story by Dan Wilcox, Teleplay by Andrew Dettmann & Daniel Truly, Directed by Philip J. Sgriccia" are all in large bolt print. The remainder of the text is in Courier 10 (10 characters per inch) Typos noted: "all right" misspelled as "alright" in several places Page 1 of script, first paragraph, Dais is capitalized for unknown reason; not capitalized later on. Page 2, scene 2, first paragraph, at end, no closing parenthesis Page 5, first paragraph under 3 Continued: two "with"s in second line are a typo --page break-- (graphic - insert logo.bmp or logo.jpg) "sex, lies, and videotape" EPISODE THIRTEEN Prod. #465213 Story by Dan Wilcox Teleplay by Andrew Dettmann & Daniel Truly Directed by Philip J. Sgriccia _Production Draft_ December 2, 1996 FULL Blue 12/6/96 Copyright info Pink Rev. 12/9/96 Yellow R. 12/10/96 Green Rev. 12/11/96 Gold Rev. 12/11/96 White. Rev. 12/17/96 Blue Blue 12/18/96 --page break-- _LOIS & CLARK_ "_sex, lies, and videotape_" FULL Blue 12/6/96 _CAST_ CLARK KENT/SUPERMAN LOIS LANE JIMMY OLSEN PERRY WHITE MARTHA KENT JONATHAN KENT ___________________________________________ RANDY GOODE SAMANTHA PRESIDENT KASPAROV GENERAL NAVANCE PRIEST * JEAN SALLY * BARRY DUNNING THUG STORE OWNER BIG HAIRED WOMAN OILY VINNIE-TYPE BROCK THOMPSON * SPANISH MAID BOY SCOUT * --page break-- _LOIS & CLARK_ "_sex, lies, and videotape_" Gold Rev. 12/11/96 _LOCATIONS_ _INTERIORS_: _EXTERIORS_: Daily Planet Metropolis Street Newsroom Perry's Office City Hall Hotel * Townhouse Living Room Union Station Goode's Conference Room Photo Lab Hotel * Goode's Building Rooftop TV Newsroom Embassy Photo Lab Town Car --page break-- _LOIS & CLARK_ "_sex, lies, and videotape_" Gold Rev. 12/11/96 _CHRONOLOGY_ SC. 1 - 8B DAY #1 SC. 9 - 11 DAY #2 SC. 12 - 19B NIGHT #2 SC. 20 - 20A DAY #3 SC. 21 - 27 DAY #4 SC. 28 - 33 NIGHT #4 SC. 34 OMITTED SC. 35 - 39 DAY #5 SC. 40 - 48 NIGHT #5 SC. 49 - 73 DAY #6 SC. 73A - 73B NIGHT #6 * --page break-- _LOIS & CLARK_ _The New Adventures of Superman_ "sex, lies, and videotape" _TEASE_ FADE IN: 1 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - DAY #1 1 A bustling reception. The mood is anticipatory, ebullient A Dais has been erected on city hall steps. STREET VENDORS ply Superman paraphernalia: T-Shirts, mugs, sweaters, etc. Various remote TV cameras record the proceedings. WE FIND LOIS and JIMMY moving through the crowd. JIMMY Wow -- look at this turnout LOIS It's not everyday someone from Metropolis wins The International (X) Peace Prize. JIMMY I can't believe Superman hasn't won it before now. LOIS I guess there was some question as to whether an extraterrestrial was actually eligible. JIMMY Well, alien or not, it's about time. Hey, how come you didn't go with Clark to Stockholm to cover the ceremony? LOIS Oh, well, you know... Clark's so much closer to Superman than I am. JIMMY (spots him) Speaking of our hero... Jimmy starts snapping pictures. TV CAMERAS SWIVEL. THE CROWD bursts into APPLAUSE as SUPERMAN appears, floating down from the sky, the gleaming medal in his hand. He lands at the dais next to A COUNCILMAN. As Jimmy and Lois move closer, CAMERA FINDS SAMANTHA, pretty, ambitious, following. Meanwhile, on the dais, Superman steps to the microphone: (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 2. 1 CONTINUED: 1 SUPERMAN Thank you... Thank you one and all for this generous reception... (hands him check) Councilman, I hope you'll donate this prize money on behalf of the people of Metropolis... 2 INT. RANDY GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY 2 2 High-rise, plush. PULL BACK from a WALL-SIZED TV and Superman's larger-than-life image to reveal billionaire RANDY GOODE (37), a young, Rupert Murdoch-type media mogul, watching with utter disdain. The walls are lined with POSTERS trumpeting Goode's sleazy worldwide media ventures ("All-Nudity Network," "The Violence Channel," "The Global Inquirer," "Dirt Digger Weekly," etc. Several MINIONS sit at the conference table, avoiding eye-contact with Goode as he growls at the monitor: SUPERMAN ... whom I share this award with because I am nothing if not a reflection of the people I proudly serve on a daily basis! The crowd erupts in CHEERS. Goode points the remote control at the monitor and lowers the VOLUME as: GOODE Yadda yadda yadda! Put a sock in it! You said the same thing last year when you stole the Metropolis Man Of The Year Award from me! I mean, how many awards can one guy _win_? Why don't I ever get a (X) freakin' prize? THUG (under his breath) Probably because you're the 'King of Sleaze... I (off Goode's glare) I mean _used_ to be, Mr. Goode... GOODE That's right, I'm a world famous philanthropist now. I've spent _millions_ rehabilitating my image, building homeless shelters, feeding the poor, crap like that. (MORE) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 3. 2 CONTINUED: 2 GOODE (CONT'D) Don't tell me I can't buy that peace prize, dammit, this is _America_! (barks) Who's covering that Flyboy? THUG Uh, that would be Samantha, sir... He hurriedly dials a cell phone, hands it to Goode. GOODE (at monitor) I'm _through_ losing to you, Mr. Family Values! Next year, _I'm_ going to be on that podium receiving the medal! (into phone) Samantha? Goode, here. What've you got, and it'd better be good. INTERCUT 2A EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - DAY 2A where Samantha, off to the side and on her cell phone, vamps. SAMANTHA Ah, Mr. Goode... well, to be honest with you, sir, I'm not sure what you expect me to find here... GOODE We've been over this! Mr. Wonderful _can't_ be that perfect, that morally pure. Why, my own (X) mother's a saint... still, I've rooted out a thing or two about her that had me screaming myself to sleep! SAMANTHA I understand, sir... but it's daylight out, there're nuns and boyscouts here... (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 4. 2A CONTINUED: 2A GOODE That's your problem! Your orders are to find a crack in that (X) granite-like exterior of his -- one that I can exploit with all the power at my command! Don't disappoint me! (X) BANG! He hangs up in her ear. She looks wearily over the crowd toward Superman at the dais... In the conference room, Goode barks at his minions: GOODE (CONT'D) Don't just sit there, fan out (X) want dirt! (X) (as they quickly scatter) Not you, Johnson. You're riding down with me... (leads him to elevator) ... Now about that little 'King of Sleaze' crack -- THUG I'm sorry about that, Mr. Goode. I don't know what I was thinking. I didn't mean anything by it, really. Goode lifts a flap and pushes a special "down" button as the elevator doors open. GOODE That's okay, Johnson. (extends hand) Just don't let it happen again. The Thug starts to shake his hand, but Goode shoves him backward into the elevator shaft and he DROPS like a rock with a blood curdling CRY. Goode pushes the button, closes the flap and walks away as the doors close. 3 EXT. CITY HALL - DAY 3 The ceremony has ended. Superman signs autographs, glad-hands in the distance . Jimmy turns to Lois JIMMY (re his camera) I better get these shots in the soup so we'll have a front page. Jimmy moves off. Lois approaches Superman LOIS Superman! How 'bout an interview? (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 5. 3 CONTINUED: 3 He sees her, excuses himself from the others, joins her. We TRACK with with Lois and Superman as they stroll; she pretends to take notes as they talk. LOIS (CONT'D) I missed you SUPERMAN Well, I'm not actually back, yet. Clark Kent's flight doesn't get in until midnight. LOIS Great so for the rest of the day I have to pretend like my husband's still in the air. This isn't exactly the kind of welcome-home I had in mind A RECEPTION-GOER passes. Lois quickly raises her notepad SUPERMAN (covers) Actually, I had no idea I was going to win the award, Ms. Lane... (once they're clear) So what exactly'd you have in mind? LOIS Oh, a weekend in bed in a mountain hideaway where not everything will be done,in super speed... He arches an eyebrow as she inconspicuously brushes her fingertips across the back of his hand. REVEAL: 4 ACROSS THE STREET - SAMANTHA 4 hiding behind a truck, _video-taping_ them. 5 MATTE SHOT THROUGH VIDEO-CAMERA 5 as the lens ZOOMS in on the hand brush, then TILTS UP to catch Lois and Superman exchanging a brief intimate look. 6 RESUME SAMANTHA 6 lowering the camera like she's just won the lottery. FADE OUT _END OF TEASE_ --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 6. _ACT ONE_ FADE IN: 7 INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - ON WALL-SIZED TV - DAY 7 ON SCREEN, an "LNN SPECIAL REPORT" TITLE CARD. A NEWSCASTER narrates: BROCK THOMPSON And now, this special report (X) The Title Card gives way to NEWS FOOTAGE of TWO SOUR-LOOKING MEN emerging from their respective limos in front of the EMBASSY BUILDING. They are the Serbo-Croation versions of Nixon and Breszhnev: PRESIDENT KASPROV and GENERAL NAVANCE. An amazing amount of eyebrow-bushiness between them. And obviously not a whole lotta love happening. Superman greets them at the steps as the POLICE hold the media at bay. BROCK THOMPSON After weeks of stalled talks, the leaders of Eastern European nations Latislan and Podansk arrived in Metropolis today in an attempt to diffuse escalating tensions. The break came when the United Nations asked Superman, fresh from winning the International Peace Prize, to (X) mediate the talks. (X) 8 ANGLE - GOODE 8 jaw clenched, pacing back and forth in front of the TV, hating what he's witnessing. ON the monitor: SUPERMAN (greets him) President Kasparov, it's an honor. PRES. KASPAROV The honor is mine, Superman. It is only because of you, the shining symbol of truth and justice, that my people are even willing to discuss peace -- even though we have suffered far too long at the hands of our neighbors... INTERCUT --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 7. 8A EXT. EMBASSY BUILDING - CONTINUOUS 8A(X) as, not surprisingly, the General butts in (X) GEN. NAVANCE You have suffered only because of the brutality you have perpetrated against us, Kasparov. (X) PRES. KASPAROV What I'm trying to say is, (X) Superman, is that my country has (X) suffered deceit and trickery before. We have had promises made, and promises broken. GEN. NAVANCE As have my people, which is why (X) you are our last hope, our only (X) hope at averting war! You are the (X) one and only person both sides (X) trust. (X) SUPERMAN Sirs. If you're both willing to be truthful with me, _and_ with each other, then together I believe we can find the road to peace. The General and the President exchange a dubious look as... 8B GOODE MUTES THE TV 8B GOODE (grumbling) (X) Oh, great -- now he's gonna stop a war. I think I'm gonna puke... Then, Samantha excitedly rushes in holding a video tape. SAMANTHA Mr. Goode, great news! I think I saw something I wasn't supposed to (X) see while Lois Lane was (X) interviewing Superman! (X) GOODE (dryly) What? His cape blew up revealing (X) panty lines? SAMANTHA Better. Seems like everybody's hero might be doing some very _un_heroic things with a certain ace reporter... (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 8. 8B CONTINUED: 8B She pops the cassette into the VCR and hits PLAY. The wall-sized TV switches to Samantha's tape of the teaser scene between Lois and Superman. She's jotting down notes. GOODE That's it? He's giving her an interview, big deal! (darkening) Come over here by my elevator. I want to show you something SAMANTHA Wait -- watch their body language. See the way they look around, like they're looking to see if anybody's watching? And now, this -- On the MONITOR, CAMERA ZOOMS in on Lois brushing Superman's hand, then TILT UP to Lois and Superman exchanging an intimate gaze. Samantha hits PAUSE, freezing that image. (X) GOODE (at monitor; intrigued) (X) Interesting... SAMANTHA I did some checking, too. Lois (X) Lane has had virtually every exclusive with Superman since he flew onto the scene four years ago. Not only that -- but do you have any idea how many times he's saved her bacon? Literally dozens of times. Now how many people are that 'accident' prone? GOODE (liking this) Are you telling me Superman's knockin' red boots with a married woman? SAMANTHA That's my guess. GOODE Your 'guess' ain't good enough. We're going to need proof and corroborating evidence to back it up. Samantha, off the "Dirt Digger" poster on the wall, with (X) the headline "Woman Gives Birth to Her Own Mother!" -- (X) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Blue Blue 12/18/96 9. 8B CONTINUED: 2 8B SAMANTHA Gee, we've never bothered with that before, Mr. Goode. GOODE Yes, but this is Superman we're talking about here. We have to be totally scrupulous -- as disturbing as that may seem. 9 INT. DAILY PLANET - DAY #2 9 Lois is checking the morning paper. Headline: SUPERMAN TO (X) BROKER PEACE TALKS. Clark approaches. (X) CLARK Here's another Superman scoop -- he's got a plan to get both sides (X) to disclose the locations of their respective nuclear weapons, and (X) allow him to simply destroy them. LOIS Which means they won't be able to annihilate each other. They'll have to talk peace. I like it. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Blue Blue 12/18/96 10. 9 CONTINUED: 9 CLARK You know, you seem to get a lot of credit for these Superman exclusives? What do I get? LOIS How about two days and two nights up in the mountains ... (wiggles an eyebrow) ... at Chateau Roberge? She holds up airline tickets. CLARK Wow. Chateau Roberge is supposed to be an ultra-exclusive hideaway for the rich and famous. How'd you get us in? LOIS (evasive) I have my ways. Clark's eyes flick past Lois -- to the CONFIRMATION LETTER in her hand. She quickly hides it behind her back. CLARK What's that? LOIS What's what? CLARK That the hotel's confirmation letter? LOIS A woman has to have a few secrets. CLARK Let me see, let me see Clark tries to reach around her to get it, but Lois side-steps him. Clark eyes her, starting to get suspicious. CLARK Lois... (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 10A. 9 CONTINUED: 2 9 LOIS Who cares how I got us in? Point is, we're in. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Blue Blue 12/18/96 11. 9 CONTINUED: 3 9 Lois desperately flings the letter into her SHREDDER, then -- WHIRRR, it's confetti. She smiles, moves away. Clark checks, makes sure no one is watching, then grabs the shredded pieces and IN SUPERSPEED REASSEMBLES the letter with tape. LOIS Not fair CLARK (reads) 'Dear Ms. Lane. We are very excited about your proposed article featuring our chateau...' Clark looks at Lois, troubled. CLARK (CONT'D) But... you're not writing an article, are you? LOIS I might someday. (X) CLARK So, you lied to them. LOIS Clark, please. It was a fib. (off his silence) An exaggeration. A minor distortion. (caves) Alright, it _was_ a lie. But only of the little, white variety. No one got hurt. It's not like we're getting it for free or anything. CLARK (skeptically) Lois... Lois throws up her hands. LOIS Fine. You take the moral high ground, I'll cancel the reservations. You can spend the weekend with those two old war horses, instead, get a jump on the peace talks. She picks up the phone to dial. Clark grabs her hand. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 12. 9 CONTINUED: 3 9 CLARK On second thought, since they won't have their proposals drawn up until Monday, it's the perfect time to get away with you. LOIS (off TV's) Looks like you may not be able to anyway Clark follows her look to: 10 ANGLE - TV MONITORS 10 The Newscaster with military build-up FOOTAGE behind him:. (X) BROCK THOMPSON (X) Even though the leaders of (X) Latislan and Podansk are set to (X) meet with Superman, the U.N. has confirmed that the military build up continues on both sides of the border 11 RESUME LOIS AND CLARK 11 reacting to that. LOIS I guess I'd better cancel those reservations anyway. CLARK No, don't. You go on up, I'll meet you there (makes flying motion) Superman's going to have a little chat with those old war horses, get them to honor their truce. LOIS (loosens his tie) Don't be long... They kiss, then he heads off. Lois sighs heavily, steadying, herself. She'll never get used to this. Just then, a VOICE calls out -- SAMANTHA (O.S.) Lois Lane... (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Blue Blue 12/18/96 13. 11 CONTINUED: 11 Lois turns to find Samantha behind her. She's holding a stack of papers, playing the awed motormouth fan. SAMANTHA (CONT'D) Okay, you don't know me, I'm just some pencil-pusher in research. (X) I'm Samantha. And you're my idol! (X) Lois smiles as her hand is pumped up and down LOIS Why thank you, Samantha. Nice to meet you. Samantha sidles closer, following Lois gaze out the door. SAMANTHA That husband of yours is quite the hunk, isn't he? I mean, he's no Superman, of course, but what the hey, you can't have everything. LOIS Excuse me... ? SAMANTHA What's Superman like anyway? LOIS Like? SAMANTHA Is he, like, seeing anyone? (X) 'Cause if he's not, I was thinking maybe you could do a girlfriend a favor -- introduce me. 'Course, I don't even know if he dates outside his species. (X) Lois just looks at her for a beat, then: (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 14. 11 CONTINUED: 2 11 LOIS Look, I hate to be rude, but I have a plane to catch SAMANTHA Oh, sure... we'll talk later. Samantha watches her go, then notices the reconstructed confirmation letter on her desk. She takes a closer look. 12 OMITTED 12 13 INT. HOTEL - NIGHT #2 13(X) Lois is alone in the ritzy suite, by the roaring fire. VARIOUS SHOTS as she unpacks her bags, reads a book, checks her watch, plays solitaire, checks her watch, etc. She's BORED, shuffling a deck of cards for the twentieth time... 14 EXT. HOTEL - COURTYARD - NIGHT 14(X) To establish the rear entrance, with stacks of lawn chairs, (X) piles of snow, and a fountain frozen over with icicles. (X) Reveal Samantha, peering over a trash can, shivering her (X) butt off, looking up at Lois' second story room. She (X) whispers into her cell-phone. (X) SAMANTHA No, she's alone, Mr. Goode. She registered as Mr. and Mrs. Kent, but he's nowhere to be seen. It's been just her for hours. She's been watching TV, playing cards, she even rearranged the furniture (X) a couple of times... (hears something) Wait, I think somebody's coming. I'll call you back... Samantha hangs up and ducks behind the trash can, then a (X) WHOOSH -- and Superman BLURS onto the second story balcony. (X) He looks around, sees the coast is clear, then knocks on (X) the glass. Lois opens the door, thrilled to see him. (X) SUPERMAN Sorry I'm late. Long day at the office. He enters, scoops her up in his arms and closes the door. (X) CRANE DOWN to find Samantha looking up -- this is too good (X) to be true! She slogs through the snow, climbs up the (X) ladder, her shoes slipping slightly on the icy rungs. (X) Then, she preps her camera, takes a deep breath and strains (X) to peer into the window -- (X) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 15. 15 15 THRU OMITTED THRU 16 16 17 INT. HOTEL - SAMANTHA'S POV 17(X) as Superman and Lois melt into one another, he carries her over to the bed, arms and legs entwined -- 18 EXT. HOTEL - SAME 18(X) Samantha just barely manages to squeeze off a shot (X) before -- she looses her balance and starts to fall! She (X) protects the camera as she drops two stories into a pile of (X) snow. (X) 19 INT. HOTEL - SAME 19(X) Superman breaks his lip-lock and turns toward the sound. LOIS What's the matter? SUPERMAN Thought I heard something. 19A THROUGH THE HOTEL WALL (X-RAY VISION) 19A(X) He scans outside, sees nothing. (X) 19B RESUME - SUPERMAN AND LOIS 19B SUPERMAN (back to her) Where were we ... ? Lois grabs him, pulls him down out of FRAME -- FADE OUT _END OF ACT ONE_ --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 16 _ACT TWO_ FADE IN: 20 EXT. UNION STATION - DAY #3 20 Samantha emerges from the station, arm in a sling, camera bag over her shoulder, barely able to contain her excitement as she dials her cell phone: (X) SAMANTHA (into phone) Mr. Goode! You're not gonna believe this. Right after I hung up with you, guess who flew into Lois Lane's room? That's right -- _Superman_! And within, like, seconds they were sucking face like world-class mattress tramps! She's BUMPED by the crowd -- the camera bag slips off her (X) one good shoulder and hits the ground. Panicked, she lunges for it, and when she pulls out the CAMERA, she notices the BACK IS OPEN! She desperately slams the camera back shut. WE HEAR GOODE's GARBLED VOICE coming from her cell phone. SAMANTHA (CONT'D) (beat, vamps) I'm sorry, sir, what? Uh, the picture? Yes, yes, I got the picture! Oh, I think I definitely got an exposure... Yes, I'll get it developed right away. Okay, bye... (hangs up; dies) Oh, God... Samantha stands there a moment, trying to figure out what in the hell to do -- then retrieves an address book from her purse and frantically thumbs through it: 20A INSERT - ADDRESS BOOK 20A as her finger finds a phone number for HANK'S PHOTO LAB. DISSOLVE TO: 21 EXT. METROPOLIS STREETS - DAY #4 21 as -- PLOP -- a bundle of morning editions of the "Global Inquirer" drops INTO FRAME -- plastered with the PHOTO of Superman and Lois Lane bed-wrestling (the way WE saw them)! SWISH PAN TO: --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 17. 22 INSERT - ANOTHER BUNDLE 22 of "Dirt Digger Weekly" drops INTO FRAME with the same incriminating photograph! 23 MONTAGE - HEADLINES 23 as they SPIN INTO FRAME screaming -- "SUPERMAN AND SUPER-REPORTER IN SUPER SCANDAL!", --METROPOLIS HERO CAUGHT WITH HIS TIGHTS DOWN!", "INTERNATIONAL PRIZE WINNER A DISGRACE." 23A EXT. HOTEL (TIGHT ON TV MONITOR) - DAY 23A(X) where reptilian TV talk-show host BARRY DUNNING (40's), bundled up against the cold, nevertheless fans the flames: BARRY DUNNING Barry Dunning, here, live from the scene of the crime where this sordid tale of super-sleaze took place... 24 EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY 24 As shocked and appalled PASSERSBY swarm the kiosk like bees to honey, buying up every copy they can get their hands on. We HEAR them ad lib: PASSERSBY (various) I can't believe it! -- Superman a home-wrecker? -- Poor Clark! -- Lois Lane's a slut! -- What are we going to do now?! DISSOLVE TO: 25 INT. DAILY PLANET - DAY 25 Lois and Clark return to the Daily Planet, still snuggling, completely oblivious to the headlines. But as they come in the door, all activity slams to a stop. Suddenly, you can hear a pin drop. Everyone is staring at them -- especially at Lois. Lois feels all the eyes on her. Gives herself the once over. LOIS Okay, so this blouse isn't a perfect match for this skirt, but it's not _that_ bad! Jimmy steps forward. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 18. 25 CONTINUED: 25 JIMMY You guys haven't seen this morning's National Inquisitor have (X) you? LOIS That supermarket rag? Why would we? JIMMY Or the Dirt Digger? CLARK Of course not. Jimmy, what's going on around here? Jimmy reluctantly raises both papers. Needless to say, Lois and Clark react stunned. They snatch the papers out of Jimmy's hand. LOIS Oh my God -- Clark CLARK Lois... LOIS That's -- me... CLARK And -- Superman... TH-THUNK! Now their jaws hit the floor. Roll around a bit. They exchange a guilty look. Meanwhile, Jimmy pastes on a grin, ever the loyal supporter. JIMMY Guys, let me just be the first to say, I don't believe it for a second. The photograph's a fake. Absolutely phony! Unequivocally bogus! (winces, examining it up close) Although I gotta say it's a pretty convincing job. I've never seen work this good. The light-source angles match, grain is completely uniform, there isn't a single visible matte line... LOIS Jimmy... (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 19. 25 CONTINUED: 2 25 JIMMY Sorry. On your team. One hundred percent. Perry calls out from his office -- PERRY Lois? Clark? In my office. 26 INT. PERRY'S OFFICE - DAY 26 Lois and Clark enter, shut the door, quick to explain: LOIS Chief, first of all, I just want you to know... PERRY (interrupts) Of course I don't believe it, Lois. I know you'd never do anything like that to Clark. Why, I've never (X) seen people in love like you two. It's just tabloid trash, pure and simple! Lois and Clark smile, take each other's hand. CLARK Thanks, Chief. PERRY That said, this thing's already blown up pretty good. The Planet hasn't taken any sort of official position yet -- but I can't sit on my hands much longer. The fellas upstairs are breathing down my neck to get this mess wiped up already. (beat) So, what do you want me to do? What do we print? Lois and Clark share an uneasy look. LOIS I have absolutely... CLARK ... no idea. --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 20. 27 INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY 27 27(X) Randy Goode stands in front of the wall-sized TV, working his remote like a six-gun, cackling with glee as he zaps through show after show doing stories on "The Photo". He's got phones resting on his shoulders, one in his hand. Samantha is by his side. GOODE (flipping channels) Ha-haa! This is fantastic! They're all picking it up. Every station, every show, every wire! Superman's blood is in the water and every shark is swimming in to take a bite! SAMANTHA You're a genius, Mr. Goode. GOODE First of all, yes I am. Second of all, call me Randy. 'Cause you just moved up the ladder, Miss _Vice President_! SAMANTHA (big smile) Are you serious? GOODE As a heart attack! This is the biggest story of the year. Superman's image is fading faster than Michael Bolton's hairline. This is fabulous! And for the first time, one of our stories is actually authentic! Samantha's new joy is dwindled a bit. GOODE (CONT'D) But this is no time to let up. We've gotta _really_ stoke the fires, orchestrate a full-tilt (X) smear campaign against Superman anything goes, even if it's a lie! The more outrageous, the better (X) (seeing the headlines) 'Superman used his x-ray vision to peep at my sister!' 'Superman dropped me while flying -- and I smelled booze on his breath!' (X) Goode straightens his tie, supremely cocky, looks over at Samantha -- (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 21. 27 CONTINUED: 27 GOODE We don't need kryptonite to destroy Superman -- we've got the most powerful weapon ever invented, a scandal. And we're gonna bring Superman down with it, then there'll be a new Man of the Year -- _me_, Randy Goode! (to Samantha) I want you to stick to Lois Lane (X) like Velcro from here on out. You (X) got that? (X) Off Samantha, nodding uneasily: (X) 28 INT. TOWNHOUSE NIGHT #4 - ON THE TV 28 ON a PRIEST being interviewed by Barry Dunning: (X) PRIEST (X) I'm most concerned about the (X) children, Barry. Superman was (X) their one undisputed moral (X) reference point. If this terrible (X) tragedy turns out to be true (X) BARRY DUNNING How can our kids take morality (X) seriously if the Pillar of (X) Morality himself has committed (X) adultery, is that your point, (X) Father? PRIEST (X) Exactly... 29 REVEAL LOIS AND CLARK 29 on their couch soberly watching. Lois has the dreaded tabloid paper in her hands, Clark hits the remote: 30 ON THE TV 30 as the channel turns to find JEAN SALLY (Leeza Gibbons), on (X) the streets, interviewing a SPANISH MAID: (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 22. 30 CONTINUED: 30 SPANISH MAID ...I used to clean Miss Lois' house before she was married and, I know I wasn't supposed to be looking, but many times I saw Mr. Superman fly into her bedroom and -- ayyy! (X) LOIS (appalled) I've never seen that woman before in my life! JEAN SALLY ... Thank you Mrs. Lopez. (turns to Camera) ... This shocking story continues to rock people everywhere... (X) ON the TV, Tape rolls: STORE OWNER I mean, it's a tragedy. I got a four and a five year old, what am (X) I supposed to tell them? Superman (X) was their hero... BIG-HAIRED WOMAN I used to look up to Lois Lane. I felt that I could trust her reporting, but now -- this is all her fault, she's the one who seduced him. Poor Clark Kent... OILY VINNIE-TYPE I think it's awesome! You think I wouldn't be out baggin' babes if I had super powers? Fuggeddeboutit! Lois takes the remote out of Clark's hands, lowers the (X) VOLUME as other INTERVIEWS continue on the TV: (X) LOIS I've heard enough of this trash. Let's just focus on getting to the bottom of this, okay? CLARK The bottom of what? LOIS The bottom of whoever's behind trying to destroy your image. (MORE) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 23. 30 CONTINUED: 2 30 LOIS (CONT'D) Something like this doesn't just happen by Accident. Someone's out to get you -- CLARK Or you. Lois, Superman wasn't supposed to be at Chateau (X) Roberge... Lois Lane and Clark (X) Kent were... She considers that for a beat, then: LOIS Right, well, either way, the first thing we have to do is find out who took the picture. (off tabloid) It's uncredited, which is suspicious considering all the notoriety it's caused. You know the photographer'd be on the interview circuit by now if there wasn't more to it. CLARK That's true, but... LOIS (no buts) I guess it's just the price we pay for being in the public eye. Every once and a while, someone takes a pot shot at us. Just like last year when that woman claimed she'd had Superman's 'love child.' CLARK Yeah, but there's a big difference, Lois -- that was a lie. This _isn't_. This actually happened. LOIS No, _this_ didn't happen. This says Lois Lane cheated on her husband and we both _know_ that's not true. CLARK Yeah, but the point is the rest of the world doesn't know that, and there's no way of telling them the _real_ truth. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 24. 30 CONTINUED: 3 30 LOIS Then I'll just deny it ever happened. Issue a statement saying it's a hoax, someone was impersonating me! CLARK Lois... LOIS (not hearing him) Better yet, Superman can do it. He can call a press conference, say it wasn't us. Everyone will believe him! CLARK Wait a minute, you're seriously suggesting _Superman_ lie?! LOIS I'm suggesting we do whatever it takes to find out who's out to get me, or you, or both of us, that's what I'm suggesting. CLARK I agree that's important, but there's a larger issue here, the _truth_. And the truth is that's you and me in that picture. Lying (X) for Superman should never be an (X) option. LOIS (defensive) Including 'white' lies, right? Like the one I told that got us into that hotel and therefore into this mess? CLARK I didn't say that. LOIS Not even thinking it? CLARK No! LOIS Now who's lying?! (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 25. 30 CONTINUED: 4 30 CLARK Lois, this is _our_ fault. We've gotten lax. We forgot that it's not just two people in this marriage, it's _three_ -- you, me and Superman. We're so used to the suit being a disguise... but it can't disguise how I feel about you. How we feel about each other. Lois absorbs the truth in that, as they both calm down. LOIS Okay, so when asked, we just (X) simply say no comment.' That's it. It's nobody's business. How (X) long can this thing last, anyway? (X) Clark glances at the TV, notes something, picks up the remote, RAISES the VOLUME. 31 ANGLE - THE TV 31 Brock Thompson, at his anchor's desk: BROCK THOMPSON It appears at this hour that the leaders of Latislan and Podansk have called off the peace talks because Superman can no longer be trusted. War appears inevitable now... 32 RESUME - LOIS AND CLARK 32 exchanging a dour look. CLARK I think it's going to last longer than we think... He flips the channel again: --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 26. 33 ANGLE - THE TV 33 ON the street, where a teary-eyed BOY SCOUT looks directly into camera: BOY SCOUT I don't believe in Superman anymore... FADE OUT _END OF ACT TWO_ --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 27. _ACT THREE_ FADE IN: 34 OMITTED 34 35 INT. BULLPEN - DAY #5 35 As Perry and Lois emerge from the elevator with sober looks: LOIS Well, that was fun. PERRY Aw, you know the Board -- they're (X) all just a bunch of stuffed shirts looking to cover their backsides. Don't you worry, honey. No matter how bad this gets, there's no way I'm gonna let them fire you. LOIS (realizes) Wait -- they want to _fire_ me?! Perry, realizing he's put his foot in it, softens it: PERRY Well, you know -- they overreact to everything. You hang in there, now... Perry moves off, then Lois notices fellow Planeteers giving her reproving looks as they pass. She finds herself at: 36 THE TV MONITORS 36 where Lois' face (from Samantha's earlier video) appears beneath an unfurling "TOP COPY" banner. PROMO ANNOUNCER Tonight on 'Top Copy': It seems Lois Lane isn't the _only_ woman Superman has been seeing... Onscreen, Lois' face is replaced by a shot of two flashy IDENTICAL TWINS (25), each wearing Superman T-shirts. PROMO ANNOUNCER (CONT'D) Meet the Texas Twins who claim Superman's cape has hung on their bed knob a time or two! --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 28. 37 RESUME - LOIS 37 ready to seize a piston, as Clark approaches: CLARK How're you holding up? LOIS Well, considering I'm one notch below Cruella DeVille on the (X) popularity scale, great. They start over to their desks: LOIS (CONT'D) Every where I turn it's cold stares and colder shoulders. It's like everybody's blaming me for bringing down their hero. CLARK If it makes you feel any better, they're not too crazy about their hero, either. The ladies in the steno pool are using Superman's picture for a dart board. LOIS I'm sorry, I'm sure this is all really tough on... Lois reacts as they arrive at Clark's desk and finds it adorned with condolence cards, balloons, baked goods, etc. LOIS (CONT'D) ... you... What's all this? CLARK Oh, uh -- condolence gifts for me. LOIS Homemade fudge? CLARK Couple of the women downstairs whipped it up. LOIS Oh. I see. I eat crow, you get fudge. CLARK Half of me gets the fudge, the other half ducks darts. I don't know how to react to people anymore. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 29. 37 CONTINUED: 37 LOIS Well, I do. I'm tired of being (X) the bad guy, when the _real_ bad (X) guy's the creep who took that (X) photo of us. (X) CLARK But Lois, even if we find the guy, (X) it doesn't mean this is just going to blow over. The truth is -- LOIS (cuts him off) I know what the truth is, okay? You've only reminded me about it a thousand times... They both take a breath. LOIS (CONT'D) Let's not fight, okay? Let's just concentrate on doing everything we can to salvage Superman's image. The world needs its hero back before it falls apart at the seams. CLARK (notices something) It may be too late... She follows his look to the TV MONITORS as people crowd around and watch: INTERCUT: 38 TV SCREENS 38 The newscaster reads from a piece of copy -- BROCK THOMPSON ... With peace talks broken down because of the Superman scandal, boarder skirmishes have erupted between Latislan and Podansk. U.N. troops report short range missiles already airborne -- The Planeteers hold their breath. Lois looks to Clark, but he's mysteriously vanished. She looks around for him, then HEARS: BROCK THOMPSON (CONT'D) -- Wait a minute... sources now say an unidentified object is streaking to intercept one of the missiles... --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 30. 38A EXT. SKY - DAY 38A(X) as a missile rockets away FROM CAMERA. After a beat, a (X) familiar BLUE BLUR comes out of nowhere and then -- BOOM! (X) The missile explodes. 38B RESUME DAILY PLANET 38B ON TVs, as the newscaster listens through his earpiece. (X) BROCK THOMPSON (CONT'D) (X) ... Apparently, that unidentified (X) object was Superman. He's- (X) detonated the missile and is apparently headed off to do the same to the others... JIMMY (watching; proud) Alright, Superman! His enthusiasm is met with sober reactions. LOIS Jimmy, I need your help. JIMMY Name it. LOIS (with file) I've tracked down six labs the rags use to develop their photographs. JIMMY You mean who they use to fake photographs.... LOIS (realizes, covering) Uh... yeah, right. That's what I. meant. JIMMY Because I've done some checking, too. See, there's only certain places in town who specialize in that kind of high-tech, digital compositing. Whoever faked that photo, had to go through one of those labs to pull it off. (heading off) I'll try to have a list for you by the end of the day. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 31. 38B CONTINUED: 38B LOIS (forced) Great... Oh, but uh, I think you should follow up on these other labs first. Just got an instinct that's where we'll find what we're looking for... 39 ANGLE ON SAMANTHA 39 She's been eavesdropping from a desk just a short distance away. A worried look of CONCERN plays across her face. 40 EXT. DAILY PLANET - NIGHT #5 40(X) Lois exits the Daily Planet. Looks up at the sky. Takes a deep breath of fresh air. It's just what she needs, until... VOICE (CONT'D) Lois Lane!! BARRY DUNNING sprints toward her, microphone in hand, (X) CAMERAMAN at his side! Before Lois can move, they've swooped down on her -- DUNNING (CONT'D) Ms. Lane, I'm Barry Dunning. LOIS (extremely wary) I know who you are. DUNNING Then you're familiar with my show, 'In Your Face with Barry Dunning!' LOIS (sarcastic) Riveting journalism, Mr. Dunning. Particularly your show on 'Cross-Dressing Cousins and the Has-Been Child Stars Who Love Them.' DUNNING (smiles, flattered) Hey, thanks. That means a lot coming from you. (back to ambush) Ms. Lane, I want to give you the chance to tell your side of the story -- (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 32. 40 CONTINUED: 40 LOIS Uh no comment. Lois turns, heads up the street. Dunning gives chase. (X) DUNNING What about the photograph, Lane? LOIS No comment. DUNNING Are you or are you not having an affair with Superman? LOIS No comment! DUNNING Well, what do you say to those who are calling you 'Superman's Super Strumpet?' Lois stops short, suddenly wounded. LOIS They're calling me Super Strumpet? DUNNING Care to respond? LOIS No! She starts walking away again. DUNNING Oh, c'mon, Ms. Lane. I'm only after the _truth_! Lois stops short again. But this time, when she turns around, the pain in her eyes has been replaced with VENOM. Now she's on the offensive, driving Dunning back LOIS The truth means nothing to you, you're only after sleaze! You (X) should be _ashamed_ of yourself; you _and_ your quote - unquote journalism. You're a disgrace to legitimate reporters like Clark and myself! (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 33. 40 CONTINUED: 2 40 WHAAAM! Dunning is backed up against a light post. Lois leans into his face (and thee camera). LOIS You won't find what you're digging for here, vulture-boy. I'm not about to hand you a sound-bite that you can twist and turn. Whatever my relationship is with Superman, it's nobody's damn business but my own -- now get outta my face! And with that, she turns on her heel and stalks off. 41 INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - NIGHT 41 The room has taken on a transformation -- all the sleaze posters have been replaced with fine art. General Navance and President Kasparov are there, as are their respective Aide-De-Camps. GOODE (offers to Navance) Caviar, General? (then offers) President Kasparov, canape? PRES. KASPAROV Forgive my bluntness, Mr. Goode, but I am a suspicious man by nature -- why are you so interested in resurrecting these talks? GEN. NAVANCE Yes, what do you get out of it? GOODE (feigned altruism) Why, I get what we all get potentially -- peace on earth, goodwill toward Man. And since I was runner-up for the Peace Prize, I thought this was the least I could, see if we can't come up with a solution together. (X) (offers) Shrimp? GEN. NAVANCE (offended) I beg your pardon? (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) White Rev. 12/17/96 34. 41 CONTINUED: 41 GOODE (off tray) (X) Shrimp, care for some? (X) PRES. KASPAROV You said Superman would be here to explain himself. Where is he? GOODE Well, he promised me held be here... (jokes) Maybe Lois Lane got tickets to 'Cats,' or something... (off their silence) What can I say other than it appears as though he's disappointed us yet again. However, I will be more than happy to shepherd you through the talks, if you will allow me. Come, sit! As Goode ushers them to the table, Superman strides in: PRES. KASPAROV Superman... GOODE (surprised) What... ? (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 35. 41 CONTINUED: 2 41 SUPERMAN Gentlemen, you must call a cease fire immediately. Believe me, there is nothing that war could ever achieve that you could not better achieve without it. GEN. NAVANCE Who are _you_ to lecture us? You're no better than a common politician. You stand for nothing. SUPERMAN I stand for what is right -- and what's right is peace! I beg you not to let any side issues distract you from our common goal. PRES. KASPAROV Peace is built on the cornerstones of trust, Superman. And if either one of us is to trust you again, first -- you must explain this. He abruptly tosses the incriminating Global Inquirer onto the table. GEN. NAVANCE And this. Navance tosses the incriminating Dirt Digger next to it. Superman hesitates, not quite sure what to say. GOODE (smug) Yes, Superman, we're all ears. SUPERMAN Gentlemen, you trusted me enough to ask me to mediate the talks -- trust me now when I say that that photograph is not what it appears to be. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 36. 41 CONTINUED: 3 41 PRES. KASPAROV Superman -- General Navance and myself... we understand such things. We're world leaders. But our people are not so sophisticated. They are outraged by what you've done -- they won't allow you to broker our peace talks unless you can give them a more... acceptable explanation. During this Goode's Aide appears, whispers in his ear. Before Superman can respond, Goode subtly reaches for the remote and clicks on the wall-sized TV. All eyes turn to: (X) 42 42 THRU OMITTED THRU 43 43 44 ANGLE TV 44 as the tape of Lois being ambushed by Barry Dunning plays: LOIS (ON TV) ... Whatever my relationship is with Superman, it's nobody's damn business but my own -- now get outta my face! As she stalks off, Dunning turns to the camera. DUNNING (ON TV) So there you have it, from Lois Lane's own mouth: she and Superman are indeed having a 'relationship,' and apparently it's so passionate, so intimate, she can't even put it into words! 45 RESUME - ROOM 45 as everyone reacts in silence. Goode flicks off the TV: GOODE Well, as far as denials go, that one ranks right up there with Watergate. GEN. NAVANCE We're finished here! (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 37. 45 CONTINUED: 2 45 Navance slams his briefcase closed. GEN. NAVANCE (CONT'D) (to Kasparov) My armies will crush you. PRES. KASPAROV My missiles will destroy you first. (barks in Podanskese) We go! Kasparov gestures to his Aides to follow him to the door. SUPERMAN Gentlemen, please -- GEN. NAVANCE Enough talk! The leaders pass Superman, cross to the door. Superman, frustrated, BLURS past them sending papers flying, blocking their path. SUPERMAN Mr. President, General, this is all a misunderstanding! I will explain -- and I will rebuild your trust in me. A beat as they look at him, curious: SUPERMAN (beat) Tomorrow at noon, I'll hold a (X) press conference, all your questions will be answered. I'll meet you here afterwards. If you're satisfied, we can talk peace. Please, thousands of lives depend on you. PRES. KASPAROV (grimly) No, my friend, those lives depend on _you_. GEN. NAVANCE And what you say tomorrow. GOODE Well, then, noon it is. I know _I'm_ looking forward to it. The leaders exit, along with Superman. Samantha enters just as Goode closes the door, suspicious: (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 38. 45 CONTINUED: 2 45 GOODE (CONT'D) He knows something, what's he got up his cape? Think... Think... SAMANTHA What do you mean ... ? GOODE I mean, SuperStud there thinks he's got an explanation for that photograph, but what in the world could it be? I mean, after all, it _is_ authentic... Samantha swallows hard in reaction. GOODE (CONT'D) If he wiggles out of this and convinces those bozos to shake hands, there'll be no stopping him. The Man of Steel'll have gotten a brand-new, non-stick, Teflon coating -- I'll never be Man of the Year! SAMANTHA Then, maybe we need to stack the deck a little. Increase our odds. I mean, hey, how bad can just a single dinky, photograph hurt Superman anyway? (drawing closer) I've come up with a plan to _guarantee_ that the peace talks fail -- and make Superman _responsible_ for it. GOODE I like it -- Miss _Senior_ _Vice-President_. What do we do?. Off her look: 46 INT. TOWNHOUSE NIGHT 46 Lois manages to get in the door, yelling at O.S. reporters as TV camera lights blaze and FLASHBULBS POP. LOIS I said no comment! Hey, get off my roses! This is private property! (then, offended) I beg your pardon, I'm a married woman! (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 39. 46 CONTINUED: 46 She slams the door shut, gathers herself, as: JONATHAN (O.S.) We had a pack of wolves outside our place, too. Lois looks up, notices: 47 ANGLE TO INCLUDE - MARTHA AND JONATHAN 47 emerging from the dining room. LOIS Martha? Jonathan? What're you doing here... ? MARTHA (confused) Well, Clark said you two wanted to talk to us about something... LOIS (in the dark) He did... ? Clark descends the stairs: CLARK I just flew them in. I thought (X) they should be here to hear what I had to say. LOIS To say about what? (X) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 40. 47 CONTINUED: 47 CLARK This so-called scandal is spreading like wildfire, Lois, and I've got to put a stop to it, fast. If I don't, war will break out and people will die. (X) (long look at Lois) So, I've decided there's only one way to clear this all up, and (X) that's to tell the whole world the truth. LOIS What... truth... ? CLARK That Superman couldn't've had an affair with Clark Kent's wife because -- (takes off his glasses) -- Clark Kent is Superman. (X) Off the shocked reactions, we -- FADE OUT _END OF ACT THREE_ --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 41. _ACT FOUR_ FADE IN: 48 INT. TOWNHOUSE - CONTINUOUS - NIGHT 48 Lois reacts to Clark's announcement. LOIS Clark, you can't do this -- CLARK Lois, the only way to regain the world's trust is to tell them I'm Superman. I don't have a choice. JONATHAN Son, do you realize what this will do to you? To everybody? CLARK I know it'll be hard -- MARTHA I don't think you know _how_ hard. Never mind your father and me, it won't affect us much. But it's going to affect you plenty. Clark Kent won't even exist anymore -- you won't have any kind of a normal life. JONATHAN And neither will Lois. She won't (X) be able to go anywhere as just herself anymore, let alone (X) continue on as a reporter. She'll (X) just become Superman's wife. (X) CLARK I _know_! Don't you think I've thought about all that? This isn't just some knee-jerk reaction. I'm (X) trying to stop a war, and I'm (X) trying to protect what Superman (X) stands for. LOIS If that's the case, then you're making a big mistake. (MORE) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) White Rev. 12/17/96 42. 48 CONTINUED: 48 LOIS (CONT'D) What makes you think the world's going to start trusting Superman again when they find out that he's been lying to them all along -- about who he really is? (beat, softer) Clark, there's a greater 'truth' to protect here and that's the idea of who Superman is. If you tell the world you're married, that you have feelings and desires like everyone else, the image of the hero is shattered, gone. People need to believe in the mythic truth -- that's what Superman is all about. That's what you need to protect above all else, even if it's at my expense! CLARK And I will protect it, Lois. Because even in this cynical world, someone has to stand for integrity. And if that's what I say I stand for, then I have to mean it. She watches him for a moment. He's not budging. LOIS Alright, fine. Then it looks like I've got until noon tomorrow to find out who's behind this and why. Excuse me. She grabs her purse and hurriedly exits out the back door, leaving Clark to ponder the dilemma. 49 INT. DAILY PLANET - DAY #6 - PRE-DAWN 49(X) Skeleton crew. Lois has been at it all night. She holds (X) one phone to her ear, speaks into another: (X) LOIS (into phone) (X) I know it's late, honey, but (X) I'm not giving up until I find (X) something (X) (into other phone) (X) ... Yes, I'm still holding (into Clark's phone) (X) I gotta go. I'll see you at the (X) press conference -- (X) (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) White Rev. 12/17/96 43. 49 CONTINUED: 49 LOIS (into other phone) (X) ... Hi, I'm trying to find the (X) name of a passenger who might have flown up to Chateau Roberge and back to Metropolis over night... Yes, I realize you don't usually give out that information, but this is Lois Lane, and I... (scowls) Hello... ? Hello... !? (hangs up) So much for professional courtesy. Jimmy approaches with paper in hand: JIMMY Lois, check this out -- you know those composite labs I've been checking out? LOIS (not interested) Yeah... JIMMY Okay, well here's a place -- 'Hank's Photo Lab' over on Third Street. Somebody told me to look into them because they're not real legitimate, but they do good work. You know, like fake passports and stuff? LOIS Jimmy, look, we're running out of time -- JIMMY (hands her sheet) Hank's used to be 'Dirt Digger's' biggest client. So I did some checking. Turns out a huge payment was made to them the day just before the photograph was published. Lois, suddenly intrigued, looks it over. LOIS (as she realizes) So, the photo could be -- a fake! (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 44. 49 CONTINUED: 2 49 JIMMY (duh) Well, yeah. But you knew that already. LOIS (covers) Oh. Yeah, of course -- I knew it, I just didn't... know if you did, you know -- know that it was a fake, I mean. JIMMY Right. LOIS Right. Great. Good. Well, what're we waiting for? Let's go pay Hank a visit She grabs the file shoots past Jimmy, who gives her a curious look. 50 50 THRU OMITTED THRU 55 55 55A EXT. PHOTOGRAPHY LAB - DAY 55A(X) A professional PHOTO LAB in a seedy part of town. At the (X) back door, Lois knocks, peers in the windows. (X) LOIS Looks like Hank's out to lunch -- (X) She moves to Jimmy, who has been busily picking the lock. (X) JIMMY That's too bad, 'cause... look he (X) left his door open! (X) LOIS (disapproving) (X) Where'd you learn how to do that? JIMMY From you. LOIS Boy, am I a bad influence. --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Pink Rev. 12/9/96 45. 55A INT. PHOTOGRAPHY LAB DAY 55A They enter as Jimmy pockets the lock picks and immediately (X) spots the state-of-the-art DEVELOPING EQUIPMENT. (X) JIMMY (CONT'D) Check it out -- Layout computer. Spectrum analyzer. Digital compositor. You can't even imagine what this kind of equipment can do. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 45. 55A CONTINUED: 55A LOIS I think I'm getting a pretty good idea... She can't help but notice a ROW OF 8 X 10 transparencies hanging on a dry-line... WE SEE an extremely convincing array of FAKED SHOTS: A WOMAN holding a half-human, half-E.T. baby; A FISHERMAN holding up a Mermaid on his line; an ANGEL floating over a man at a gravesite, etc. LOIS (CONT'D) ... Although, there's nothing here on Superman. Jimmy sits at the computer, fires it up: JIMMY These compositors usually have a memory cache. It should have it's last several entries stored digitally. Give me a second... As Jimmy works his magic, Lois snoops around, opens a file cabinet, thumbs through it. LOIS (off files) According to these files, Hank still does quite a bit of business with 'Dirt Digger.' (then notices) Wait a minute -- the invoices are addressed to Goode International. (digests that) _Randy Goode_... ? JIMMY (re: computer) Bingo! Lois joins Jimmy at the computer. He narrates as WE SEE: 56 INSERT - COMPUTER MONITOR 56 as unrelated DIGITAL PHOTOGRAPHS of Superman and Lois appear on screen. JIMMY (O.S.) See -- two different snapshots of you and Superman. Now, watch how easy this is... Before our very eyes, we see it happen -- the photos are realigned and repositioned so that Superman ends up on top of Lois in bed -- just like they were at the hotel! (X) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 46. 57 RESUME - LOIS AND JIMMY 57 He prints up a hard copy of the photo and shows it to Lois: (X) JIMMY Here you go -- instant scandal! (X) Amazing, huh? LOIS You have _no_ idea (checks watch) you download all the information from the compositor? So we can use it as evidence? JIMMY Sure, it'll take me a couple minutes though. LOIS Do it, then meet me at City (X) Hall -- I've got to stop Superman before it's too late! Lois heads out the door. Jimmy looks after her, CONFUSED -- JIMMY Before what's too late ? But Lois is gone. 58 EXT. PHOTOGRAPHY LAB - DAY 58 Lois pulls out her cell phone, and is about to dial when suddenly -- one of Goode's Thugs grabs her, covers her (X) mouth, and throws her into: (X) 59 INT. TOWN CAR DAY 59 as the Thug follows Lois into the backseat, where Goode is (X) waiting for her. Lois then recognizes Samantha behind the (X) wheel. LOIS _You_...? SAMANTHA Okay, so you're _not_ my idol. (X) LOIS Alright, Goode, what do you want? (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) FULL Blue 12/6/96 47. 59 CONTINUED: 59 GOODE Simple. I want Superman to rescue you, Ms. Lane. Sauce for the goose, as it were. And, just as he saves his paramour in predictable fashion, a bomb will explode in the very place where he gathered those old peace-treaty geezers, killing them both. (X) LOIS But... they're meeting at your office. You're going to blow up your own building? GOODE Who would ever guess I was behind it? Brilliant, don't you think? LOIS Twisted, sociopathic, sick -- those are the words that spring to _my_ mind, anyway. GOODE (teases Samantha) I don't think she cares much for your plan, Samantha... (laughs; to Lois) Naturally, both sides will blame. Superman for the blast because he will be with you at the time. That oughta discredit him once and for all. LOIS Except you can't make me yell 'help,' and if I don't, he won't 'come for me. GOODE Very brave, Ms. Lane, but I've already thought about that. Now, (X) if you don't mind, I've got a (X) mythic hero to destroy, and you've (X) got a plane to catch... (X) He reveals an atomizer and, before she can scream, he (X) sprays her with it -- no sound comes out of her mouth. She can't speak. (X) GOODE Drive on, Samantha. --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Green Rev. 12/11/96 48. 60 EXT. PHOTOGRAPHY LAB 60 ON the rear wheels of the Town Car as it SCREECHES off. DISSOLVE TO: 60A EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - DAY 60A There is tension in the air as the area is readied for Superman's press conference. Television NEWS TRUCKS jam the street. REPORTERS jockey for position in front of the podium, among them Barry Dunning: DUNNING (TO CAMERA) ... Is Superman faster than a speeding adulterer? Is he able to leap tall tales in a single bound? When the clock strikes twelve in just a few short minutes... 60B INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY 60B PULL BACK from the TV as President Kasparov and General Navance, seated at opposite ends of the conference table, watch Dunning at the press conference. DUNNING (CONT'D) (ON TV) ... we will finally know what the world wants to know -- does The Man of Steel have a dirty little secret, or doesn't he... ? Goode, also seated, checks his watch, stands: GOODE Gentlemen, I pray for peace. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to the press conference, show my support for Superman. Before he steps away, he reaches under the table and 60C INSERT - GOODE'S HAND 60C as he pushes a button causing a LIGHT to turn from GREEN to RED. CAMERA RAKES underneath the table to REVEAL it's lined with rows of dynamite, then -- (X) 60CA EXT. GOODE'S BUILDING - ROOFTOP - CONTINUOUS 60CA as a RECEIVER DISH activates and points skyward, locking in (X) place. Then, WE HEAR an ULTRA-SONIC signal being sent to: (X) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 48A. 60CB INT. HOTEL - CONTINUOUS 60CB(X) We are UNDER THE BED, where a bundle of dynamite is attached to a sophisticated triggering device. ON THE CUT, we HEAR the approaching ULTRA-SONIC signal activate a LIGHT on the device (turning it from GREEN to RED), ARMING IT. TILT UP to find -- Lois on the mattress, her waist strapped to the bed with a chain. 60D INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - CONTINUOUS 60D as Goode backs away from the table, crosses to the doorway and exits. As he shuts the door and WE HEAR the sound of it being LOCKED. --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 49. 61 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - DAY 61 as Superman CAPES onto the street and makes his way through the BUZZING crowd. He passes Martha and Jonathan, who look back at him apprehensively. He holds their look as reporters YELL out questions -- "Superman, how do you explain the photo?" -- "Are you sleeping with your best friend's wife?" -- "What about the peace talks?," etc. He continues up to the podium, glancing at an outdoor clock -- it's almost twelve. He looks around for Lois as citizens begin to "BOO," and as Goode meets up with Samantha. GOODE Everything set? SAMANTHA (nods) Lois is in position and the trigger mechanism is armed. Distant church bells begin to CLANG -- high noon. GOODE For whom the bell tolls... As Superman moves to the podium, ready to speak, Goode nods to a nearby OFFICIAL, who approaches Superman with an envelope. Superman opens it: 62 INSERT - ENVELOPE 62 as Lois' WEDDING RING and DAILY PLANET ID fall into his hand. The note reads: "Your girlfriend's at Chateau (X) Roberge, strapped to dynamite. You've got two minutes." (X) 63 RESUME - SUPERMAN 63 trying to remain calm, he grabs the microphone, cracks an uneasy grin -- SUPERMAN Pardon me, folks. Little snag. I'll be right back! And with that, Superman CAPES out. The crowd erupts, shocked, angry -- "What the... ?! He's leaving... ?!" SAMANTHA Hey, where ya going, Superman?! Does this mean you're abandoning the peace talks? --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 50. 64 INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - SAME 64 Reactions all around to Superman's sudden exit. PRES. KASPROV What kind of a stunt is he pulling now? Off Navance, equally troubled: 64A OMITTED 64A 64B INT. HOTEL - DAY 64B(X) as Superman enters from the balcony to find: (X) SUPERMAN Lois! She tries to speak, but can't. She gestures for him to go away, but he spots the dynamite under the mattress. SUPERMAN (CONT'D) Don't worry -- I'm going to get you out of here. He starts to break the chains, but she pushes him away, shaking her head no. Frustrated, she tries to communicate by playing _Charades_. SUPERMAN (CONT'D) (hip to it) Okay -- six words, go on... She nods, then holds up one finger. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 51. 64B CONTINUED: 64B SUPERMAN (CONT'D) First word... (off her gestures) Uh, pointing... gun... trigger -- (she nods) Trigger? Okay. Second word... 64C 64C THRU OMITTED THRU 68 68 69 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - CONTINUOUS 69 the crowd is getting restless. Goode checks his watch, steps to the podium: GOODE Citizens, please -- let's at least give Superman a chance here. I'm confident there's a perfectly good explanation. 70 OMITTED 70 70A INT. HOTEL - CONTINUOUS 70A(X) Lois is really getting into the game. She feigns blowing her nose: SUPERMAN Handkerchief... sneezing... blowing -- (off the "shorter" sign) --Blowing... _Blows_? Okay, 'Trigger Also Blows... Fourth word... 70B INT. GOODE'S CONFERENCE ROOM - CONTINUOUS 70B General Navance piles papers back into his briefcase: GEN. NAVANCE This is a waste of time. No more! President Kasparov, agreeing, readies to leave as well. --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 52. 70C INT. HOTEL - CONTINUOUS 70C(X) Lois excitedly gesticulates -- he's almost got it. She rapidly moves her thumb and fingers together -- SUPERMAN So long... Say good-bye ... I don't understand -- speaking ... ? Speaks... ? _Talks_ (puts it all together) 'Trigger Also Blows Up Peace Talks!?, She nods "yes," touches the end of her nose! Superman digests that for a beat, then: SUPERMAN okay, okay -- but first things first... Then, as he reaches down to lift her off the bed: 70D EXT. HOTEL - COURTYARD - CONTINUOUS 70D(X) Just as Superman BLURS out with Lois -- BOOM! -- a FIREBALL (X) inside EXPLODES, blowing out the window. He protects her (X) as DEBRIS rains down on them. Then she looks back at the (X) hotel, concerned: (X) LOIS Do you think anyone was hurt? (X) SUPERMAN No, it was just rigged for your (X) room -- (X) He SUPERHEARS a series of HIGH-FREQUENCY SOUND PULSES, in (X) coded TONES and with increasing INTENSITY. SUPERMAN (CONT'D) An ultra-sonic signal -7 that must be their trigger mechanism. Superman looks down, finds a MIRROR SHARD, gets an idea: SUPERMAN (CONT'D) Fortunately, light travels faster than sound. Then Superman FLINGS IT into the sky: INTERCUT: --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Green Rev. 12/11/96 53. 71 EXT. SPACE - ON MIRROR SHARD 71 as it flies INTO FRAME, spinning in SLOW MOTION. Superman waits for it to get into alignment, then squints and fires a full HEAT-VISION BEAM that banks off the mirror, angling down to: 72 EXT. GOODE'S BUILDING - ROOFTOP - CONTINUOUS 72 WE HEAR (as Superman would) the SOUND-WAVES DOPPLERING (X) TOWARD the RECEIVER DISH -- but Superman's HEAT VISION beam (X) comes out of the sky and VAPORIZES it! 72A EXT. GOODE'S BUILDING - MATTE SHOT - CONTINUOUS 72A to establish it's proximity to the press conference. 73 EXT. CITY HALL STEPS - CONTINUOUS 73 as Goode and Samantha, both looking at his building. She checks her watch, wonders what went wrong: SAMANTHA Where's the boom? GOODE No boom? SAMANTHA (realizes) I think we're screwed... GOODE (enraged) Then, I think it's time for a little trip out of the country. You and me, on a slow boat. Actually, me on the boat, you dragging behind! He starts off, but SUPERMAN BLURS UP with Lois in his arms. He sets her down and blocks their escape! SUPERMAN Going somewhere, Mr. Goode? LOIS (her voice back) We can prove everything, including the faked photograph. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 54. 73 CONTINUED: 73 GOODE Faked photograph -- what faked photograph? Lois sees Jimmy arrive, holding up the COMPUTER DISK. LOIS Does 'Hank's Photo Lab' ring any bells to you? GOODE No ... SAMANTHA (gulp) Oops... GOODE 'Oops?' What do you mean 'oops?' Goode glares at her as the reporters in the crowd begin to pressure Superman to answer their questions. SUPERMAN Officers, do you mind taking them? I have a statement to make... As Superman hands them off to a couple of COPS, Lois gives him a nervous look: LOIS What are you going to say...? SUPERMAN (unwavering) I have to say the truth, Lois. Nothing changes that. She braces herself as he steps to the podium. The crowd BUZZES with anticipation. He holds up his hands: SUPERMAN (CONT'D) Ladies and Gentlemen, first and foremost, let me just say that I've always stood for Truth, above all else. It's our moral compass, it's the only thing that stands between right and wrong. And everything that I am, everything that I do, is a reflection of that truth. And Superman has never and will never (X) do anything to dishonor that. I'll take your questions now. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 55. 73 CONTINUED: 2 73 REPORTER (O.S.) Are you having an illicit affair with Lois Lane? Superman weighs his answer, creating even more tension. SUPERMAN The truth is -- (off Lois) -- _no_, I am not having, nor have I ever had an illicit affair with Lois Lane. Camera FLASHES strobe him as the crowd BUZZES. REPORTER (O.S.) Then how do you explain that photograph? SUPERMAN The photograph in question is a fake. I have proof that shows it was all part of a carefully orchestrated smear campaign. REPORTER (O.S.) If nothing's going on, then how come Clark Kent's not here? SUPERMAN He _is_ here -- (nods to Lois) -- Right there with Lois. That's (X) what that ring on her finger symbolizes. Clark and Lois trust (X) each other -- and that's the only truth that really matters. (then) (X) Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got (X) peace talks to mediate. (X) Superman CAPES out as the crowd explodes in APPLAUSE -- including the Boy Scout who cried earlier. Lois looks to Jonathan and Martha, who give her the thumbs up. JIMMY Not bad, huh? (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Gold Rev. 12/11/96 56. 73 CONTINUED: 3 73 LOIS Had _me_ on the edge of my seat... off her look of relief: 73A EXT. HOTEL - COURTYARD - NIGHT #6 73A(X) An ORANGE GLOW flickers behind the repaired second story (X) window and drawn drapes. (X) 73B INT. HOTEL - NIGHT 73B(X) PULL BACK from the crackling fire in the fireplace, to find Lois on the floor, her bare shoulders poking out from under a blanket. She holds up a corner for Clark, in boxers and putting on his glasses, as he joins her: CLARK (X) (off room) (X) There, good as new LOIS Nice of superman to put the place back together. You're sure no one saw you, though CLARK Believe me, we're all alone. (X) checked. (X) (then) So... what'd you think of Superman's speech? LOIS It was good. But did he have to make _not_ having an illicit affair with me sound so... _noble_? (sees he's bothered) Are _you_ all right with it? CLARK I told the truth. Well. I answered the questions they asked truthfully. LOIS But you're not comfortable with it. (CONTINUED) --page break-- "sex, lies, and videotape" (#13) Yellow R. 12/10/96 57. 73B CONTINUED: 73B CLARK No, not totally. But you were (X) right, there was a larger truth to (X) protect. And I think, in this (X) case, it was the right thing to (X) do. (then) Just do me a favor -- let's be (X) more careful from now on, okay? (X) LOIS I promise. But, it _is_ still (X) safe to kiss my husband, right? (X) She leans over, starts to kiss him, but he recoils: (X) CLARK Yow -- your foot's _freezing_. (X) LOIS So, warm it up (X) She lowers his glasses. He arches a playful eyebrow, then (X) lifts up the front of the blanket and fires a shot of HEAT (X) VISION under the covers. Lois face flushes. She shoots (X) him a look: (X) LOIS (CONT'D) You missed (X) CLARK (smiles) No, I didn't. (X) He takes his glasses off, then dives under the blanket with (X) her. And, off their wiggling and GIGGLING, we -- FADE OUT _THE END_